Moms and Maids

Pointing Mom in the right style direction?

Hi everyone,

My wedding is going to be a semiformal barn affair in the afternoon during August. My mom doesn't seem to like that idea because she thinks it is too casual. I understand she'll come around to it, but for the most part she also seems to get pushy about some things. For example, I'm having my bridesmaids wear mint-colored chiffon short dresses. They're beautiful. But my mom seems surprised that they aren't wearing floor-length gowns. She also is concerned that the wedding is going to be too formal and will offend some people.  She also keeps looking at MOB dresses that are very heavy for this wedding - she really wants a floor length gown in a dark color and wants full sleeves. I don't really know what to tell her other than what our wedding is - and that the style just isn't going to work. Everyone is going to be in suits and short dresses, but my mom just can't get past that idea. I don't want her overdressed for the wedding, but I want to make her happy. How do you guys handle this?

Re: Pointing Mom in the right style direction?

  • Explain to her what other people will be wearing and what the weather will be like, and then let her make her own decision.  If she's more comfortable in a floor length gown, that's her perogative.  You can only truly control with yourself and your bridesmaids wear. 
  • Ditto PP. You can't tell her what to wear. You've done your best -- telling her where the wedding will be and what time of day and what other people are wearing -- and if she shows up way over-dressed, then she does, and it's on her.

    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    You've told her the general feel of the wedding. Now, let her wear whatever she wants to wear. If you pressure her into wearing something else, she won't feel comfortable.
  • lc07lc07 Sunny Southern California member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I am confused about your comment that your mother is concerned about the wedding being too formal, yet she wants to wear a very formal dress and wishes the bridesmaids were dressed more formally?

  • Oh sorry. I meant to informal
  • You have done all you can and now it's up to her to choose what she wants to wear. Is the MOG wearing more of a summer dress? Maybe you can show her what she is wearing?
    Best of luck with your wedding!
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