The Dos and Don'ts of Wedding Invites - Help please!

missteacherlady16

Hi guys! I feel like I'm now in the thick of wedding planning, just under 6 months out. My MOH and I have been searching around for a good deal on invites and found a reputable seller on etsy. But my MOH is also a graphic designer and happened to design an invite similar to the seller on Etsy (but of course not the same) and I happen to like her design better (I think mostly just because it adds a personal touch to our wedding day). So we're exploring options for getting it printed and try to weight the pros and cons. 

My first question is really about the response card. For the seller on Etsy, the response card had the option of being a post card or an RSVP card with an envelope. I'm thinking a little eco-friendly here (and cost-friendly) and the postcard sounds like a good idea BUT I feel nervous about making that decision. I know an envelope doesn't safeguard against the perils of delivering mail USPS, but does anyone have experience with sending an postcard response card in lieu of the traditional card in envelope response? Am I over-thinking this as much as I think I am?

The design of the invite (whether from the seller or my MOH's design) is simple and flat so nothing special there. But I started thinking about the double envelope invites that I have received in the past. It seems like a waste to me, but again, I've never been married before so I don't know what's proper and what's not proper. My gut instinct is to say no to the double envelope. Any thoughts there?

The wedding is Aug 30th - when do I send out the invites and when do I ask them to RSVP by? 

Lastly, has anyone made their own invites in the way I described above? Is it more cost efficient? I know there are a lot of variables that go into answering this questions, but I'd be curious to hear your experiences

Thanks!

hlvonb

ShellyDanger said:

Hi guys! I feel like I'm now in the thick of wedding planning, just under 6 months out. My MOH and I have been searching around for a good deal on invites and found a reputable seller on etsy. But my MOH is also a graphic designer and happened to design an invite similar to the seller on Etsy (but of course not the same) and I happen to like her design better (I think mostly just because it adds a personal touch to our wedding day). So we're exploring options for getting it printed and try to weight the pros and cons. Good idea!  I personally would go with the ones your MOH created if it isn't going to cost much more that way. It would be a cool memory!

My first question is really about the response card. For the seller on Etsy, the response card had the option of being a post card or an RSVP card with an envelope. I'm thinking a little eco-friendly here (and cost-friendly) and the postcard sounds like a good idea BUT I feel nervous about making that decision. I know an envelope doesn't safeguard against the perils of delivering mail USPS, but does anyone have experience with sending an postcard response card in lieu of the traditional card in envelope response? Am I over-thinking this as much as I think I am? Yes you're over-thinking this. Haha. I am doing the RSVP card with an envelope just because I personally think it's nicer then a postcard type. 

The design of the invite (whether from the seller or my MOH's design) is simple and flat so nothing special there. But I started thinking about the double envelope invites that I have received in the past. It seems like a waste to me, but again, I've never been married before so I don't know what's proper and what's not proper. My gut instinct is to say no to the double envelope. Any thoughts there? The double envelope might be a waste but it comes in handy if you're including kids as well. I am a fan of it too and it really doesn't add much to the overall weight of the invite. We are allowing kids at the wedding / reception and there are a lot of families that have 3 kids and a couple have 5. So we're putting either Mr and Mrs X and family OR   Mr and Mrs X on the outer envelope and then on the inside envelope we will put X Y Z A B (their names) so they know exactly who the invite is intended for.

The wedding is Aug 30th - when do I send out the invites and when do I ask them to RSVP by? You usually want to send the invites out about 4 or 6 weeks in advance. I would ask them to RSVP by 2 weeks prior to the wedding because then that way you have an extra day or two for any "slower arriving" RSVPs. This also allows for you to have time to contact those who do not RSVP and still give the venue / caterer a final headcount.

Lastly, has anyone made their own invites in the way I described above? Is it more cost efficient? I know there are a lot of variables that go into answering this questions, but I'd be curious to hear your experiences I haven't made my own invites so I can't really answer this but you are correct that there are a lot of variables so it might be hard to answer this question. Some people may do more elaborate or more simple invites than you are so it's hard to compare handmade and non-handmade invites very well or even compare handmade vs handmade very well.

Thanks!

@ShellyDanger

Please see my responses in red above.

emmyg65

We used postcards for our response cards and had no problem. Not only did we save by not having envelopes, but postcard stamps are cheaper! 

We skipped the double envelope because it's wasteful, and we weren't having a formal wedding anyway. We just put kids' names on the outside with the rest of the address.

Double check when your venue needs final headcount, and make the RSVP deadline at least a week before that. You'll need a few days to track down any folks who don't respond. Send invitations 6-8 weeks before your wedding.

We didn't make our own invitations, but I did design and print Christmas cards through Vistaprint. Since your friend is a graphic designer, she should know how to create a print-ready file of your design that you can take to Kinko's or print through a website like Vistaprint. If she's not charging her for the design, then you'll save a lot. But do be sure to thank her!

princessleia22

I designed invites both for my own wedding and my sister's wedding (both weddings are this summer).  I'm just finishing up assembly on mine.  I've sent my sister a sample of hers and she loves it, but we aren't doing final production on them yet. 

For my invites, I am having a less formal destination wedding, so I went with more fun design.  I did STD's that look like boarding passes and my invites are passport books.  Design of those took me much longer than expected.  And the overall cost was high because I changed my mind on a few things and actually redid them a couple times.

For my sister's invites, her wedding is more formal setting and we did pocket-fold invites. Like you, she found a design she liked on Etsy, but I could make them for much cheaper. Her design was much simpler and only took me a few hours to design and put together sample. We have determined that it will cost about $1.50 each, rather than her paying $6 each on Etsy.  And I'm doing all the design and assembly for free.  And I can print on laser printer at work for free.  So, that saves a lot of cost. But, it also gives her the option to do a bit more customization than what she may get by buying them elsewhere and I'm probably more tolerant of her suggestions and changes than a vendor might be. 

Cost-wise, it really depends on what you want to do. If you already have the design and materials chosen, you should be able to figure out what the total cost would be.  That is probably the biggest factor.  Just remember to limit making changes to them, especially after printing is done, or that can add up quick. Don't forget to include costs of any equipment that you may need. It sounds like your invites are simpler design, so you may not need anything besides a paper cutter. For mine, I used paper cutter, scoring board, corner rounder, perforator, rubber stamps, ink pads, etc.  I had a lot of the equipment already, but I had to buy a few items. For my sisters, all I need is the paper cutter, scoring board, and adhesive, which I already had. But, all of that can determine if it is actually cost effective to make them yourself. Time wise, for both invites, I found design and laying out most efficient sheet set up for printing to be the most time consuming part. For assembly, I have everything sitting out on my coffee table and have been putting them together for about an hour or so in the evenings. But, overall, the assembly isn't taking very long, even though I have more complex invites.

Most of your questions really depend on how formal your wedding will be. I did RSVP postcards and my sister has RSVP with envelopes.  Postcards tend to be less formal than envelopes.  Other than formality, postcards really win out, in my opinion, because you save cost on the envelopes and the postage. If doing postcards, you may want to buy a bit heavier weight paper though, although it doesn't need to be too stiff.

And make sure you meet the post office size requirements for postcards:

Rectangular;

At least 3-1/2 inches high x 5 inches long x 0.007 inch thick; 

No more than 4-1/4 inches high x 6 inches long x 0.016 inches thick

Again, double envelopes really come down to formality.  Double envelope makes it a bit more formal, but either way it's still optional. And the invite itself can portray the formality of the event, regardless of how many envelopes you have. Neither me nor my sister used them.  My sister's is formal enough to justify it, but we decided it wasn't needed since she did pocket invites. Inner envelope can be nice to address people more informally or specifically write each persons name to clarify who is included in the invite.  But, that can be done on outside of the invitation or in other methods also.  I actually wrote kids names and everything on the outer envelope, like this:

Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Doe

Joe Doe Jr. and Sally Doe

1234 Street

City, State 12345

 

As far as send date and RSVP date, typically you want to send out invite 4-6 weeks in advance. And leave people 2-3 weeks to RSVP. Then leave yourself a week or so to chase down people that don't respond.  Make sure you check with your venues to find out when you need to give them a final count, because that could determine your dates. I think most need count a week or so before wedding. You will have a few people that mail out last minute, so allow a few days for that, and some won't respond at all, so leave time to call or track them down to get response. My destination wedding venue needs final count a month in advance.  And I know my family is horrible at returning RSVP's, not always easy to get ahold of, and I need some additional info from guests, so I'm leaving myself 3 weeks to track them all down.  But, since they all need to travel (most about 1,000 miles), I figure they should know by then if they will be attending or not.  But for something more local, they may not know until closer to the date. If you do RSVP date too far out, people may be unsure or change their minds, meaning you are paying for no-shows or have people show up that had responded as no.

 

CMGragain

Do check your wording before you print!

huskypuppy14

Not 4-6 weeks, send them 6-8 weeks before the wedding. 4 weeks before may be cutting it way too close.

lookame3639

I made my own invites. It was not cheaper than going with aprinting company...well I sshouldn't say that I could have gotten printed invites at a local store for cheaper than what I paid for when I made my own.

I only needed a few invites so I bought a print your own kit but I wasn't satisfied with plain black and white invites so I did some embossing on each of them as well as sealed them all with wax seals. I'm happy with them I just spent more than if I would have gone to the local store *shrug*

missteacherlady16

Wow! What a detailed and thorough response! Thank you for your advice/thoughts and perspective on your own invite-adventures