Engagement Party Invitation Help - 2 parties one weekend

aziegman

First, let me start this off by saying I'm SO lucky to be having an engagement party with both my and Fi's families (immediate and first cousins.). This will take place in late spring/early summer. My parents proposed a Sunday brunch for me because we have religious relatives who would not travel on a Saturday to come for a Saturday evening party. So Sunday it is!

Of course as a multi-tasking bride, I would like to have my out of town BM's and MOH the day before the engagement brunch (Saturday) to try on bridesmaid dresses. Since they are going to be in town that weekend anyway for dress appointments, it only makes sense to host a sunset themed outdoor dinner for my nearest and dearest friends, and surprise the out of town bridesmaids with a gift in their honor of being in my wedding party. This would be in addition to the brunch. 

I started to design my invitation for the engagement party weekend. People who are only invited to the brunch will recieve a brunch invite, which announces engagement and says "Together Forever" on top with our names. People who are invited to both days will get a smaller card that say "Best Friends" as the catch phrase, but I am drawing a blank as to how I can word this and tie the two themes together. The majority of the people we would invite to the Saturday evening are going to be in town anyway for trying on dresses etc, and I've been hinting at things. The bridesmaids have some idea that they are bridesmaids but they have not received a formal invite to do so yet from me. I just told them to make travel arrangements to be here this weekend. I'm just having trouble with wording and tying the two themes together by this wording. Does anyone have any creative and or practical advice for me?

Thank you!!!!!!

artbyallie

aziegman said: First, let me start this off by saying I'm SO lucky to be having an engagement party with both my and Fi's families (immediate and first cousins.). This will take place in late spring/early summer. My parents proposed a Sunday brunch for me because we have religious relatives who would not travel on a Saturday to come for a Saturday evening party. So Sunday it is!
Of course as a multi-tasking bride, I would like to have my out of town BM's and MOH the day before the engagement brunch (Saturday) to try on bridesmaid dresses. Since they are going to be in town that weekend anyway for dress appointments, it only makes sense to host a sunset themed outdoor dinner for my nearest and dearest friends, and surprise the out of town bridesmaids with a gift in their honor of being in my wedding party. This would be in addition to the brunch. 
I started to design my invitation for the engagement party weekend. People who are only invited to the brunch will recieve a brunch invite, which announces engagement and says "Together Forever" on top with our names. People who are invited to both days will get a smaller card that say "Best Friends" as the catch phrase, but I am drawing a blank as to how I can word this and tie the two themes together. The majority of the people we would invite to the Saturday evening are going to be in town anyway for trying on dresses etc, and I've been hinting at things. The bridesmaids have some idea that they are bridesmaids but they have not received a formal invite to do so yet from me. I just told them to make travel arrangements to be here this weekend. I'm just having trouble with wording and tying the two themes together by this wording. Does anyone have any creative and or practical advice for me?
Thank you!!!!!!




Asking your bridesmaids all together at a party is not really a great idea. Some of them may feel pressured to say yes even if they don't want to for financial or whatever other reasons. Besides, if they are important enough to you to be in your wedding, they should be important enough for an individual conversation or phone call to ask. As for trying on bridesmaid dresses, you also should ask them individually for a budget before you go. You don't want to be the first one to say or imply a number, even if indirectly via the tags. Let them tell you first what they're each comfortable with and pick a dress or just a store with dresses under the lowest number.

aziegman

As quoted from my posting above: 

"The bridesmaids have some idea that they are bridesmaids but they have not received a formal invite to do so yet from me. I just told them to make travel arrangements to be here this weekend. I'm just having trouble with wording and tying the two themes together by this wording. Does anyone have any creative and or practical advice for me?"

So. please leave only creative or practical advice. The bridesmaids are pretty sure I will ask them, but I am buying them a gift and making a surprise element to it! The are not going to be blindsided by my asking them. Don't be rediculous! LOL!!

Maggie0829

aziegman said:

As quoted from my posting above: 

"The bridesmaids have some idea that they are bridesmaids but they have not received a formal invite to do so yet from me. I just told them to make travel arrangements to be here this weekend. I'm just having trouble with wording and tying the two themes together by this wording. Does anyone have any creative and or practical advice for me?"

So. please leave only creative or practical advice. The bridesmaids are pretty sure I will ask them, but I am buying them a gift and making a surprise element to it! The are not going to be blindsided by my asking them. Don't be rediculous! LOL!!

You cannot dictate how people post.  And I stick by what I said in my post over on your thread in invites and paper.  Making a big event out of asking your friends to be BMs is over the top and puts a lot of pressure on them to say yes.  Yes they may have some idea that you are going to ask them but you do not know what their answers will be so asking them in a group will force them to say yes even if they really want to say no.

I think you need to back away from Pinterest and wedding shows.  You are making everything into a bigger, over the top thing then it really needs to be.

HisGirlFriday13

1. You can't tell people how to post.

2. The word is spelt 'ridiculous.' No 'e.'

3. This is an over-the-top, unnecessary, pointless idea. Just ask them.

4. Do not hold two WR-events on the same day with over-lapping guest lists. Why? Because inevitably, someone who is invited to the dinner will mention it to someone who's not, and then you'll have caused hurt feelings.

climbingsingle

This is totally over the top and not necessary. It doesn't need to be a huge production. Just ask them. 

Also, the logistics of this are sort of confusing. Are you asking them and then bringing them dress shopping the same day?

ei34

Ditto climbingbride, the logistics are a bit off. Prior to dress shopping, you need to ask each BM individually what her budget is. Your plan sounds like there won't be much alone time with each lady before you get to the dress shop. Before knowing the lowest budget, how are you sure that the shop you're planning to go to even has dresses in the right price range?
As far as invitations, it sounds like your parents are hosting your engagement party, so they will send out that invitation and you can just send a separate invitation for the event you're planning/hosting. Although personally, it's really awkward being asked to be a BM in front of other people. It happened to me recently, and I felt worse telling my friend no than I would have if there hadn't been an audience.

chibiyui

aziegman said:

As quoted from my posting above: 

"The bridesmaids have some idea that they are bridesmaids but they have not received a formal invite to do so yet from me. I just told them to make travel arrangements to be here this weekend. I'm just having trouble with wording and tying the two themes together by this wording. Does anyone have any creative and or practical advice for me?"

So. please leave only creative or practical advice. The bridesmaids are pretty sure I will ask them, but I am buying them a gift and making a surprise element to it! The are not going to be blindsided by my asking them. Don't be rediculous! LOL!!

Practically, this a very bad, no good idea. At best everyone's a bit caught off guard, at worst someone says yes in the spirit of the event but doesn't really/can't be a BM. Also, it can be very awkward to talk budget in a group setting. If everyone else says 200 is their budget, it can be very hard to say you can only spot 75 for a dress, know what I mean?
I also would not want to be asked to be a BM and then go dress shopping same day. Thats a bit much.

Do you have a date for your wedding yet? Venue? These are all things that can influence your wedding party's attire. Don't jump the gun on getting dresses if you don't have your ducks in a row.

jenna8984

Yea no offense but this sounds incredibly awkward. An engagement party usually happens immediately after getting engaged so your wedding is likely not for at least 9 months- a year? Absolutely no reason to shop for dresses that soon and I would like a head's up. I would not like to travel out of town and show up to "omg we're going dress shopping today!!" I'd be like um, what, slow your role crazy.

artbyallie

Excuse me, but my advice was super fucking practical and not at all ridiculous.

Viczaesar

artbyallie said:

Excuse me, but my advice was super fucking practical and not at all ridiculous.

As usual.