Weight loss: What the hell am I doing wrong??

edandy

OK so I have like 20 pounds to lose. I've been going at it for 2 years and I still haven't budged more than 5 pounds. I promise you it's not in my head, I really do have a lot more fat to lose. Anyway, I eat between 1,200 and 1,700 calories a day, and I work out for about an hour 4 days a week. I do 30 minutes of weight training and 30 minutes of cardio. This is a new part of my routine as of two months ago, although it did not help at all. I swim for about an hour on the weekends. I sit around most of the day but I do walk at nights sometimes. I usually have oatmeal for breakfast, salad soup or sandwich for lunch and whatever I want for dinner except small portions. I refuse to do any sort of special diet, because I know I will gain it all back the second I stop eating that special diet. I drink lots of water and get enough sleep. The only time I even budge a little bit, measuring or scale otherwise, is when I practically eat nothing all week. Another factor is that the moment I took the pill 5 years ago I've always been slightly overweight. I know people think either birth control does or does not make you retain weight: I used to think that it was just me being lazy until I spend two years eating healthy and exercising. I even quit drinking thinking that a night of beer and wine was stopping me from losing weight!!!

My insurance is not good so I would rather not go to the doctor, although I am nearly at my last straw. I just don't understand anymore, I eat lots of fruits and veggies and exercise way more than I even need to and I'm still not losing weight. I'm not asking to be a twig or anything, I just don't want my damn gut anymore. At least I'm healthy, there's that to be happy about.  I suppose I need some advice, and maybe some opinions on the birth control thing. I used to be so thin before I started taking it! The last time I asked a doctor he said I was probably eating more than I thought I was (not true, i have a food scale and everything)

I'm ready to just quit and not care anymore. If I can't lose the extra weight why drag myself out of bed at 5:30 everyday to get to the gym, and why not enjoy my beer and wine? Fack it

edandy

I'm thinking what if I stop taking birthcontrol until I don't hate my body and then watch what I eat when I get back on? I know it didn't make me gain weight, I was a total pig when I first got in it. However, could it be preventing more weight loss? 

kitsunegari89

I started to lose weight when I got off my birth control and gave up milk and excess carbs (particularly from grain). Milk is my #1 enemy, though. That and processed sugar. I eat 900-1500 calories a day depending on if I'm working out or not. I'm not a big eater, really. Since giving up carbs and trading them in for fats, I can easily go an entire day without feeling hungry. Insulin spikes are the worst.

I gave up BC because I was eating really clean and organic, and I felt silly to eat organic meat while I was pumping my own body full of artificial hormones.

Edit: I should note my homeostasis weight is about 8-10lbs heavier than my self imposed "ideal" weight. Eventually you will hit a wall with weight loss unless you do extreme food deprivation. This is due to genetics... everyone has a place where their body is comfortable and it might not fit in with society's ideal. However, my "wall" before I changed my diet and went off BC was much higher (about 10lbs) than my "wall" after, so it's still worth doing even if you lose nothing and just get healthier. Also I drink a lot of freshly-juiced vegetables, and can't recommend it enough. Carrot juice and beet juice in particular is amazeballs for your skin and veg juice is great if you want to juice fast before a big event to lose water weight and a few extra lbs.

Christina2323

I am in a very similar situation. I am about 20lbs over where I would like to be and always have eaten pretty well, worked out a little, been generally active, but nothing crazy.  Then about two months ago, I started running and training for a 5K, I do weights and other cardio on my non-running days, I walk almost 2 miles every day just to get to and from work.  I cut added sugar out of my diet for the most part (not entirely, but enough you would think there would be some change).  I eat pretty much only natural, unprocessed foods, few carbs, and keep in the 1500 calorie a day range. I could cut out alcohol altogether, but I have already cut way back.  And...after 2 months...nothing.  Not one lb. gone.  People keep saying, I'm sure your body is changing, clothes fit better, don't worry about the scale.  Uh, no.  My clothes don't fit better either!

I spoke to a trainer and he said to do high intensity intervals on my days off running and to do more weights. So, I'm starting on that.  I also want to do a juice thing for a weekend and see if I can sort of clear things out or jump start anything. I am on the fence about what I think of them, but sometimes I just feel like a mini cleanse would help. 

Good luck edandy, I'm sending you good thoughts, at least.  I switched to a different BC a few years ago and I do think it helped (the hormone level is way lower in what I use now--so low it wouldn't be traceable if you tested for it), but of course...I'm still stuck in a plateau so I think there are probably a few things at play for you, too.

emmaaa

Like you said, birth control itself does not make you gain weight. It does give you cravings and if you don't control them then you can pig out and over eat. I did this when I went on BC right after high school. I gained 20 pounds. I then decided (for personal reasons and feelings on birth control) along with my FI that I would stop taking it. I lost 15 pounds.

Eating healthy is good but don't starve your body. You need well rounded meals. It is also good to snack and eat less each meal. So eat a healthy breakfast, have a small snack, eat a healthy lunch, have a small snack, have another snack if you get hungry before supper, then have a healthy supper. Try to avoideating after 7. Drink plenty of water, green tea is also very good for you. I also think that if you want to have a "cheat meal" it would be better to do it at lunch so it can digest better. I don't know your schedule so that may not work for you (it wouldn't for me).

It can be frustrating to try so hard to lose weight and get nowhere but persistence is the best secret. Have you thought about a personal trainer? If you have plateaued then they can jumpstart your routine. Stress can also cause you to retain weight.

I understand where you are coming from. I have a pudge and love handles that I can't seem to get rid of no matter how much excersizing and healthy eating I do. But the most important thing is to focus on your health and not your weight, which is why I would recommend not giving up. You may not see results but i'm sure your body is happy that you are attempting to be healthy.

edandy

If I cut any more calories I will be starving myself. Sure I might lose weight but I'll just gain it all back because I'm not living the rest of my life eating less than 1000 calorie a day. I eat a lot of fruits and veggies and I sometimes do HIIT training. I just don't see any magical food or exercise that I haven't tried that will make a difference. I'm wondering if my B/C is just preventing me from losing excess poundage. I forgot I am about to start my monthly, so I really have like 15 pounds to lose. When you work at 15 pounds for 2 years you start to wonder how it can still be you and not some outside influence. I would rather be 15 pounds heavier than I should be than cut out bread and dairy and starve myself, because as soon as you add that food back in you'll gain the weight back. (I know, I've tried it). However, I do restrict and view those carby bad things as a once-in-awhile treat. Everything in moderation, right?

I really don't think I'm fooling myself on the food, I measure everything and record it on calorie counter. I suppose I'm really asking you guys if you know much about hormone imbalances and your own experience. I hate to be that girl that blames it on hormones but I don't know what to do next except completely stop eating (which is silly). I guess I would have it coming because I used to tell everyone around me that it's only diet and exercise and it's rare for the problem to be outside of that. 

I don't want to be a standard super thin idealistic lady, I like my big butt and boobs and hips. I just want to be comfortable in a bikini, as well. 

I have noticed a little bit of toning in my arms and thighs since I started weight lifting. I wonder if I did more weight lifting and less cardio if I might be happier about my tummy and chubby legs? I've run 5k's and everything, I'm really quite active. This is why I need outside opinions because I really don't understand what I'm even doing wrong at this point. 

I am going to cut my birth control and just see what happens. I've been on it since I was 17 (and that's the same time I gained 30 pounds, but that was because of poor diet and quitting sports) so who knows what I'm truly like?  

Ever since I have been eating well and exercising I feel great. I don't want to give that up and I never plan to. I just want my fat gut to go AWAY.

I'm lucky that my FI insists that i'm "getting too skinny" and he always tries to get me ice cream and stuff... lol! He needs to eat healthier too, honestly. He doesn't understand because he has always been in really good shape. 

I feel like I'm just whining and venting at this point. Thank you for tolerating me, ladies!

edandy

Thank you guys for the tips, I feel a lot better. 

kitsunegari89

I've cut out bread and milk, but I don't feel starved. Though I do still eat a little bread once in a while. Just not every day. I still eat cheese, but do not drink milk. Fermented dairy (yogurt, cheese, keifer, etc) are generally fine, but do avoid sweetened yougurts and things like that. The trick with reducing carb intake is to up your intake of fats at the same time. The lipid hypothesis is a myth. Fats from unprocessed food do not cause heart disease. Do avoid vegetable oils, and hydrogenated fats, though. The main reason I gave up milk was because it causes acne for me. However, I noticed it was easier to lose weight after I stopped drinking milk and eating whey and soy protein powder. Now I try to get my protein from food. I'll never add milk back in, and I'll never go back to eating bread every day. There is so much other tasty stuff to eat! And bread is just a vehicle for cheese, which I now eat on top of fruit.

If your body has reached homeostasis, and you're not losing anymore weight even after quitting milk and excess carbs, then give up and enjoy your life!

bethsmiles

My birth control didn't make me gain weight but I could NOT lose it while on BC. I went off mine and it's been a lot easier to lose the weight. I would definitely try going off it to see if that helps any.

edandy

bethsmiles said:

My birth control didn't make me gain weight but I could NOT lose it while on BC. I went off mine and it's been a lot easier to lose the weight. I would definitely try going off it to see if that helps any.

This is what I'm thinking and hoping it will be.

Yeah, I'm not a big dairy eater, maybe half a cup of cheese a week and that's about it. I'll have wheat toast a few mornings a week, it's a cheap low calorie kind. I eat more rice than any other sort of carb thing. But even that I have to limit. 

If the b/c thing doesn't work, I will go to the doctor and see what they say. I'm not thin enough that I should just be happy about it and give up. It really is not natural for me to have a big ol' gut and thighs like I do! I was a lot slimmer until I went to college and started birth control. 

jay788

I agree with @Mrshutzler! Whole, unprocessed foods are best, and that includes meats and traditional fats! Avoid sugar, processed foods and grains (especially wheat).

Also, I stopped eating bread a while ago, and I really don't even want it anymore. You can retrain yourself to crave good foods.

But I would also recommend going to your doctor for thyroid tests.

It's also possible that you are at the correct weight for your body. BMI doesn't account for most factors like muscle mass, frame size, etc. It would be good to have a dunk tank bodyfat test done. It's possible that all of your exercising has helped you replace fat with muscle!

edandy

What do you guys replace bread with? Potatoes? Rice? Quinoa? Or do just never eat any of those and have the willpower of a god?

Damn, I thought I was strong about temptation. 

edandy

Yeah and like I said I eat a lot of oatmeal and veggies and grilled chicken. I can't honestly believe I have a diet problem. If what I eat now isn't good enough than fuck it I will stick to chubby. LOL

I also rarely go out to eat, I haven't had any sweets since practically Christmas and I usually drink gin and diet tonic to save calories when drinking (which I stopped doing >:(. I feel like I'm just rejecting all your answers......

kitsunegari89

edandy said:

What do you guys replace bread with? Potatoes? Rice? Quinoa? Or do just never eat any of those and have the willpower of a god?

Damn, I thought I was strong about temptation. 

I still eat potatoes, quinoa, and rice. All of these things I consume with lots of fat, and with a meal. For example: a baked potato with butter and cheese and a portion of roast chicken with vegetables. I always have a little carb on the days I work out! I find that bread bloats me up, so I tend to avoid it because I hate being bloaty. I still eat a little bread and butter once in a while. Like 1-2 times a week. Just not everyday. I found that I craved it less when I started eating more fat. Fat is my favorite thing in the world and I would die without it.

jay788

When I'm really being good, I try not to eat any grains at all. I'll use spaghetti squash instead of pasta, riced cauliflower instead of rice... Right now I'm adding back in some things like rice and potatoes, mostly for financial reasons (i.e. wedding costs!). My ideal diet is veggies, fruits, meats and fats, but that gets expensive when you're doing all organic/grassfed etc!

It's not hard as long as you are eating enough good fats! Don't be scared of it! Try eating fattier cuts of meat, eggs for breakfast, good olive oil on salads, etc.

edandy

mrshutzler said:

edandy said:

What do you guys replace bread with? Potatoes? Rice? Quinoa? Or do just never eat any of those and have the willpower of a god?

Damn, I thought I was strong about temptation. 

I still eat potatoes, quinoa, and rice. All of these things I consume with lots of fat, and with a meal. For example: a baked potato with butter and cheese and a portion of roast chicken with vegetables. I always have a little carb on the days I work out! I find that bread bloats me up, so I tend to avoid it because I hate being bloaty. I still eat a little bread and butter once in a while. Like 1-2 times a week. Just not everyday. I found that I craved it less when I started eating more fat. Fat is my favorite thing in the world and I would die without it.

Ohh okay! Yeah, my FI has a gluten allergy and we are moving back in together in a month, so I'm going to probably cut bread out anyway. I just don't eat a loaf before it molds by myself. I want to experiment with quinoa more, so that'll be happening. 

GARION said:

When I'm really being good, I try not to eat any grains at all. I'll use spaghetti squash instead of pasta, riced cauliflower instead of rice... Right now I'm adding back in some things like rice and potatoes, mostly for financial reasons (i.e. wedding costs!). My ideal diet is veggies, fruits, meats and fats, but that gets expensive when you're doing all organic/grassfed etc!

It's not hard as long as you are eating enough good fats! Don't be scared of it! Try eating fattier cuts of meat, eggs for breakfast, good olive oil on salads, etc.

Yeah, budgets are a problem for me esp. since I'm just now graduating from school and want to get a masters! (and wedding)

Ugh I need a money tree

jay788

@edandy, don't we all...

climbingsingle

Try changing up your cardio. You might have hit a plateau. Change up your weight routine too. 

The birth control pill has never affected my weight, both being on it and going off. And I've been on it since I was a teenager. 

Inkdancer

When you figure it out, will you tell me?

One thing I will suggest: take your measurements instead of using the scale. Muscle is heavier than fat, so when I first "lost" some weight, it was actually muscle that I lost from an injury that made me quit dancing. If you're building muscle, your scale number won't decrease much even if you're slimming inches off.

arrippa

I know what I am doing wrong, I just ate a package of Girl Scout cookies.

I am exercising (training for half marathon). I think changing up exercises, drinking lots of water, eating healthy AND getting lots of sleep are key to losing and keeping it off. I guess I am lucky that my BCP didn't cause or prevent weight loss (my eating habits did).

Also-you said you were weight training. Could the weight be muscle and not fat? Have you tried to measure your body?

kitsunegari89

moemacWed30594 said:

I know what I am doing wrong, I just ate a package of Girl Scout cookies.

I am exercising (training for half marathon). I think changing up exercises, drinking lots of water, eating healthy AND getting lots of sleep are key to losing and keeping it off. I guess I am lucky that my BCP didn't cause or prevent weight loss (my eating habits did).

Also-you said you were weight training. Could the weight be muscle and not fat? Have you tried to measure your body?

CaitOst21

Try cutting out dairy, glueten and basically processed foods altogether, I did that and through diet alone I lost 15 pounds in three months and it became a complete lifestyle change for me. I have never felt better and will never go back to eating dairy or processed foods ever. I have found that I can't ever think I will go back or I will. 

Just a little info, Oatmeal, especially if you are eating the instant, has been shown to actually make people gain weight. http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S003193841000199X

http://www.self.com/blogs/flash/2011/09/why-oatmeal-make-you-gain-weight.html

Salad dressing is packed with the fats and oils and depending on what salad dressing you use, some dressing are 200 calories per tablespoon. Turns a healthy salad into a unhealthy one quickly.

Sounds like you're doing everything right in the gym! Have you ever thought it is some kind of other health problem that isn't related to diet or exercise?

arrippa

mrshutzler said:

moemacWed30594 said:

I know what I am doing wrong, I just ate a package of Girl Scout cookies.

I am exercising (training for half marathon). I think changing up exercises, drinking lots of water, eating healthy AND getting lots of sleep are key to losing and keeping it off. I guess I am lucky that my BCP didn't cause or prevent weight loss (my eating habits did).

Also-you said you were weight training. Could the weight be muscle and not fat? Have you tried to measure your body?

Just add wine and that's my plan for tonight.

 

itsmestacey123

Have you tried a program like Weight Watchers?  I was in a very similar spot to you a few years ago - counting calories, being active regularly, etc. and wasn't losing weight.  Weight Watchers teaches you how to eat a well rounded diet and focuses on fitting it into your daily life.  I highly recommend it.  There's so many more important aspects to healthy living than just counting calories and going to the gym.  It really worked for me and I've kept the weight off too.

kitsunegari89

CaitOst21 said:

Try cutting out dairy, glueten and basically processed foods altogether, I did that and through diet alone I lost 15 pounds in three months and it became a complete lifestyle change for me. I have never felt better and will never go back to eating dairy or processed foods ever. I have found that I can't ever think I will go back or I will. 

Just a little info, Oatmeal, especially if you are eating the instant, has been shown to actually make people gain weight. http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S003193841000199X

http://www.self.com/blogs/flash/2011/09/why-oatmeal-make-you-gain-weight.html

Salad dressing is packed with the fats and oils and depending on what salad dressing you use, some dressing are 200 calories per tablespoon. Turns a healthy salad into a unhealthy one quickly.

Sounds like you're doing everything right in the gym! Have you ever thought it is some kind of other health problem that isn't related to diet or exercise?

Yeah oatmeal is the worst. And usually it's sweetened, so that makes it doubly bad.

edandy

itsmestacey123 said:

Have you tried a program like Weight Watchers?  I was in a very similar spot to you a few years ago - counting calories, being active regularly, etc. and wasn't losing weight.  Weight Watchers teaches you how to eat a well rounded diet and focuses on fitting it into your daily life.  I highly recommend it.  There's so many more important aspects to healthy living than just counting calories and going to the gym.  It really worked for me and I've kept the weight off too.

I did I lost ten pounds on it and then it stopped working for me! I switched to calorie counting and lost another ten.

Now I'm stuck. And I do measure.

tammym1001

I am in almost the same boat as you. 20 lbs. over weight (although I would be happy if I could just lose 10), I work out 5-7 hours a week, eat 1,200 calories a day, and........nothing happens! The only difference is that I'm not on birth control. I still can't get the weight to come off no matter what. I take my measurements every week and those haven't changed at all either. I've had my thyroid and just about everything else tested and they are fine. The only thing my doctor could think of is that it might be my stress levels that are causing me to hold onto fat in my tummy area. He said I needed to be less stressed, but who the hell can do that? LOL

I obviously don't have any advice because I have the same problem, I just wanted you to know that you aren't alone in this and I know how ridiculously frustrating it is. I've wanted to give up a ton of times because I feel like what's the point of doing all this work for nothing? Just keep at it though. Even if you aren't losing weight at least you are being healthy.

dolewhipper

I just wanted to add something that no one esle has posted yet: maybe you have a dietary intolerance. I cut out gluten and dairy and although I've never been overweight, it cut down on all bloating and I lost weight without even trying. If your fi has a gluten allergy (do you mean a wheat allergy? You cant be allergic to gluten unless you mean he has Celiac disease) then try having a food journal and cut out the gluten.  I love me some quinoa and rice is a staple in our home.

Try cutting out gluten for 6 weeks and then slowly bring it back into your diet (watch for foods you wouldn't think have gluten in it, like soy sauce). Add it back into your diet over the course of 3-4 weeks. You can do this for dairy, soy, corn as well. More people have in tolerances than they are aware.

Etf to finish my thought.

yogablossom

When you work out a lot, especially doing weight lifting, you are not noticing a weight change because muscle weighs more than fat. You are probably burning a ton of calories and fat when you're doing your cardio workouts and weight lifts, but replacing it all with muscle, which is a good thing! Keep up the hard work! It'll certainly pay off

edandy

tammym1001 said:

I am in almost the same boat as you. 20 lbs. over weight (although I would be happy if I could just lose 10), I work out 5-7 hours a week, eat 1,200 calories a day, and........nothing happens! The only difference is that I'm not on birth control. I still can't get the weight to come off no matter what. I take my measurements every week and those haven't changed at all either. I've had my thyroid and just about everything else tested and they are fine. The only thing my doctor could think of is that it might be my stress levels that are causing me to hold onto fat in my tummy area. He said I needed to be less stressed, but who the hell can do that? LOL

I obviously don't have any advice because I have the same problem, I just wanted you to know that you aren't alone in this and I know how ridiculously frustrating it is. I've wanted to give up a ton of times because I feel like what's the point of doing all this work for nothing? Just keep at it though. Even if you aren't losing weight at least you are being healthy.

Ahhh good luck. I'll let you know if I ever figure anything out! I was so mad yesterday I ended up just having a bunch of margaritas and I don't even regret having that much sugar. Sometimes we deserve a treat! lol!

Yeah, I've spent a lot of time being gluten free because my FI has celiacs disease. I don't agree with people who drop gluten to lose weight, or to be healthy. I think it's really stupid. Mostly because I saw him become so sick because he wasn't able to get any nutrients and he lost a ton of weight. This was before they really had any research on it. But, that is a whole 'nother debate that we really don't need to get into, just kinda hurts to people trend diet when he almost died from it. So I know it's not an intolerance because I haven't had weight loss if I go without gluten or if I eat it.

BTW he's fine now

tammym1001

I also just want to add my personal pet peeve: muscle doesn't weigh more than fat. 1 lb. of muscle weighs the same as 1 lb. of fat. They are both one pound. I don't mean to offend anyone who has said that, but it drives me crazy. What they mean is muscle is more dense than fat so as you lose fat and gain muscle you may not lose weight, but you will definitely lose inches. If you take your measurements and you aren't losing any inches though then your lack of weight loss isn't from working out too much.