Confused about tipping

crunchymamaof2

I've read on here several times that you don't need to tip vendors who own their own business, like photographers and DJs. The reasoning makes sense to me as they're receiving all the money from your event. But what about assistant photographers? Members of a band? Now, going by that reasoning, shouldn't we not be tipping hairstylists/makeup artists when they also own their own business? Obviously in a salon they rent a space (usually) but some have their own mobile beauty services. I couldn't imagine not tipping my makeup artist. Can someone just explain the difference between these two scenarios? I'm just having a hard time grasping this, probably simple, concept. Thanks

HisGirlFriday13

The etiquette rule is you don't HAVE to tip anyone who owns his or her own business, because all of the profits are coming to them. In a lot of salons, the salon takes a cut of a non-owner stylist's pay for services.

It's never inappropriate to tip. You may certainly tip anyone you feel did an exceptional job.

If you want to tip your MUA, go right ahead.

At our wedding, we:

-- Tipped the photographer by buying him a gift card to one of his favourite restaurants

-- Didn't tip the wait staff/valet/bartenders/DOC at our venue because there was a substantial gratuity built into our contract with them

-- Didn't tip the florist because her delivery fee was built into the contract and all she had to do was drive the flowers there and set up two altar arrangements (we had bouquets, corsage, boutonnieres, and two altar arrangements)

-- Didn't tip the priest because he didn't charge us a fee, but we did pay him generously and make a donation to the church

-- Made a donation to the church where we got married because it's not our regular parish

-- Sent flowers to the church secretary at the church where we got married because she had been so helpful

I did not tip the owner of the salon who did our hair, for two reasons. One, she's the owner. (I did tip, in cash, the other two stylists who did my BMs' hair). And more importantly, she really screwed up my mom's hair, made my mom feel unattractive and unimportant, and made my mother feel like an inconvenience. I paid her her fee, obviously, but I wasn't about to tip someone who was rude to my mother.

vmj23

I am wondering the same.   My photographer is an independent photographer, owning her own company but what about her second shooter?  I understand etiquette wise you do not have to tip a owner, but what is customary?  

mellyD2014

Our photographer will have an assistant with him - but I know that he is paying them because that was one of his sticking points when we were negotiating prices. We're going to buy our photographer a hat and gloves with the logos of his favorite hockey team as a thank you, but don't plan on tipping the assistant at this time.

Planning on tipping hair and make up artists 15%-20%

Won't be tipping the florist - they have to drive a total of maybe 10 miles to drop off our centerpieces and bouquets at 2 different locations, so it will be a quick set up, plus their set up fee is included in our price.

Gratuity for servers, bartenders, etc. is already included in our venue contract, so we won't be tipping additionally.

We have a 10 piece band - we may give each member a little something, but we're going to check with FSIL, who also had them at her wedding, to see what she did.

I think that covers it!

Emmy1493

QQ: What about if your photog. works for one of those mill companies. Would you still tip then as they are technically free lancers?

HisGirlFriday13

Emmy1493 said:

QQ: What about if your photog. works for one of those mill companies. Would you still tip then as they are technically free lancers?

If they're free-lancers, yes, I would tip. Because if they're working for a company as a free-lancer, the company is taking a cut of the money (probably a large cut). In this case, the photographer is not the owner.

Emmy1493

HisGirlFriday13 said:

Emmy1493 said:

QQ: What about if your photog. works for one of those mill companies. Would you still tip then as they are technically free lancers?

If they're free-lancers, yes, I would tip. Because if they're working for a company as a free-lancer, the company is taking a cut of the money (probably a large cut). In this case, the photographer is not the owner.

Okay, awesome! That's what I was thinking, just wanted to make sure. Thanks

[Deleted User]

Personally I think you should tip anyone that you are happy with their service, if they are an owner or not. I use to go to a stylist who owned the salon & she still cut hair, I still tipped her because I was happy with my haircut.

In regards to tipping an assistant, I think it depends on where they just an assistant or a second shooter? If they are a second shooter and do a good job, you should consider giving them a tip also.

Chipmunk415

Here's what I did-

For DJ, I gave him a cash tip in the check with the second half of the payment for our wedding. I'm also following up with an awesome review letter.

For officiant, (who has become a friend) I got her a gift card to a restaurant chain, and told her to feel free to take some of the centerpiece flowers home/to her dad in the nursing home, as well as extra cake and cupcakes (our favors). Her father loved the flowers and cake she shared, and her brother (developmentally disabled) gave her a very nice note to give to me with a thank you for the cupcake.

Gave coordinator a gift card to her favorite restaurant

Giving photographer gift card to a restaurant.

Nothing for floral- got all of our flowers through Costco

Hair- gave a big tip plus brought her breakfast morning of, as she came in before normal opening time to do my hair.

Giving a friend who did a reading a gift card for groceries (we are state employee young professionals, groceries are more important than dining out right now), and are having her and another girlfriend over for dinner to thank them for helping my mom load stuff into car and taking extra centerpieces to nursing home for people to enjoy.  They also took home copious amounts of cake.

Gave limo driver a tip as well

lookame3639

We're having a tiny non traditional wedding so this is what we're planning on doing

-tipping our officiant as well as handing her fee (her tip is a little more than 15% right now)

-we don't plan to tip the ceremony site as of yet since we are staying on property (it's a castle turned b&b and all the staff is the same) we may tip when we are checking out

-tipping our dinner staff dependant on if gratuity is built into the check or not

-photographer tip is dependant on the pictures we receive

lookame3639

Oh hair and makeup since they are traveling to us i have planned a tip however if they are rude and/or give shoddy work i probably will only tip a little or nothing at all

kla728

I haven't thought too much about tipping since our wedding isn't until October, but something one of the PPs mentioned brought up a question for me.  Our contract with our venue includes the ceremony fee, reception hall fee, tables/chairs/basic linens/etc, all catering and beverage, service staff, and the time/efforts of our Day of Coordinator.  The contract mandates 20% gratuity on top of our actual total.  Would you consider the DOC to be covered by this, or separate?  

crunchymamaof2

I'd ask them who the mandated gratuity covers.