Bachelorette Party Guest List

thesummersky

Hey all,

My MOH offered to host a bachelorette party, which I'm grateful for - and I'm sure it will be a blast! However, she said that she will be hosting it with another girl that I'm not really friends with, and went on to say that 'traditionally, everyone invites as many girls as possible.' I can see this turning into a rager, which is not what I want at all. I would have told her this right then, but she had to get off the phone right after telling me that, and we don't talk as often lately since we have opposite work schedules. Also, I'm not sure if it will be rude for me to say that I don't really want friends of hers there that I'm not friends with. I have heard before that it is rude to tell others they are being rude, and I do not want to offend anyone.

Additionally, what is the etiquette on who should and should not be invited to the bachelorette party? It seems sensible to assume I wouldn't invite people that won't be at the wedding, right?

Thanks, all!

Simply Fated

Only people who are invited to the wedding should be invited to the Bach party, so this guest list issue should be nipped in the bud right away.

OliveOilsMom

thesummersky said:

Hey all,

My MOH offered to host a bachelorette party, which I'm grateful for - and I'm sure it will be a blast! However, she said that she will be hosting it with another girl that I'm not really friends with, and went on to say that 'traditionally, everyone invites as many girls as possible.' I can see this turning into a rager, which is not what I want at all. I would have told her this right then, but she had to get off the phone right after telling me that, and we don't talk as often lately since we have opposite work schedules. Also, I'm not sure if it will be rude for me to say that I don't really want friends of hers there that I'm not friends with. I have heard before that it is rude to tell others they are being rude, and I do not want to offend anyone.

Additionally, what is the etiquette on who should and should not be invited to the bachelorette party? It seems sensible to assume I wouldn't invite people that won't be at the wedding, right?

Thanks, all!

First, only those who are invited to the wedding are to be invited to any pre-wedding parties.  So from the sounds of your post, your MOH's friend would not be invited, right?  

If a rager is not what you are looking for, find time to call your MOH as soon as possible to let her know that while you appreciate her efforts to throw a B party, you would rather have a private dinner with some close friends over a bar hopping night.  If MOH is not interested in toning down the party, then just decline it altogether.  If no one else decides to plan anything, you probably won't get a b party then.  

artbyallie

You are absolutely correct in that you should only invite people who are also invited to the wedding. If you are concerned that these hosts (is the other girl invited to the wedding, incidentally?) will break that rule, I feel you should decline the party, particularly since it seems like it will not be the type of party you are even interested in.

It's not rude to tell her that only people who are getting wedding invites should be invited, or to give her a list and request that she not add to it. The guest list and timing of the party are the details you are supposed to be involved in, as the guest of honor.

AddieCake

Aside from the etiquette of not inviting people who are not invited to the wedding, it doesn't make any sense for her to invite people to a party for YOU that you aren't even friends with.