May 2014 Weddings

RSVP aggravation

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Re: RSVP aggravation

  • I'm a bit of a control freak and this has been THE WORST part of it. I have planned every minute detail but I cannot plan for these people and it's driving me CRAZY.
    sarahsmiles326ArtTeacher23
  • Our deadline is tomorrow and I am missing 31.....There better be a stack in our mailbox tomorrow. 
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  • bellaluna290bellaluna290
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    edited April 2014
    Fezzik42 31 out of how many? I hope that wasn't your firm deadline.

    We are missing about 25. I do have a yes/no for a few of those people though..including my sister -_-
    Our "deadline" is Monday...but we really don't need to know the final count until a few days before.
    I also need for people to RSVP to our rehearsal dinner
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  • 32 out of 150.  And I left some wiggle room in there too as far as the deadline.

    Also, to make my day extra special, a couple who was invited RSVP'd with their 3 children.  Um, no,
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  • Fezzik42 said:
    32 out of 150.  And I left some wiggle room in there too as far as the deadline.

    Also, to make my day extra special, a couple who was invited RSVP'd with their 3 children.  Um, no,
    Did you state that it was an adult wedding only? Many people with kids assume they are also invited unless stated otherwise. Of course, if I wasn't sure, I would be in contact with the bride to find out if my kids were also invited.
  • @windie people are wrong to assume that. The names of the guests invited are on the envelope. If kids are invited, their names are on the envelope as well or it would say Mr and Mrs so and so and family, or The So and So Family. It's standard etiquette. Most of us feel like we have to put adults only on the invites because people either don't know the etiquette or ignore it.
    bellaluna290
  • Fezzik42 ughhh..that's awful. I'd call them up and kindly set them straight ASAP.

    and what @ddvirts said. You aren't supposed to write/mention 'adults only' on your invites.
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    whitjoy
  • 3 days until our deadline and I still have 56 outstanding RSVPs!! Granted, I gave myself an extra couple of weeks between my RSVP deadline and when I need to finalize with the caterer and venue... but seriously, how hard is it to mark a box and drop a card in the mail?? Its already stamped and addressed, should be a piece of cake!

    I also got my first RSVP with an added +1 that wasn't invited from my college bestie. I haven't decided what I'm going to do with it yet. If our numbers are low enough I may just say thats fine but its still incredibly rude! She could have at least called and checked before just writing it down! And on top of that, she didn't even write a name, just +1!! So either she didn't want to name the person or she has no idea who she's bringing yet. Really hoping this is the only one I get...
  • ddvirts said:
    @windie people are wrong to assume that. The names of the guests invited are on the envelope. If kids are invited, their names are on the envelope as well or it would say Mr and Mrs so and so and family, or The So and So Family. It's standard etiquette. Most of us feel like we have to put adults only on the invites because people either don't know the etiquette or ignore it.

    I totally agree with you that people should know the invite is for who is on the envelope - but alas they don't... and we all have heard what assuming does ;)
  • FutureMrsN3312FutureMrsN3312 Dirty Jersey
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    Our RSVP date was Friday the 18th.  We were missing close to 100 responses.  Happy to report we're only waiting on a handful more.  The worst offenders were family and people that just planned weddings in the past year.  You would think they would remember the stress and be a little more on top of things.

    Try to be patient.  I know easier said then done...  I was FREAKING out bc our minimum was 200 people with a guest list of 280.  We figured we could easily reach the 200 guests.  I was nearly shitting my pants on RSVP day when we only had 94 people coming.
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  • Our RSVP date is May 3.  As of today, we are missing about 30 (out of 110 sent).  But the past few days we've had 2-3 in our mail every day so hopefully that will continue.

     

    My dad's family "doesn't think they have to RSVP" ever.  For anything.  Apparently my sister had to call all of them to ask if they were coming to my shower a few weeks ago.  So i was harassing my dad about that the other night and he was like "fine, i'll send mine back" and i got it yesterday.  His invitation was for him, his wife, and his wife's daughter (under 18 and lives at home).  The RSVP i received had checked off "will attend" but DID NOT FILL OUT THE NAMES ON TOP.

     

    Luckily I had read that you should number the back of each RSVP before sending them out and keep track just in case someone doesn't know WTF they're doing and i was like "does that happen?" but i did it anyway.  I called him up to sass him about it last night.  Who doesn't know how to fill out an RSVP?  He should have just let his wife do it, i'm sure she knows what she's doing.

     

    I'm type-A and desperately want to start on my seating chart and the wait is killing me!  FSIL has offered to do any follow ups for FI's family at least so that will be helpful.  Unfortunately most of the missing RSVPs are from my family and our friends.  Sigh.

  • We gave up on the whole children thing. People were just RSVPing them left and right and we couldn't keep up. Thankfully we had enough No's to allow for them.
  • Not really. 
    My fiancee has a large family (greek and italian) 
    so the more the marrier.
    we're expecting at least 175.
    maximum 200. (smaller then most) if we invited everyone we'd be in the 400s
    so at this point im just keeping my fingers crossed
    everything will work out :) 
  • That is disgusting and rude.  We are having a plated dinner, therefore we are paying almost $100 per plate.  Unless my guests are told that they have a plus one (which they all do), they can kiss my butt.  A plus two or more???  Hell no.  I can not believe that people do not have enough manners to know you cant do that!  It's not a backyard BBQ... it's your WEDDING.  I would flip out.
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