I'm not really concerned with what people wear to my wedding... that includes wedding party attire. I picture our wedding being pretty laid back and low stress (at least as much as a wedding can be). All I care about is being married by end of that day and celebrating it with those closest to us. For bridesmaids, I think the different style dresses is great and usually looks better than matching since they can get dresses that suit their body type. So, WHY is everyone else so concerned with making sure everyone matches exactly?
I told BM's to get any short, navy blue dress. In whatever style or price they want. I figured this was best since they live in different states. They decided to coordinate anyway and got matching dresses from Davids. Well, 2 of the 3 match. 3rd BM is 6 years old. So rather than paying high cost for dress she will grow out of quickly, we went with cheaper navy dress from retail store. It probably would be better to have all match or all different (mainly because I want 6yo to feel part of the group), but whatever. And nobody will likely question kid wearing different dress.
Then, my dad is super concerned with making sure he matches his attire to groomsmen. He wants exact same suit/tux they wear. I told him he could wear whatever he wanted, it doesn't even need to be same color, but he wants to match. They are already spending a lot of money travelling to my destination wedding, so it doesn't make sense to spend a lot on something he may not wear again. FI picked a navy suit he liked. FMIL was kind enough to offer to purchase suits for all the guys, including my dad, because there was a good sale going on. He wanted to match, so now he does.
Now, we also have a 12 year old groomsman, who apparently wears an odd, hard to find suit size. We've only found a couple navy suits in his size, but FMIL doesn't like them. Why? Because they aren't exact same style as other groomsmen suits! Mainly, so far we can only find 3 button suits for him and other groomsmen have 2 buttons. Really??? It's not that big of a deal! Buy him a navy suit, ANY navy suit, and it will be fine. Nobody will even notice that it's not exact same! And if they do, again, I don't think anyone will side-eye the kids wearing slightly different attire than rest of wedding party.
I only care about what I'm wearing and what FI is wearing. Honestly, if everyone else showed up in blue jeans or shorts, that would be okay too. It might raise an eyebrow for a second, but then I'd turn around, say I do, and have an awesome day. It doesn't really matter to me. I just want to keep things as simple and low-stress as possible. Why does everyone else feel the need to complicate everything? And why doesn't anyone seem to believe me when I say it's okay if they don't match? At this point the "we have to match" stress is getting annoying. Picking an outfit to wear to a party shouldn't be that complicated!