Chit Chat

I need to whine

I'm cold and wet from my walk between the train and work. Everything in my bag got soaked from how miserably the wind and rain attacked.

This weekend is going to suck. FI committed to fixing 2 people's cars (nothing on any of our cars that need to be fixed, of course) on Saturday. He's awesome at this stuff and I love how he takes care of everyone. While he's doing that, I'll be handling laundry, groceries, and trying to make his son do the homework that he put off for all of spring break. Plus I get to buy more moving supplies and do the paperwork on a storage locker.

We begin the clean out of my apartment Sunday. We've been living together for 8+ months but I kept my apartment up until now. A total waste of money but my last serious relationship ended so badly that I was scared to give up my home (something he respected as he's been around the block before too). The lease is finally ending and neither of us has any worries about this working so it's time to get rid of it. But, of course, there was work that needed to be done on his house before we could make space for my stuff. None of that work has been done (we'll blame a combination of health issues, bad weather, and the overly optimistic idea that we have all the time in the world) so my crap's going into storage. I have until the end of April to get my crap out. We have a few people helping with packing on Sunday (FI included) and I hired people/got a truck for 2 weekends later for the stuff to get moved out of the building and into the storage locker.

FI has foot surgery on Monday. It's minor (bone spurs in his big toe) but he's diabetic and had an ulcer that only finished healing a few months ago. He doesn't worry about these things at all and thinks he'll be back on his feet the next day. I know it's a minor thing but it scares me- and I know that it's going to be harder on him than he thinks. It's also lousy because of timing- he's not going to be able to help with the move, all of the car work that he's committed to has to be done before then, and he's not going to be able to work on a lot of the projects that he's planned for a while. I hate moving and tend to get overwhelmed with it and hate that I feel like I'm going to be doing it largely alone. The surgery is also happening sooner than we expected because of a change in scheduling. And I feel like an evil bitch because I'm making it about me when this surgery is about him.

So basically, I'm cold/wet, scared about FI, fussy about my upcoming move, and feeling like a terrible person.

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Re: I need to whine

  • We've been living together for 8+ months but I kept my apartment up until now. A total waste of money

    That's us. We've been living together in my apartment since September, but have kept his. We'll be moving him out of his place and moving a bunch of my stuff to storage and try to make everything fit. But it's a tiny 1 bedroom so its gonna take some serious organization. Not looking forward to it. I demanding that we keep brunch plans with friends on Sunday so at least i have omething to look forward to. GL on your move!
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  • Thanks, @mschristie123!

    I know how that goes! My living situation is a mess- I own a building on one side of town but, it was rented when I moved back so I got a new place. FI owns his house and has a kid in school so we'll be at his place. It's a tiny house though so we're not sure how to handle things. It's a fine balance- I have nicer stuff than he does (more years of disposable income) but his fits the space better. We talk about how to handle it but have put off actually doing anything until now!
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  • Sounds like you need to wine.

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  • Moving is the test of a relationship.  It doesn't get much worse than that.  We've done it three times.  Recently we have both come into some money.  There is the option to move to a larger, more luxurious home.  Nope.  We don't want to move again.
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  • CMGragain said:
    Moving is the test of a relationship.  It doesn't get much worse than that.  We've done it three times.  Recently we have both come into some money.  There is the option to move to a larger, more luxurious home.  Nope.  We don't want to move again.
    I said that after moving 4 times in two years because of my school situation.

    Then Hurricane Sandy happened only 5 weeks after moving into our new place.

    Now we really don't want to move again.  If we could buy our current apartment, we totally would.
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

  • CMGragain said:
    Moving is the test of a relationship.  It doesn't get much worse than that.  We've done it three times.  Recently we have both come into some money.  There is the option to move to a larger, more luxurious home.  Nope.  We don't want to move again.

    That's how I felt as well.  I thought it would be easier to rehab the current home rather than move. Gutted the entire kitchen and the 3 baths down to studs.  I still had to purge, pack, and restore everything in those rooms.  Painted and refurnished the remainder of the house.  More purging, packing, and restoring.  Now that it's all finished, moving looks like it may have been easier, since I basically had to purge and pack 2/3 of the house anyway.  Shoulda, coulda, woulda.  I'm sure I would have whined either way.
  • Wine is a wonderful thing!

    Moving is horrible. Relationship-wise, I'm not worried. Plus, I've moved so many times in the past 2 years that it frustrates me but I can handle it. I think I'm mostly just dealing with the combination about worrying about FI's surgery and being annoyed by the fact that I don't have him to help with the move. I'm feeling very high maintenance at the moment!

    @mobkaz- I don't envy you at all! That sounds like a lot of work. I hope it was worth it!
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  • CMGragain said:
    Moving is the test of a relationship.  It doesn't get much worse than that.  We've done it three times.  Recently we have both come into some money.  There is the option to move to a larger, more luxurious home.  Nope.  We don't want to move again.
    This is PRECISELY why after we get married, when we buy a house, I want it to be our forever home that we renovate to our likes. Moving is a fucking pain. He moved in with me when we started dating, and then we moved in to a place that was "ours" about a year ago. If I didn't want a house so much and FI didn't dislike our apt, we would never move..... 
    Anniversary
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  • Moving sucks!  I've been in my house for 12 years, but it won't work for my new family.  FI is used to moving every few years with the Army, so I'm going to be depending on him in June when we find a new home together.  I hate moving!
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