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Invites and Paper

Proofread my invites please

Doctor KingOfHavoc and
Mr and Mrs KingOfMayhem
request the honor of your presence 
at the unity of marriage of their children

PrincessOfHavoc

and

DukeOfMayhem

Friday, the thirty first day of October
two thousand fourteen
at half past six o'clock

Church
Address

Both families are hosting, it's not black tie formal, and my father is widowed. It looks off to me, but I think it may related to not having my mother mentioned.

This is the first draft, we've got a bit of time yet. We're not sending save the dates as everyone is local, but all guests are aware of wedding date already.



Re: Proofread my invites please

  • I would skip the 'unity of marriage' and say 'at the marriage of their children.' The wording before makes it sound off, and have the word 'of' too close together.


  • I agree on the "unity of marraige" piece and also I'd eliminate "day" and just say "Friday, the thirty-first of October".
  • I don't like the "marriage of their children" line. You are adults. I would leave it at "at the marriage of" or "as name and name are united in marriage."

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  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited April 2014
    Doctor KingOfHavoc
    Mr and Mrs KingOfMayhem
    request the honor of your presence 
    at the marriage of

    PrincessOfHavoc

    and

    DukeOfMayhem

    Friday, the thirty-first of October
    two thousand fourteen
    at half after six o'clock

    Church
    Address
    City, State
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    KeepMovingOndoeydo
  • Thanks! I was basing ours from another wedding, but it did look off.
  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 Boston Suburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    You're still your parent's children, whether you are 2 or 102 years old. 
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  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited April 2014
    laurynm84 said:
    You're still your parent's children, whether you are 2 or 102 years old. 
    The wedding invitation is a simple note from the hosts to the guests.  It is not a family tree, or a place to explain relationships. Iif you want to call yourself a "child", you can certainly do that, but I think it sounds a bit odd.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • The "children" thing just depends on your personal preference, but even the lady selling my invitations mentioned she doesn't like that and would eliminate it. "It makes it sound like you are children and if you are children you shouldn't be getting married" she said. I'm still my parents child but I'm 27 and my fiancé and I have been living together for 2 years. If we were 22, just out of college, and still living with parents it might feel more appropriate to me.
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