Destination, brought up by FMIL?

LarraO2530

Just wanted to get some opinions, wasn't sure if I should post here, or another board. My FI and I have 2 years until we're getting married and have been looking into local/semi-local beachy venues for ceremony as well as the reception. Everyone who will be invited is in DE, so by local/semi-local we are talking DE and MD beaches. My FILs have just returned from a wonderful trip to the Dominican Republic and were telling us about how great it was and how beautiful the island is. We have not been able to see their pics yet, but the description was amazing. During this converstation, my FMIL mentioned that since she and her husband as well as FI's grandparents are owners of the timeshares, have we considered doing a destination wedding? We haven't really, since we are planning to invite about 75-100 people, all of which are close family and friends, but we thought entirely too many to as to go anywhere farther than our local beach areas. Apparently, the way this timeshare works is that anyone who is a guest of the owner gets to partake in the special rates, ammenities, etc of the resort. We thought this was amazing, and decided to maybe consider this...I found out after the conversation with FI's mom and step-dad that his father mentioned to him before about some gorgeous places in FL. His whole family loves to travel, and it seems like his parents are game for it. Is this something we should consider to start asking our other guests if they'd be willing to travel that far?

Sugargirl1019

My initial thought is: "the timeshare is going to allow 100 people who are guests of the owner to partake in all the amenities?"

I would clear this with the location first. Then proceed into looking if it will work.

Maggie0829

LarraO2530 said:

Just wanted to get some opinions, wasn't sure if I should post here, or another board. My FI and I have 2 years until we're getting married and have been looking into local/semi-local beachy venues for ceremony as well as the reception. Everyone who will be invited is in DE, so by local/semi-local we are talking DE and MD beaches. My FILs have just returned from a wonderful trip to the Dominican Republic and were telling us about how great it was and how beautiful the island is. We have not been able to see their pics yet, but the description was amazing. During this converstation, my FMIL mentioned that since she and her husband as well as FI's grandparents are owners of the timeshares, have we considered doing a destination wedding? We haven't really, since we are planning to invite about 75-100 people, all of which are close family and friends, but we thought entirely too many to as to go anywhere farther than our local beach areas. Apparently, the way this timeshare works is that anyone who is a guest of the owner gets to partake in the special rates, ammenities, etc of the resort. We thought this was amazing, and decided to maybe consider this...I found out after the conversation with FI's mom and step-dad that his father mentioned to him before about some gorgeous places in FL. His whole family loves to travel, and it seems like his parents are game for it. Is this something we should consider to start asking our other guests if they'd be willing to travel that far?

Just because people love to travel doesn't mean that they will want to use their money and leave to travel to your wedding location.  Typically people who love to travel love to pick their own location.

As with any DW you will most likely get a lot of declines.  A DW is asking a lot of your guests (money, time away from work, etc)

Why not have a local wedding and then honeymoon in the DR?

lvgirl1000

I don't see any mention of your family/friends in your post.  Would they be able to attend a DW?  If they weren't, would you be okay with that?

Bottom line, if it appeals to you & FI and you can accept that some guests will not be able to attend, you should consider it .  

OliveOilsMom

The way our timeshare works is that any guest of the owners, would be the people who are staying in the condo with the owner or on behalf of the owner.  For example, my parents gave us their timeshare for our honeymoon.  We were their guests, even though they were not there.  We attended a timeshare presentation, which my parents said was optional and we ended up buying FWIW. 

Unless your FI's parents & grandparents have enough timeshare points to rent enough condos for all guests, any of your guests who stays off property would not be given the special amenities and perks.  Unless this timeshare resort is also a hotel (not all of them are), it could be difficult to get your guests to book there.  Also, sometimes you just can't book the place you want for the date you want and you need to be a little flexible.  If its high season, some of your guests may not be able to book anything.

H & I love our timeshare.  Due to our points this year and our flexibility, we are taking 3 vacations in the next 9 months, we wouldn't have been able to afford that, if we didn't have the timeshare.  With that said, you're trying to plan a wedding and I just would not want to deal with the added timshare headache in addition to planning the wedding.

HisGirlFriday13

Clear this with your VIPs first. Just because your FILs love to travel doesn't mean your friends will be willing to spend their vacation time and money on a trip for your wedding. 

DWs typically (although not always -- WinstonsGirl had 100% attendance) have lower attendance rates -- is that something you're OK with?

tcnoble

LarraO2530 said:

Just wanted to get some opinions, wasn't sure if I should post here, or another board. My FI and I have 2 years until we're getting married and have been looking into local/semi-local beachy venues for ceremony as well as the reception. Everyone who will be invited is in DE, so by local/semi-local we are talking DE and MD beaches. My FILs have just returned from a wonderful trip to the Dominican Republic and were telling us about how great it was and how beautiful the island is. We have not been able to see their pics yet, but the description was amazing. During this converstation, my FMIL mentioned that since she and her husband as well as FI's grandparents are owners of the timeshares, have we considered doing a destination wedding? We haven't really, since we are planning to invite about 75-100 people, all of which are close family and friends, but we thought entirely too many to as to go anywhere farther than our local beach areas. Apparently, the way this timeshare works is that anyone who is a guest of the owner gets to partake in the special rates, ammenities, etc of the resort. We thought this was amazing, and decided to maybe consider this...I found out after the conversation with FI's mom and step-dad that his father mentioned to him before about some gorgeous places in FL. His whole family loves to travel, and it seems like his parents are game for it. Is this something we should consider to start asking our other guests if they'd be willing to travel that far?

This. I'm happy you are recognizing the need to talk to your guests before moving forward with DW planning. Check with your VIPs. If your VIPs include all 75-100 guests, then you just need to be prepared for a high rate of decline... but also be prepared for 100% attendance. It could go either way. Definitely start to consult with VIPs before any further planning.

But most importantly if a DW isn't what you and your FI want, then don't move forward with it! My mother would absolutely LOVE for us to have a DW but it wasn't what we wanted, nor was it feasible with our guest list. So we put the stop on that one quickly. Remember, FMIL might love the idea of a beach vacation/wedding combo but that doesn't mean you have to!

SammiNJonni

Clear it with your VIP's his family may be all for traveling for your wedding but is your family okay with it.

a13049

I agree, w/ pp. You need to decide who your VIPs are, who you really want at your wedding and check withy them . We had a great response from our VIPs so we went for it, thinking we would have maybe 50 percent attendance. We had to add almost 20 people to our guest list because people we asking to come to our wedding and if just can't say no. Luckily we have plenty of budget and space for it.

LarraO2530

lvgirl1000 said:

I don't see any mention of your family/friends in your post.  Would they be able to attend a DW?  If they weren't, would you be okay with that?

Bottom line, if it appeals to you & FI and you can accept that some guests will not be able to attend, you should consider it .  

My family is 100% out of the question, tiny background: they are all nuckin futz and my mother is the high queen of the nut farm. All of our friends who would be invited are close friends of the family with whom my FI grew up, and went to school with, etc. The only "new" friends are mine, with whom I go to nursing school. I would be OK if they weren't able to drop everything for the wedding, I love these girls, but we have just recently become friends over the course of the program and I totally understand the stipulations of booking this type of wedding. 

As for the timeshare, the way they were explaining it (we've only been able to take advantage of the beautiful Wyndham Bonnet Creek in FL) with as many people in the family who own, everyone would be accommodated on the resort in villas up to 7 bedrooms each. Of course, my FI and I would have our own suite for privacy. 

I understand when booking a vacation you'd rather book your own to a destination of your choosing, this just kinda caught us off guard a little since FI's mom is who suggested it with absolutely no hinting from us. As far as FI's family goes, they are the most wonderful people a person could ask to be related to. To be honest, if one of our relatives booked a wedding in China, I believe they would all jump at figuring out a way to be there with bells on. Of course we would check with all of our VIPs before seriously entertaining the idea of a destination and go from there as far as finding a place and making sure accommodations are exactly what we need. FI and I are open to the idea, as the coasts of DE and MD have some pretty icky water to overlook hehe. We still have plenty of venues to check out locally, I just thought I'd test out the waters a bit to see what the general consensus is. 

Thanks for all your input everyone!