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wedding planning woes

So, my FI proposed in November 2013, and we're planning a wedding for December 2015. We finally sat down last night and discussed a budget (which I've been asking for since he proposed) and he's so overwhelmed with how expensive it is that he doesn't want a wedding anymore. I've said this whole time that we should just hop a plane to Vegas and get hitched there. But, we have already put a deposit down on a photographer and that is non-refundable, I can't justify throwing away $600. What should I do? I don't even know what to say to him. I'm not even a little upset about not having a wedding, I just want to be married to him, but I hate seeing him so upset about all of this.
I guess I just needed to vent. But I'll take any advice you have to offer.

Re: wedding planning woes

  • you could see if your photographer will allow that deposit to be put towards a photo shoot? maybe engagement shoot? even if you werent going to have one originally, its better to spend a little more than to lose out completely. or if someone else you know would "take it over" for some other reason? talk to your photographer and see what your options are. some are more flexible than others.
  • Weddings can be expensive, cheap, or somewhere in between. The largest expenses are usually the things that many people have a large control over: venue, food, alcohol, all driven by number of guests. If you put down a $600 deposit on a photographer, that's a lot of money to tie up with just a photographer. I'd do what heatherjoy1187 above recommends, see if you can get something else done with that money. 

    No one says you HAVE to have a big reception and invite a lot of people. We had 73 people when we married in August 2011, fabulous food from Holiday Market, and all of it under $6000 for the reception. Photographer was a husband of a friend who charged $700, did photography as a hobby. I got my reception dress from Alessandra's bridal at a demo sale, and made my ceremony dress and veil. 

    There is nothing wrong with a Vegas marriage, especially if you want to save for a family & a house. 

    Read the "vendor" tab at the top of the Detroit page. There are countless recommendations with grades and prices from brides over the past 4 years. 
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