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Customs and Traditions

How to honor special people at my party after the elopement?

So my mom is very supportive of our decision to go away by ourselves to get married, as is my twin brother and very close girlfriends. However I know that my mom wants to be "acknowledged" at the party (even though she doesn't say so) and I would like to do something non cheesy for my close girlfriends (friendships that are 20years long). There will be people at our party that have never met my mom or twin brother and many friends that have never met either. What are some ways I can acknowledge my mom and twin during the party (I don't like the idea of standing up and introducing them....)? What are ways I can celebrate my friendships since they will not be "bridesmaids"? Thanks everyone!!

Re: How to honor special people at my party after the elopement?

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Personally I wouldn't acknowledged anyone specifically at your party.  I would do a general toast and thank everyone for coming, blah, blah, blah.  But then I would write separate cards to your Mom, brother and friends that tell them how much they mean to you and that their support has been wonderful etc. 

  • Is your mother hosting the party?  If she is, then you thank her with a toast.  Otherwise, she is being pushy and an AW.  If your mother is hosting, then her name goes on the invitation.  Your Mom is confusing a party with a wedding reception.
    I suggest that the wedding announcements be sent in your parents' name.  That should please her.

    Mr. and Mrs. John Bridesparents
    announce the marriage of their daughter
    Bride's First Middle
    to
    Mr. Groom's Full Namme
    Date of ceremony
    City, State
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • So my mom is very supportive of our decision to go away by ourselves to get married, as is my twin brother and very close girlfriends. However I know that my mom wants to be "acknowledged" at the party (even though she doesn't say so) and I would like to do something non cheesy for my close girlfriends (friendships that are 20years long). There will be people at our party that have never met my mom or twin brother and many friends that have never met either. What are some ways I can acknowledge my mom and twin during the party (I don't like the idea of standing up and introducing them....)? What are ways I can celebrate my friendships since they will not be "bridesmaids"? Thanks everyone!!
    I think you just make a general toast to everyone "thanks for coming and thanks to our families who have supported us." 

    As for your friends, I'd say you just get good pictures with them and party away with them.

    There will be tons of people at our wedding who will have never met my siblings or parents before, but we wont really be introducing them. It's not a big deal. 
    image
    [Deleted User]
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I would honor my mother by giving a toast/speech thanking her for the event (assuming she's helping to host) or thanking her for her roll and all that.

    For friends, maybe a corsage.  I would make a point of doing special photos with them at the event.  
  • I think a toast is great and for your mom (and maybe in laws too) what about still getting them flowers for the day. Doesn't have to be anything fancy, but a nice coursage or boutinerre will help her to stand out as someone important.
  • LondonLisaLondonLisa London, UK member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I would be careful about doing this special designation for too many people. I understand giving a toast to your mother or having her and maybe 1-2 other people having corsages, but once it starts to get bigger (including a friend subgroup), it becomes almost tiered guests with VIPs and others. If I was invited to a party of 40 people and 10 had special designation and were wearing corsages, I would feel a bit second class, especially because this isn't a wedding, but just a party. 

    You can celebrate their friendships by taking them out or cooking them dinner and saying how much they mean to you. You can even write a letter to each of them saying their importance in your life. When you get to public displays of appreciating some friends over others at a party, there can be hurt feelings. It doesn't need to be public to be meaningful. 

    I know you say its hard since they would have been in your wedding party, but that is the decision you made when you eloped.
    MairePoppy
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