I thought all of my lurking had paid off (so far it has!) until my fiance threw me for a loop today. We are getting married in July, and just sent out invitations. We have a while before the seating chart has to be done, but we started planning out the room, and where we wanted to put things like the card box, cake, sparklers, etc. We plan on having a sweetheart table.
As we started to put the room together, my fiance pointed to a corner of the room and said that would be a good place to put the fallen soldier table. It would be in the corner of the reception room, directly to the right right of our sweetheart table if you are looking at the table. I've never seen one before at a wedding, but I have seen them at other reception-like occasions.
My fiance is currently active duty Air Force who served two tours in Iraq with the Army before he changed branches and went into the Air Force. While he was deployed, his best friend was killed while they were under attack, and he wanted to honor him at the ceremony. I think the idea is beautiful, and he wanted to keep a sign on the table that explains what the table symbolizes.
My question is, is this appropriate? The research I've found says it can be done at weddings, but I wanted to get some input. Will people see it as inappropriate?
ETA: Other than the sign, he does not want to have it announced or brought to anyone's attention. He simply wants to print the sign that explains the meaning, and leave it there in the corner.
Re: Fallen Soldier Table at Wedding
I would ask your FI if there is a way to honor his friend that is more private, such as a particular song that could be incorporated into your playlist, or a special reading or Bible verse you could use, or if FI could carry his friend's picture or another token in his pocket. I think honoring his friend is important and should be done, but I do think that memorials at weddings, regardless of the honoree, are best done privately and/or subtly.
What does your Fi hope the affect will have on his guests? Sadness? Anger? These are the sort of emotions people feel when viewing something like a war memorial. Is this in line with what you both want on your wedding day?
Furthermore, and I'm sure I can't be the first person who has thought this, if I was his dead friend, there is no way in hell I'd want that type of attention at my best friend's wedding. I would want you both focusing on your life together as husband and wife and the many adventures you two will have together... why would I want any focus on me? Especially a whole memorial table? Nope, never. Surely you can find a better use of that corner space.
*Formerly ctexasgurl26 and mrsridings061513*
Baby William born June 11, 2014 Weighing 6 lbs 5 oz and 17.5 inches long
- I'm familiar with the table and script that goes with it having been to numerous military events.
*Formerly ctexasgurl26 and mrsridings061513*
Baby William born June 11, 2014 Weighing 6 lbs 5 oz and 17.5 inches long
If Fi wants to honor his friend in some way, there are plenty of ways to do it. I personally would never dream of doing it this way and if OP doesn't want to, then she shouldn't have to, either. Surely there is another way they can both appreciate.
I think the table would be a bit much for a wedding.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."