Two best men

Marianpingree

What does anyone think about the idea of having two best men? My finance can't decide between his brother (out of obligation) and his best friend (because that's who he really wants) to fill the roll. His mother is placing a lot of stressful pressure on him to pick his brother. I told him to have them split the duties and title them both the best men! Has anyone else done or seen this before?

[Deleted User]

There aren't any duties except to show up on time and sober in the selected apparel, so whatever.  Have two, choose one, or have them both just be groomsmen.

CC0805

Have both.  I'm having two MOH's (Matron, my best friend, and Maid, my sister) and FI is having to Best Men.  His cousin as Best Man, and his best friend as the Best E-Man (his nickname growing up was E, so he liked the play on words)

[Deleted User]

My FI has two brothers that he doesn't want to choose between so he has said he's just going to have them both be Best Man. I told him it was his side of the party so didn't care if they both were or neither were, if he had a best man or didn't - it's w.e he chooses. 

AmyBB2010

My fiancé is having 2 best men. I have a matron and maid of honor, so he wanted 2 best men (2 very close friends of his. He wants to just call all of the groomsmen his "best men" since his friends mean a lot to him. I see no problem with 2 best men though.  

climbingsingle

I've seen weddings that had two best men before.

OliveOilsMom

Marianpingree said:

What does anyone think about the idea of having two best men? My finance can't decide between his brother (out of obligation) and his best friend (because that's who he really wants) to fill the roll. His mother is placing a lot of stressful pressure on him to pick his brother. I told him to have them split the duties and title them both the best men! Has anyone else done or seen this before?

There is nothing wrong with having two Best Men.  I have been in a wedding where there were two.  But the bigger issue is that it sounds like your FI doesn't want his brother to be a Best Man.  So he needs to suck it up and tell his mom to back off, the WP is his decision to make.  If he wants his brother as a GM, then he should be asked to do that.  Just because someone is a sibling doesn't automatically give them top billing in a WP.

clarke10

Having two best men is fine. My FH is doing this because he has two best friends.

What duties would they be splitting?

princessleia22

I'm having two MOH's (my sister & best friend/sister-in-law), so I don't see why you can't have two Best Men.  And there really aren't any required duties except getting outfits and showing up. My sister & SIL get along really well, so they did great at coordinating dress shopping and such. But, they didn't really have to coordinate on anything else. We decided not to do a bachelorette party, but if we had, either one of them could have offered to host or they could have chosen to host together.

I agree that if FI really want to just have his friend, he should push back with mom and just have brother as groomsman.  You shouldn't be forced to choose wedding party because of pressure. But, I don't know his family dynamics, and sometimes it may be easier to just comply than start a battle over it.

shelikespink

My fiance has two best men. I was trying to convince him to pick one - he still will need to choose one to sign our wedding documents! He can only pick one witness for our legal papers so he will have to figure that out.