What is with the stereotypical ugly bridesmaid dresses?

JennyColada

Like, I just don't get it. One of my friends (it's her anniversary today, so she re-posted her wedding pictures) opted for sage green satin ball gowns. Another friend did light blue tea-length dresses with orange tulle (and she even was overheard saying "and the best part is that you can wear them again!").

What goes through these girls' minds to even think things like that?!

hellohkb

I was literally just wondering this, because a friend just pinned a few bridesmaid dresses to her wedding pinterest board. Hers are going to be brown with a green sash (Yikes!). Most bridesmaid dresses are absolutely hideous. I'm letting the bridesmaids pick their own dresses.

I'm laughing at the bride who claimed the blue with orange tulle bridesmaid dress can be worn again.

JennyColada

hellokellybean said:

I'm laughing at the bride who claimed the blue with orange tulle bridesmaid dress can be worn again.

Yea, that was fun.

I don't know why more brides don't 1. make sensible dress choices. 2. allow BMs to pick their own dress based on guidelines. It just seems like the best option. But I'm totally not a perfectionist and don't really have a wedding "vision".

Grabows14

I really liked my bridesmaids dresses and I want to wear them to formal functions, but whenever I get the chance; I just wear a LBD. oh well

PrincessOfHavoc

I swear it's to make the bride be the prettiest in the room. But the tragic dresses get way more notice. Ask my clothing clueless fiance or brother what the bridesmaids wore at brother's wedding to fiance's sister - and that dress was in the bathroom closet for 7 weeks so fiance saw it often - and brother goes "Purple? No green. Or red." with fiance going "Was that your cream dress? I know it was short because your legs were hot in it." Dress was gray with navy sash and floor length. Ask them about the train wreck of a cousin's was - they both go safety cone orange with radioactive flowers and loosely sewn on flowers on your butt that made a run for freedom while walking up the aisle.

Plus, it seems rude to treat friends and family that way.

MOH is wearing whatever black dress she wants that's knee or tea length. Why should I care more than that? She just needs to show up on time, in black dress and either not hungover or willing to fake it even if that's via hair of the dog.

flyingfoxes

I like my bridesmaids dresses, but realistically?  They look like bridesmaids dresses - they won't get worn again.

Bubblegum5586

I had my BMs choose theirs (with the guidelines of color fabric and length) one BM tried to wear hers to an event before the wedding and before she even asked me if that was ok, I guess a few of her other friends shot that down, but then she ended up wearing it 2 weeks after my wedding as a guest at another wedding. I know my sister wants to wear hers again, but where she was the MOH at my wedding she's waiting to get invited to a wedding where there was really no one from mine (like a friend or on her BF's side). No idea about the other girls, but I was thinking of asking to borrow one of their dresses that I really liked for when I get invited to a wedding where there will be minimal overlapping guests from ours.

ElcaB

I dislike most typical BM dresses, but I especially cringe when the bride chooses a hideous color. When the fuck am I ever going to wear a lime green satin cocktail dress???

climbingsingle

I have never worn a bridesmaid dress again. I've been in 7 weddings. 

I really don't get brides that choose dresses like that. Fuck your vision. Let your friends pick out their own dresses. 

My MOH chose a Ralph Lauren dress from Macy's. It looks amazing on her and she doesn't even need to do alterations. 

VulgarGirl

This is why we told our girls black and knee-length...ish. If it isn't exactly knee length no big thing, do what you feel comfortable with. 

I have a floor length green apple colored dress that the bride said "You can wear it again! For like Christmas parties!" I have yet to wear this damn thing again. And she picked them after being stuck in two horrible, I'll never wear them again dresses. Luckily they were on sale when we bought them. Though they were designed for people at least 6' tall. Seriously, I'm 5.5' (this is how you know I'm short, I count half an inch), they had to do so much hemming on mine. But the color actually worked on me, so while I haven't worn it again it wasn't too bad.

FI has a burnt orange number. There's some flower looking...stuff on it. It looked bad on all of them. Seriously, no one could pull off this color. We still have it. I think we should use it at some kind of Halloween costume. Maybe a sexy prisoner deal or something. Or just splatter it with blood. It'd probably look better that way.

jdluvr06

I've been lucky. I only have one bridesmaids dress that I haven't worn again. It was this horrid lilac dress with a big flower on it. Most of the weddings I've been in the bride told us to pick a dress and most of the time it has been pick a black dress. That is what I'm having my BMs do. Pick a black dress.

Peaseblossom55

I've never reworn a bridesmaids dress I have about six sitting in my closet.  There are some that are really pretty I would consider wearing again but I think they may look too much like I'm rewearing a bridesmaids dress. 

When we went shopping for BM dresses for my wedding I said I wanted blush pink and let them choose the dress and the fabric.  I even said they didn't have to all be the same either.  They all chose the same one.  I really don't expect them to ever wear the dress again though....

Cookie Pusher

I don't understand why anyone wants to put the bridesmaids in ugly dresses. Who wants to look at those pictures for the rest of their lives?! My BMs couldn't find anything they liked in matching shades of blue (they wanted the same color since it was just the two of them, they just couldn't agree on style). I ended up going to Macy's and picking up several dresses in both their sizes for them to try - they both liked the same one! It's a cute, everyday type dress that work appropriate, and they both said they liked the dress because they will wear them again. They'll be happy, I'll be happy, and I'll have nice looking pictures where everyone is smiling!

chibiyui

I rewore the bridesmaids dress for my sisters wedding to prom. I did not rewear the bridesmaids dress for my best friends wedding, and ended up donating it. I am hoping my bridesmaids can wear theirs again, but realize it is unlikely. 

In hindsight, I would have just told them green, knee length and go, but everything still looked nice and they were all in their budget.

adverb1129

I have one bridesmaid dress in my closet for my close friend's wedding two years ago.  It isn't a bad little dress- chocolate brown, silk shantung, cocktail dress.  But I never ever wear brown and the dress has a certain plainness and lack of decoration that screams "bridesmaid!" which makes it pretty hard to wear again.  I've lost weight since that wedding so I'll probably donate it to a thrift shop; there's no way I'm spending money on alterations for it.

For my wedding I gave my bridesmaids a color and a length and then just let them pick.  They still ended up buying from David's Bridal to make things easier.  I thought the dresses they picked were pretty re-wearable but I wouldn't be surprised if they end up being given away.

Inkdancer

With the one wedding I was in, it wasn't really the dress that was the problem... it was the inexperienced seamstress. The MOG made our dresses, and since she didn't know how to do ruching, she pleated the sides... which resulted in kangaroo pouches on everyone. It was pretty bad. Had the dress been made to the pattern, it would have been gorgeous.

thisismynickname2

a) Many BM dresses are boring because they're just so plain, and they're made to flatter the most body types--- so every wedding party is practically interchangeable.

b) Many BM dresses are made of fabric that should never be made in a specific color. Shiny blue = 80's tacky. 

c) Bridal parties need to take photos with flash in the dresses before purchasing. Maybe then, sateen/satin and taffeta would never happen.

d) For the love of all that is holy, respect your friends.  If I see one more "womanly" figure in a shiny purple fabric, tight dress, I will get hungry for grapes and eat them along side a big bowl of pity.  

clueclaw.defunct635777689035314155

One of the BM dresses I wore was kind of cute, but didn't look that great on me because I am busty. It looked ok on the other girls.

There was a woman in the room we were waiting in before the ceremony, who was saying how the dresses looked great on everyone. I was thinking, "are we seeing the same dress?"

That dress was ruined, because I got about 10 glasses of champagne spilt on me at the reception. I was a poor college student, who was about to spend money on dry cleaning for an ill fitting dress.

spara0038

2 things:

1. I think some brides can get really hung up about a particular theme without considering what they're making their bridesmaids wear, so they're trying to pick a colour not make their brides look good.

2. (probably most likely) Some brides are a little insecure and choose intentionally bad dresses to make the bride look better. My fiance's brother got married a month ago and the dresses were dreadful. They had this awful ruching that made all of the girls look pregnant! But, then again, I've heard rumors that she's very publicly confident/privately insecure, so it made sense that she would do that.

HaileyDancingbear

I'm never really sure whether they just have really bad taste and think their bridesmaids ended up with pretty dresses, or just want the bridesmaids to look less attractive so they don't upstage the bride. 

I mentioned something BM related to FI the other day and he goes "You're not gonna do that annoying power play thing where you force everyone to wear ugly dresses, right?" I cracked up and told him I'm just choosing a color and letting them wear whatever they want.  And that color may end up being black to make it even easier.

PrincessOfHavoc

The Orange tragedy was turned into a zombie walk costume. Cousin saw a picture and was furious. Her own mother thought the zombie costume was the only semi appropriate location and even then it was still damn ugly. The gray and navy was lovely but not what I really wear. Lovely on me, but not me. So I donated it to a prom sale deal. The young lady sent a picture and it was perfect for her and she had it hemmed shorter for a grown up party dress. Various other ones have gone to sales or costumes. None have been particularly horrid, but most have been long and I don't like long dresses much on me.

phira

This is actually why I'm just not on board with having any kind of dress requirements beyond maybe length and MAYBE a color family. Because it just seems kind of cruel to me to ask people to pay for and wear in photos a dress that they do not love and will never wear again.

beethery

I had been perusing for a cocktail dress for another event, when I happened upon a designer whose pieces I really liked. I sent some links to my BMs, asked what they thought, and they both leaned toward one in particular. They both agreed that they liked a grey version of the dress, so I went ahead and bought them. Done and done.

I have no idea if they would ever wear the dresses again, that's up to them. Would I be outraged if they didn't? Nope! I like the dress and ended up buying the navy version for the event I was originally buying a dress for.

LadyMillil

I've never been a BM so I don't have any dresses hanging around. I had 2 BMs. One is reusing her dress as MOH in another wedding. Her sister picked the exact same colour and dress I did. The other BM may be able to use her dress as a BM dress for another wedding as well. The dress is floor length and it will depend if it looks ok shortened to knee length. I guess plum is a very popular colour this year.

lovesclimbing

The dresses for my wedding were sewn by my mom.  Two of three have worn them again. (The third liked the dress, but hasn't worn it again because mom took it in too much and she could barely breath.)

I was just the MOH in my sister's wedding. Again, dresses sewn by my mom and sister.  they are GORGEOUS! And I can't wait for an opportunity to wear it again. (It's a little too fancy for church, so I'll have to wait for a nice dinner out or an event of some sort.)

Sewing your own for the win!

wandajune6

MagicInk said:

This is why we told our girls black and knee-length...ish. If it isn't exactly knee length no big thing, do what you feel comfortable with. 

I have a floor length green apple colored dress that the bride said "You can wear it again! For like Christmas parties!" I have yet to wear this damn thing again. And she picked them after being stuck in two horrible, I'll never wear them again dresses. Luckily they were on sale when we bought them. Though they were designed for people at least 6' tall. Seriously, I'm 5.5' (this is how you know I'm short, I count half an inch), they had to do so much hemming on mine. But the color actually worked on me, so while I haven't worn it again it wasn't too bad.

FI has a burnt orange number. There's some flower looking...stuff on it. It looked bad on all of them. Seriously, no one could pull off this color. We still have it. I think we should use it at some kind of Halloween costume. Maybe a sexy prisoner deal or something. Or just splatter it with blood. It'd probably look better that way.

That's what I told my ladies. They're all thinking that I've got stronger feelings about dresses than I do!

I have a black dress that I wore in another wedding that I kept hearing I could wear again. Sadly, it just screamed of bridesmaid dress. Although, ironically, I think one of my BMs will end up wearing it!

VulgarGirl

wandajune6 said:

show previous quotes

MagicInk said:

This is why we told our girls black and knee-length...ish. If it isn't exactly knee length no big thing, do what you feel comfortable with. 

I have a floor length green apple colored dress that the bride said "You can wear it again! For like Christmas parties!" I have yet to wear this damn thing again. And she picked them after being stuck in two horrible, I'll never wear them again dresses. Luckily they were on sale when we bought them. Though they were designed for people at least 6' tall. Seriously, I'm 5.5' (this is how you know I'm short, I count half an inch), they had to do so much hemming on mine. But the color actually worked on me, so while I haven't worn it again it wasn't too bad.

FI has a burnt orange number. There's some flower looking...stuff on it. It looked bad on all of them. Seriously, no one could pull off this color. We still have it. I think we should use it at some kind of Halloween costume. Maybe a sexy prisoner deal or something. Or just splatter it with blood. It'd probably look better that way.

That's what I told my ladies. They're all thinking that I've got stronger feelings about dresses than I do!

I have a black dress that I wore in another wedding that I kept hearing I could wear again. Sadly, it just screamed of bridesmaid dress. Although, ironically, I think one of my BMs will end up wearing it!

One of my girls said "Don't you want us to get your style input?" then I reminded her I dress like a 5 year old on a sugar high crossed with a teenager from Hot Topic and a drag queen, did she really want me to pick out her dress? She decided she trusted her own style just fine.

hlpopper

Oh god, I can't even begin to explain how much I hate ugly bridesmaids dresses. I feel that if the bridesmaids don't look fabulous, the bride looks less fabulous. My MOH and I are making the BM dresses which are infinity dresses. (Link, because I'm not tech savvy and can't link: http://events.battlegroundcc.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/infinity-dress.jpg ) We are doing this awesome dress in black. We chose this dress as it can be worn an, where it gets its name from, infinite different ways which means they can wear it again. That and the girls all have different body types and comfort zones so it gives them the ability to wear a dress that they look and feel beautiful in and that they will want to wear again. Like I said, if the BMs aren't beautiful, it detracts from the bride plus why force them to spend THEIR money on a dress that makes them want to gag?

sarahonlife

I told my sister that since there were no other bridesmaids, she could pick ANY dress she liked in any color and I would buy it for her. Sent her a link to Modcloth and told her to look around her favorite stores. This was her chance to get a dress she'd been wanting! So she went to David's Bridal and picked a cute, but very much stereotypical satin bridesmaid dress. When I checked before ordering to make sure it's what she wanted, she said "well I want everyone to know I'm a bridesmaid!"

thisismynickname2

sarahonlife said:

I told my sister that since there were no other bridesmaids, she could pick ANY dress she liked in any color and I would buy it for her. Sent her a link to Modcloth and told her to look around her favorite stores. This was her chance to get a dress she'd been wanting! So she went to David's Bridal and picked a cute, but very much stereotypical satin bridesmaid dress. When I checked before ordering to make sure it's what she wanted, she said "well I want everyone to know I'm a bridesmaid!"

I'm doing the whole "pick a knee-length black dress and be done with it" thing and have gotten nothing but push-back (clashing blacks, pictures looking weird, you name it). It's been super annoying.  What you've said here about wanting to stand out as a bridesmaid just might actually be why my BM's are so irritating with this whole thing. Food for thought. 

The whole "standing up NEXT TO ME" aspect isn't good enough?

manateehugger

I despise the huge giant satin sash. Who buys themselves an elegant cocktail dress with a giant off-colored sash sewn onto it?!