I need major input...please help!

brittanyy2131

My fiance and myself are getting married in a small church ceremony this month, my kids immediate family and our pastor, thats it! We want to glorify our marriage in God's house since we have decided to accept Christ as our Savior it's only right to quit living in sin. However we have already been planning our big wedding for the same day next year (which we are paying for which is why we can't move it up). How do we word our invitations? Do we use our second wedding as a vow renewal or do we continue as if it is our first wedding? Everyone I know has a biased opinion I need help from people who don't know me. Please help!

hlvonb

brittanyy2131 said:

My fiance and myself are getting married in a small church ceremony this month, my kids immediate family and our pastor, thats it! We want to glorify our marriage in God's house since we have decided to accept Christ as our Savior it's only right to quit living in sin. However we have already been planning our big wedding for the same day next year (which we are paying for which is why we can't move it up). How do we word our invitations? Do we use our second wedding as a vow renewal or do we continue as if it is our first wedding? Everyone I know has a biased opinion I need help from people who don't know me. Please help!

If you're getting married now before the big wedding then the big wedding should be a vow renewal NOT another wedding. 

Since you don't want to wait or move it up, Make the invites as a wedding invite for the one you're having with immediate family and the one later is a vow renewal.

QueerFemme

brittanyy2131 said:

My fiance and myself are getting married in a small church ceremony this month, my kids immediate family and our pastor, thats it! We want to glorify our marriage in God's house since we have decided to accept Christ as our Savior it's only right to quit living in sin. However we have already been planning our big wedding for the same day next year (which we are paying for which is why we can't move it up). How do we word our invitations? Do we use our second wedding as a vow renewal or do we continue as if it is our first wedding? Everyone I know has a biased opinion I need help from people who don't know me. Please help!

You get one wedding.  You are choosing to get married now for your religious reasons, which is fine. But, there is no reason to have a re-do next year.  You can certainly host a kick ass party next year, but having a vow renewal after only one year of marriage is really silly. 

You should read the "PPD" thread on the etiquette board.  Just because you are getting married now for religious reasons, doesn't make your situation unique.

photokitty

It is not a second wedding. You can't have a second wedding without getting divorced. You can have a vow renewal, but that does not include a bridal party or the typical trappings of a wedding.

I recommend hosting what you can afford now, or just have a party to celebrate your first anniversary. You also have the option of not living in sin until you can have the wedding you want, when you can afford it in a tear. It's a decision only you can make, but if you get married this month you can't have a wedding next year.

Having a redo wedding (or PPD as they are referred to on here) will not go over well with a lot of people. If some of your friends are already telling you that don't think you should do this, you can bet there are many more who don't want to say it to your face. Sorry.

Knottie35027473

@photokitty... not everyone getting married a second time is divorced... some people's husbands (and wives) do pass away... just saying!  Never thought I'd be getting married a second time and here I am.

Jells2dot0

Knottie35027473 said:

@photokitty... not everyone getting married a second time is divorced... some people's husbands (and wives) do pass away... just saying!  Never thought I'd be getting married a second time and here I am.

@photokitty was referring to a second wedding to the same person. Obviously people lose their SOs, which is devastating, and choose to remarry. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with that. 

photokitty

Jells2dot0 said:

show previous quotes

Knottie35027473 said:

@photokitty... not everyone getting married a second time is divorced... some people's husbands (and wives) do pass away... just saying!  Never thought I'd be getting married a second time and here I am.

@photokitty was referring to a second wedding to the same person. Obviously people lose their SOs, which is devastating, and choose to remarry. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with that. 

My post was written specifically to the OP - that's why I said "You can't" bc she can't have a second wedding to the same man without a divorce - which we have seen on this board.

I of course understand that people have second weddings due not only to divorce, but also sadly due to the passing of a spouse. I did not mean to offend you, Knottie35027473, I was just speaking directly to the OP. GL!