First time you said the scary 3 words?

wandajune6

The previous posts made me think of this question: how did you first tell your FI/spouse/partner/etc. you loved them? (A little cheesy but always a sweet thought!)

I told FI I loved him in the middle of one of our first arguments. He did something idiot and unsafe and I yelled at him that I loved him too much to watch him do something that stupid. He apologized and told me he loved me too. It wasn't the most romantic exchange but it clearly meant a lot.

Your turn!

sophhabobopha

I honestly don't remember! We've just kind of been saying it since we started dating, haha!

natswild

I told my FI I loved him the night after he'd been in a very bad car accident, one which he must have had a dozen golden horse shoes up his ass, because it should have killed him, and he got away with whiplash, a broken nose, and many bruises. We'd been together a year and a half at that point.

JennyColada

We were in bed cuddling (JUST cuddling!) and he nuzzled his face into my neck and said "I love you." and I said it back.

It was very comfortable with not a lot of bells and whistles, just like our proposal and so totally us.

But it was, like, in our first week of being together.

JCbride2015

We said it 6 months into dating.  We were in high school and we had started fooling around but not actually had sex yet.  I initiated a conversation about sex, past partners, etc.  Fi said he wanted to wait because of a bad past experience (and I think because we were young, especially me, but he didn't say that).  Then at the end of the conversation he started getting all weird and finally spit out that he loved me.  I said it back right away.  It was sort of our first major relationship conversation, like where is this going?  So I think even though it wasn't a really romantic moment it made sense.

bethsmiles

I said it about 4 months into our relationship, SO said it 2 months after - which I realize is a little unconventional but it means a lot to me that he refused to say it just because I did and wanted to wait until he was sure that he meant it.

I don't think anything special was happening when either of us said it though.

climbingsingle

FI said it first. It was about a month in. Unfortunately we'd been out drinking earlier, so my memory is a little hazy. But we were at my apartment and he said it and I said it right back. 

Cookie Pusher

He said it first. We were hanging out in one of our dorm rooms (his, maybe?), just laying on the bed listening to music. He just said it like it was no big thing. lol

JCbride2015

@Cookie Pusher ever since you changed your avatar and siggy I'm like, "I don't know who this person is!!!" I love both, however. Especially Inigo. That meme needs to get trotted out far more often around these parts.

phira

I felt love about 3-4 months in but was determined to wait for him to say it first. I'm aaaaalways the one who says it first in relationships, and I had felt really jaded that past boyfriends hadn't meant it and had just said it in response.

However, 5 months in, no "I love you," and we had just signed a lease on an apartment to move in together. In Boston, you often have to sign a lease moooonths in advance of moving, so this was about 4-5 months before we'd be living together. But I still felt like it was really stupid to move in with a partner when NEITHER of us knew if the other one loved them.

So a few weeks later, I told him, and said I felt weird that we'd signed the lease without sharing those feelings. And he didn't say it back because he wasn't ready. I was really disappointed.

About a month later, we got into a huuuuge fight, and as we were finally calming down so we could make up and end the fight, he said, "It's okay. We're having a fight, but it's clear that we're upset over this because we love each other, and we just want to work through it." So the fight ended pretty quickly and I was all, "Oh so you loooooooove me?" and teasing him.

Cookie Pusher

@JCbride2015 Yea, I was kind of feeling the need for a change. Too many speshul snowflakes out there using their dollar words incorrectly - much easier to have Inigo all the time! And my sig was just me finding something close enough to declaring me Queen of The Knot, demanding puppy gifs as tribute to my authority. haha

RebeccaB88

My ex, a couple weeks in. He said it first, but I had no trouble immediately saying it back to him. We were just in bed snuggling.  He started screwing someone else a few weeks later, that I didn't know about. But he never stopped saying it to me. 

ShallowSeas

I don't remember how it happened. I know FI said it though very early in our relationship. We were dating for 2 months and then during the third month of dating decided to make it official and give each other 'boyfriend/girlfriend' titles, but he first told me while we were still dating.

I'll have to ask him and see if he remembers when we first said it.

Peaseblossom55

I don't really remember, it was about 2 1/2 montha fter dating, FI (BF at the time send me roses because I was working NYE and he signed it love ) it was the first time he had used that word.  I believe shortly there after we began to say it but sadly I don't remember the first time.....

ShesSoCold

I'm not as slutty as this sounds, but my high school boyfriend and I are still really good friends and my FI was his best friend. HS BF did not approve of FI and I being together so we sneaked around for like 5 months before HS BF found out and got pissed. FI broke up with me. Then a month later he said "screw this guy - I want to be with you" and we got back together. He said he loved me like a week later.

Before that though, he was afraid to tell me he loved me so he'd say "I'm infatuated with you". It was adorable. 

Edited because words are hard. 

Blergbot

So technically FI said it first. We were...um...having the sex and I wasn't sure if I had heard him correctly. Also, as it was in the heat of the moment, I figured I wouldn't hold him to that, so I didn't say anything.

Cut to MONTHS later and I'm seriously going bananas. Like every time we had a sweet moment together I be saying in my head "I love you! Tell me you love me! Say it! Say it now!" But he didn't. I was so scared to put myself out there, because here I was, 31 years old, I had never had a relationship last longer than six months, I knew pretty much right away that I was in love with this guy, but I felt like at any moment it could all come crashing down...because they all had. 

Anyway, it was New Year's Eve and we spent the night at my place drinking champagne and watching a movie. Then we...um...had the sex. And we were lying in bed and I was saying it in my head again, and then I was just like, fuck it! So I said it. He was quiet for a second or two, which seemed like forever, and then he said, "Yeah, I love you, too. I guess I felt it went without saying." And I'm all like, "It never goes without saying!" Pretty sure that was just code for, " I was too scared to say it first."

So then later he's like, remember that time when I told you I loved you during sex?" And I was all like, "Yeah, actually!" Anyway, now we say it all the time and it's no problem.

flyingfoxes

FI put it on flowers he sent me for Valentine's Day, which was just short of 2 months into dating. I told him that I wasn't ready to say it back, but that he shouldn't think I wasn't heading that direction, because I was, I just wasn't ready that quickly. He told me much later that he put it on the card because he was scared to say it in person.

FiancB

I said it first but actually don't really remember how or why haha. 

Actually I'm pretty sure he said it about a month in when we were in the middle of hanky panky but I wasn't sure so I sort of ignored it and it was never brought up again. lol. But I said it in another month. I was in love at that point but it was awkward to be all "um, did you say what I think you said?"

NowIamMrsKlein

I had a feeling that he was going to say it during our first planned 'vacation' together (few days camping in the mountains). We had only been dating just over 2 months, and at 25 I had never been in a serious relationship before so I was getting a little freaked out by how fast things were moving.

A week before the trip I had even told my best friend that I thought he was going to say it and how I didn't know what I was going to do or how to respond, because having never been in love I didn't know if I was! 

2 days before the trip he got a phone call from work telling him that he had received a promotion (he's an airline pilot. He was going from a first officer to a Captain). But the promotion required him to move to another province (yay Canada!), a 7 hour drive away from where we currently lived. It was after that phone call that I realized that I did, in fact, love him because it never crossed my mind that this would end the relationship, or that i should cut my losses. I was devastated but immediately was concocting a plan on how to make it work!

So when the moment came while camping and he told me he loved me, I said it back. 

1.5 years of long distance and seeing each other 4 days a month, he finally got a job in a city where I could find work and we moved across the country together, 4 months after that were engaged, and now planning our wedding!

buddysmom80

FI said it first. We were dating for five months at that point and were on vacation together in Mexico. The night before, before we went to bed he said "I think I'm falling hard for you" and I didn't really think about it. The next day we were on the beach and we were talking about something and he goes "well, it's because I love you". It took me a minute to say it back, but I did and then he said "I'm going to go get lunch now" and went to the snack bar. To this day we still laugh about the story because it's so "us".

loveislouder

Mine said it 2 days in (not kidding). I had just fallen on my face after tripping over my own feet (I'm graceful) and I was like, "omg I'm such a klutz" and he was like "I love you for it." And I was like.... uhh... and hes like "I love you, okay? Deal with it." It was adorable.

jdluvr06

FI said it first during a fight. Not the most romantic story but it is funny. I can't remember exactly what the fight was about or his exact words but it was something along the lines of "you're lucky I love you so damn much because otherwise I'd want to strangle you". We were about a year in at that point.

chibiyui

H said it first. We were on vacation in Disney (like, 3 months after our first date. H moves fast) and we were waiting for the fireworks in Epcot and he pulled me into his arms and told me he looked me. I thought about it for a few minutes and told him I loved him too.

theartistformerlyknownas

Ours was another quiet, snuggled up cuddling in bed moment like JennyColada's... I could tell that he was super nervous and trying to work up the courage to say it, so I sort of just told him "it's ok, go ahead." He pulled me in really tight next to him and whispered it to me. It was adorable. I said it right back.

Artemischief

FI said it first, a few times.  About a week into dating he said that he thought he was falling in love with me. I didn't respond.

Then, about a month later he officially said "I love you," to which I replied, "really? Because I love you too." (I don't do very well when put on the spot, heck I almost punched him when he proposed!)

A few months later he told me he was lying when he said that he thought he was falling in love with me. My heart sank, but he quickly added, "it was a lie because I already knew I was deeply in love with you."

Inkdancer

I said it first, 6 days after we met. We had been dating for less than three days. FI felt that it was very important to let me know that he'd been going through some major depression, and he didn't want me taking on his baggage blind. So we were having a very intense discussion, both revealing a lot of very personal things, and he was terrified I'd reject him then and there but he wanted to be honest with me. I took his hands and told him I loved him, and I understood, and it wouldn't change how I felt.

It took him about a month to say it back to me.

SapphireCounselor

My DH said, "I love you," first. We were at Disneyland with some friends and the fireworks had just started. It was one of the most romantic moments! I loved it.

melbelleup

It was a month after we started dating officially, and we were in bed at a Bed and Breakfast in Gettysburg for valentines day. He said it while we were doing it and I said it back. Granted, we started having sex before we were even dating... soooo there's that too.

laurenstlouis

These stories are giving me warm fuzzies!

Mine was decidedly less sober and possibly less coherent. It was at the end of my 21st birthday and I had been going on and on all day (sober at that point) to my best friend about how badly I wanted to tell him I love him, but I was so worried I would scare him off. I have trouble keeping things on the DL when I'm sober, so by the end of the night I was more than ready to get everything off my chest. When we were finally alone that night, I told him how I felt. (Thank you, liquid courage!) Luckily, he said he felt the same way and had felt that way for months before we even became an official couple. It was very Sixteen Candles and sober or not, totally perfect.

lovemyrunner

I said it first.  We had been dating for about 5 months and had been officially bf/gf for about 2 months.  I had been thinking it for at least a month, but I was scared to say it first.  I knew he felt the same, but he had been hurt by past girlfriends so I knew he was going to take his sweet time too.  So one night, in bed he told me "I like you" which he said all the time, and I responded with "I don't think it's 'like' anymore.  I think it's love."  He did not say it back.  My take-away was "Ok, clearly he's not ready yet."  But I wasn't worried 'cause I knew he'd get there.

Valentines Day came the next month, and he didn't say it.  A couple weeks later, I met him at a bar after I got off work and he was wasted.  He drunkenly told me he loved me.  In third person.  And then told me that he would never have said it otherwise because he was too scared.  I took him home so he could sleep it off and elected not to mention it the next day.  A couple weeks later he told me for the first time sober.  He took a long time getting there, but that makes it more precious to me.  For the record, he talked about marrying me before we were even official, but no actual proposal yet.  This boy likes to drive me crazy!

amakayeb

We went on our first date in August, started dating seriously in December, and called each other bf/gf after Valentine's Day. About a month later we went to a dinner auction for a local parochial school (I'm a teacher at another school, he was a pastor 'intern' so we knew a lot of people there). It was our first 'public' date where we introduced each other as BF/GF (and he was so cute doing it!). The table decorations were glass vases with candles on these wooden pillars--they said 'Faith', 'Hope', or 'Love'--and they put them on the silent auction. He bought the one from our table. When we got home, he told me he bought it for three reasons: he wanted to buy something to support the school, he wanted me to always remember how much fun we had that night, and he wanted me to have it as a reminder of him saying something he'd wanted to for a while. I said it right back; I'd been wanting to, but was afraid to say it too early.