Bouquet and Garter toss and Other Traditions

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

Is anyone doing Garter toss and Bouquet Toss?  I'm not sure how many people do this anymore.

Our wedding is super small (44 guests max) and a lot of guests are already married.  Only a handful would participate in these traditions and I feel that draws attention to them they may not want. My friends are shy that way.

FI doesnt want to do a garter toss because it isn't to his taste and he doesn't want to draw attention to the single men either for the same reason that they may feel uncomfortable

I thought about taking my flowers and garter and building a shadowbox to put in your bedroom instead.  I bought the garter on etsy before FI told me he wasn't up to the garter toss.  It's super pretty and I think it would make a lovely keepsake.

I was just curious about others on here and if they were having these traditions or not, or if there were other traditions people are forgoing.  We are also having a first look, since we will have pictures done beforehand so we can join guests for cocktail hour.

Thoughts?

April192002

We're not doing the tosses, as our wedding guests will also be mostly married or in long term relationships. I've heard of giving the bouquet to a grandparent but the only one still living is out of state. I feel it's kinda "wrong", maybe more taboo-ish, for anyone (even new husband) to get all up under the dress in front of people. My friend, who just got married, had a handfull of guests who participated in both, the girls were mostly middle & high school age and the boys were more high school college.

I hate drawing weird attention to myself. The first wedding I went to was right after high school so I stood in the big crowd of single women, not to stick out as an onlooker, and the second I was kinda called out, but having been in a relationship for 2 years and still technically married to my first husband, I easily justified not being in the small heard of women and they moved on...still awkward.

phira

We're not doing tosses. I haven't been to a wedding with either.

hikebikebemerry

We're not doing the tosses, and I have only been to one wedding that had the tosses. We feel that the tosses will really take away from time that we could be spent partying with our guests!

StephJean83

We went to a wedding last summer, and they did the tosses. They called all women and all men vs just the singles because there would have about 3 of each otherwise. We decided to do the tosses and do them with all and definitely no dancing or anything between the guy and girl who catch each.

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

Thanks for the input, guys.  I've been to like 3 weddings in my life and all of them were backyard BBQ style and super informal, so I wasn't sure what to expect.  I honestly don't remember bouquet/garter tosses in any of them.

I wasn't attached to my bouquet and was totally prepared to throw it (we could have ordered a 'tossing' bouquet and a bouquet to keep but I wanted to save money and forgo the tossing one).  But now I'm feeling sentimental and want to do something with it.

KLee17

I've been to both weddings with and weddings without the tosses. I personally don't think anyone notices of they are missing. Personally, I'm uncomfortable doing the garter toss so we are skipping it (as well as the bouquet toss).

Has anyone heard of the warming of the rings? I just heard of this today and it sounds cute. It is meant for smaller ceremonies as the rings are passed to all the guests to hold and grant their well wishes upon. I've never seen this done, but I'm wondering if it comes off as a little boring?

CTYankeeBride

We are not having tosses. At a wedding we went to two weeks ago, I was hauled out into the dance floor by a DJ who said "the ring means nothing, you still filed your taxes single this year!" to me and a few other ladies. No thanks.
We only have a handful of unmarried guests and I'm sure they won't feel like they're missing out if we skip it.

hikebikebemerry

CTYankeeBride said:

We are not having tosses. At a wedding we went to two weeks ago, I was hauled out into the dance floor by a DJ who said "the ring means nothing, you still filed your taxes single this year!" to me and a few other ladies. No thanks. We only have a handful of unmarried guests and I'm sure they won't feel like they're missing out if we skip it.

You. are. fucking. kidding.

I would be furious!

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

CTYankeeBride said:

We are not having tosses. At a wedding we went to two weeks ago, I was hauled out into the dance floor by a DJ who said "the ring means nothing, you still filed your taxes single this year!" to me and a few other ladies. No thanks. We only have a handful of unmarried guests and I'm sure they won't feel like they're missing out if we skip it.

Ugh, what does that even MEAN??  What a jackass.

CTYankeeBride

Yeah, it was ridiculous.  I realize the couple isn't necessarily directly responsible for the DJ saying that but it still wasn't the high point of the evening for any of the four of us collected up by the bride while the DJ was saying that. I don't consider myself to be an overly sensitive person and I wasn't about to make a scene, but it was a pretty shitty thing for anyone to say.

AlliT17

My florist is making a toss bouquet for me from my leftover roses, its actually going to be a group of roses put together with a ribbon and right before I throw I will take off the ribbon and it will separate so hopefully no one gets left out of the toss or at least the kids will get one and at no extra cost to me!