I need help planning a 3-day weekend wedding!!!

ykandi22z

Hi,

Thank you in advance for any suggestions and or feedback. I am throwing a three day couples retreat / wedding commencing on a Friday night and concluding on Sunday after an informal ceremony.

I am not doing any traditional wedding standards (i.e. no bridal party, no center pieces, no programs, no monograms, no favors, no seating at the ceremony. You get the point)

Dilemma, I am doing this intentionally because we are very non-traditional. I don’t want it to be downplayed because it’s not your typical wedding. We want it to be more along the lines of a commitment ceremony than a wedding. But we are actually getting married. We just want to hang out with our friends and family and then have them watch us exchange vows.   We will be providing food, accommodations, and spirits to our guest for the entire weekend. We are registering for gifts because we are spending money on the wedding it’s just being spent on tangible things versus napkins. Lol (monogram napkins are pretty just not for me) The actual ceremony will only be about 15 minutes outside on a cliff over looking Lake Michigan and then I'm planning for guest (30 of our very close family and friends) to return inside the home and enjoy cocktails, tapas buffet, and the wedding cakes (three total different cakes & designs) There will be flowers, candles, and music once everyone returns inside. I don’t want it to seem like our lack of the typical wedding frills as a budget conscious decision. I am just not into all the “frills” of weddings. I appreciate them and find them enjoyable for other people. It’s just not my thing.

How do I convey our wedding vibe to our guest without having to explain why all the frills are not there? I am setting up a website that sets the tone of the weekend which I describe as “A weekend of fellowship and love.” Does this make sense and would you understand it? 

Thanks!

Jelenny

I am confused what do you need help with?

Seems like you have a pretty clear cut idea of your "wedding weekend"

eudell

That makes sense, have you seen offbeatbride.com? 

Wiscisbliss

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_wisconsin_need-planning-3-day-weekend-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:118Discussion:864cf2a4-49b6-400c-8c39-8d8187a42158Post:8077ffff-1940-4fb5-ae4b-8e2e968894e7">I need help planning a 3-day weekend wedding!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi, Thank you in advance for any suggestions and or feedback. I am throwing a three day couples retreat / wedding commencing on a Friday night and concluding on Sunday after an informal ceremony. I am not doing any traditional wedding standards (i.e. no bridal party, no center pieces, no programs, no monograms, no favors, <strong>no seating at the ceremony</strong>. You get the point) Dilemma, I am doing this intentionally because we are very non-traditional. I don’t want it to be downplayed because it’s not your typical wedding. We want it to be more along the lines of a commitment ceremony than a wedding. But we are actually getting married. We just want to hang out with our friends and family and then have them watch us exchange vows.     We will be providing food, accommodations, and spirits to our guest for the entire weekend. We are registering for gifts because we are spending money on the wedding it’s just being spent on tangible things versus napkins. Lol (monogram napkins are pretty just not for me)   The actual ceremony will only be about 15 minutes outside on a cliff over looking Lake Michigan and then I'm planning for guest (30 of our very close family and friends) to return inside the home and enjoy cocktails, tapas buffet, and the wedding cakes (three total different cakes & designs)   There will be flowers, candles, and music once everyone returns inside. I don’t want it to seem like our lack of the typical wedding frills as a budget conscious decision. I am just not into all the “frills” of weddings. I appreciate them and find them enjoyable for other people. It’s just not my thing. How do I convey our wedding vibe to our guest without having to explain why all the frills are not there? I am setting up a website that sets the tone of the weekend which I describe as “A weekend of fellowship and love.” Does this make sense and would you understand it?   Thanks!
Posted by ykandi22z[/QUOTE]

Most everything sounds fine to me, but the bolded.  You will have chairs for everyone, right?  I hope this just means you won't have ushers walking people to their seats, and that is totally fine. 

Another point is, what if some of your guests cannot commit to a 3-day weekend?  Sometimes, DH and I have plans or have to work.  I would hate to miss out on a friend's wedding because I couldn't make all three days.  Would it be clear to your guests when the actual wedding is? 

Jelenny

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_wisconsin_need-planning-3-day-weekend-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:118Discussion:864cf2a4-49b6-400c-8c39-8d8187a42158Post:08ff7cf3-7def-4df5-9a3a-3427b877e513">Re: I need help planning a 3-day weekend wedding!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to I need help planning a 3-day weekend wedding!!! : Most everything sounds fine to me, but the bolded.  You will have chairs for everyone, right?  I hope this just means you won't have ushers walking people to their seats, and that is totally fine.  Another point is, what if some of your guests cannot commit to a 3-day weekend?  Sometimes, DH and I have plans or have to work.  I would hate to miss out on a friend's wedding because I couldn't make all three days.  Would it be clear to your guests when the actual wedding is? 
Posted by Wiscisbliss[/QUOTE]

That was my thought - destination wedding I can see being a whole weekend deal, but what OP mentioned I may not be able to attend - three days is a lot to ask for people and that does not include travel time if people do need to travel for a 15 ceremony.

ykandi22z

@eudell - no I haven't but I will check it out. thx.

ykandi22z

@Wiscisbliss- Congrats on being a soon to be mom! How fun!! Re my question, I was planning not to have chairs outside for the ceremony portion but nothing is concrete. I was visualizing me walking out to the bluff with my father, my guest standing around the bluff with champagne to toast with, and a quick exchange of vows then we go inside where there is seating for a tapas buffet.

I was also planning on sending two invitations out. One for the guest that we want to stay for the whole weekend if they can (which is 5 couples) and one for parents, children, and others that are only invited to the ceremony. On my RSVP I ask how many days they will be staying and will they bring children to the ceremony.

ykandi22z

@Jelenny - The actual ceremony will be about 15min but on my invitations it says from 12pm to 4pm which includes the "reception" time. Guest will have to drive about 30 min to get to the venue.

Wiscisbliss

I think it would be nice to have seats for everyone.  If someone shows up 15 minutes before the wedding and your ceremony takes 15 minutes that is a half an hour of standing in high heeled shoes (possibly on grass?).  Not a ton of fun. 

Thanks for the congrats!  We are very excited! 

KatoNorway

Even for my dear brothers, whom I love to death and are very close with- a 3 day weekend is a lot to ask for- but that's just my opinion. I would ask your family/friends whom you plan to invite for the weekend and see how they feel about it.