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Etiquette

IMO~how something like this should be handled

Drewsgirl31Drewsgirl31 member
100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper First Anniversary
edited June 2014 in Etiquette
In short, one of my best and longest friends who is standing up as an honor guest sent me a message earlier that she had bad news. She's broken her arm, needs a full cast and thought I wouldn't want her to still be apart of it. I don't care about a cast being in photos. I care about her healing and still being there if she wants to be.

Take note all of you that freak out because you feel like one of your bridesmaids is going to ruin that perfect photo in your head due to pregnancy/tattoos/broken bones. Are pictures/your day really worth a friendship??

ETA: forgot to include the pic
downtondivaluckysnorkel

Re: IMO~how something like this should be handled

  • It's really sad that the Wedding Industrial Complex has gotten so insane that your friend thought you would care more about the photos than her health! Wishing her a quick recovery.
    Drewsgirl31
  • Thank you and I know! I was kinda upset that she would even assume such a thing but she told me her sister had been asked to step down when she broke her leg and they never thought that bride would do that either. It is very sad that people are more worried about what their day will look like than their friends feelings
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    OMG. Not only will her cast totes ruin your photos, how is she supposed to hold her bouquet without the use of two hands? The horror!  

    :)  Poor dear. Wishing her a speedy recovery!  
    ________________________________


    ashley8918Drewsgirl31
  • VulgarGirlVulgarGirl Desert Oasis member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    My good friend was in her friend's wedding a few years ago, she was told she wasn't allowed to wear her glasses at the wedding because it would ruin the photos. Glasses. 

    Unlike me she's a pushover people pleaser and went along with it for the ceremony and photos afterwards. I still roll my eyes at it.

    So good on you @Drewsgirls31 for being a normal and sane person!
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  • monkeysipmonkeysip member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited June 2014
    MagicInk

    Obviously, a REAL friend would just get lasik surgery for their friend's wedding.  Sheesh!


    Don't forget the burlap and lace for a beautiful rustic wedding cast!

    SaveSave
    Megalega14blabla89melbelleup
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    In short, one of my best and longest friends who is standing up as an honor guest sent me a message earlier that she had bad news. She's broken her arm, needs a full cast and thought I wouldn't want her to still be apart of it. I don't care about a cast being in photos. I care about her healing and still being there if she wants to be. Take note all of you that freak out because you feel like one of your bridesmaids is going to ruin that perfect photo in your head due to pregnancy/tattoos/broken bones. Are pictures/your day really worth a friendship?? ETA: forgot to include the pic
    Is she a bridesmaid?  What exactly is an honor guest?
    sofakingmad
  • slothiegalslothiegal The Sloth Farm member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    Thank you and I know! I was kinda upset that she would even assume such a thing but she told me her sister had been asked to step down when she broke her leg and they never thought that bride would do that either. It is very sad that people are more worried about what their day will look like than their friends feelings
    I'd be more more worried about your poor friend and her clumsy genes!  ;)

    Just kidding (god knows I'm not one to talk, I'm forever coming into work with weird bumps and bruises), I hope she heals quickly and I'm so glad to read a story about a sane bride!
    Anniversary

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  • MobKaz said:



    In short, one of my best and longest friends who is standing up as an honor guest sent me a message earlier that she had bad news. She's broken her arm, needs a full cast and thought I wouldn't want her to still be apart of it. I don't care about a cast being in photos. I care about her healing and still being there if she wants to be.

    Take note all of you that freak out because you feel like one of your bridesmaids is going to ruin that perfect photo in your head due to pregnancy/tattoos/broken bones. Are pictures/your day really worth a friendship??

    ETA: forgot to include the pic

    Is she a bridesmaid?  What exactly is an honor guest?


    We are having a vow renewal so she's not a bridesmaid since I'm not a bride. I wasn't going to have any one up there with us besides us and our kids but our closest friends staged an intervention of sorts and told us they were hurt and offended that we didn't ask them to stand with us since they had been there and helped us through our separation a few years back. So I asked them to stand with us, they said yes and then I found the knot and realized it was a no no but that it's also a no no to tell someone you don't want them to stand with you anymore. So the best I could figure to describe them is an honor guest lol
    MobKaz
  • Honestly, a good photographer will pose her so you don't notice her cast.  My daughter attended a formal dinner, and the president of the organization that was hosting the dinner had broken her arm.  She sat close to my daughter and posed smiling together.  You couldn't see the cast at all.  If your friend continues to worry, tell her this.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    Drewsgirl31
  • JCbride2015JCbride2015 Dirty Jerz member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    This is OT but I really like the term honor guest. Well, all guests are honored-- but it emphasizes the wedding party is there to be honored, not to be your maid. 

    Well done on caring about your friend! My wedding party will have plenty of tattoos, different heights and colors, and different modesty requirements. Nobody will look like carbon copies. It's all good!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

    Drewsgirl31
  • LondonLisaLondonLisa London, UK member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    My sister was in a wedding where the bride was freaking out because one of the other bridesmaids was going to be 7 months pregnant and she was worried she was going take away attention from her during the ceremony. Cut to the ceremony, and it is my non-pregnant, completely able-bodied, non-tatttoo or brighly coloured hair sister who locked her knees and faints during the ceremony! Just goes to show that it doesn't matter what they are wearing, if they have tattoos, have gained 10 stone, or purple and pink striped hair, they are your closest friends and you should love them no matter what. Also, things happen, the only people that worry about having enough attention are 13 year olds!
    Drewsgirl31
  • Oh no! Your poor friend. That must hurt.

    One of my bridesmaids also broke her wrist about 2 weeks before our wedding. She had her arm in a cast that was covered with some kind of beige wrap? Bandage?  (I know nothing about medical equipment of any kind.)

    The morning of the wedding, her mom comes into where we are getting ready (and this friend's daughter was also a flower girl) and wrapped a white iridescent ribbon around the cast. Have to say, it looked pretty good! I wouldn't have cared if any of the cast was noticeable in any photo, but it wasn't. 
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  • I would seriously want to decorate the heck out of that cast:)  Maybe trailing ribbons and flowers?  

    Wishing your friend a speedy recovery.
  • RebeccaB88RebeccaB88 Figment of Your Imagination member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    One of my sister's bridesmaids had complications from an orthopedic surgery (she was supposed to be fully recovered a month or so before the wedding) and had to wear one of the big clunky boots on one foot to the wedding. She offered to drop out but my sister insisted she stay. (The dresses were short so you could see the boot.)  The photographer did a great job of hiding the boot in the pictures. It didn't matter to my sister, she just wanted her friend there.
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