Hi everyone,
I had 4 bridesmaids (including one MOH) at my wedding this past weekend. One girl "R" was a friend I'd known for a few years, but we have very different lifestyles and are at somewhat different points in our lives. I chose her to be a bridesmaid because I thought that we were good enough friends and that she'd always have my back.
I offered to pay for all of my bridesmaids' dresses and their hair/makeup because I knew that "R" and another one of my bridesmaids would find it financially more difficult to pay for these AND travel down to our wedding, which was out of the area. For my friend "R", I offered to let her share my room the night before the wedding, since my fiance would be in a different hotel, and that she could stay in the room on our wedding night since I would be staying with my husband in the other hotel.
The issues with "R" started the day before the wedding, when she demanded my friend's boyfriend drop her off at the front of the hotel (he was driving a bunch of people to and from the rehearsal dinner, and was just turning into the parking lot to park his car). She did not say please or thank you, and rudely said "stop here, let me off."
During the day of the wedding, "R" never stopped complaining about the way her hair was done, even though our guests and relatives thought all of the girls had beautiful updos. Not only did she whine to everyone, including other guests and bridesmaids, about her hair and how she didn't like it or the artist (who, by the way, was absolutely wonderful and very sweet, and did an amazing job on everyone), she did it to my face multiple times.
"R" interjected herself into everyone's conversations and pictures throughout the entire day and night, and behaved in such an attention-seeking way that many others in the bridal party were quite embarrassed. She "photobombed" what would've otherwise been nice, sweet photos of me with my friends that I haven't seen in years. It was utterly embarrassing, inappropriate behavior that no one knew how to handle.
Not only did "R" not offer to pay for some of the cost of the room, she ordered a $10 movie later that night on our account, and didn't even let us know that the hotel had sent strawberries and champagne to our room. We found out only when I stopped by the room (I told her I was going to stop by after the wedding so I could pick up my remaining bag) that she had already opened the champagne and started eating the strawberries with someone she'd found to bring back to the room.
I was absolutely livid that night; the only thing I said to her when she complained about her hair repeatedly throughout the day was that she looked great, and that I really liked her hair (which I did), because I did not want to have any sort of negative conversation during my wedding.
Knot readers, I spent over $500 on each bridesmaid, between the dress, hair/makeup, small gifts, and their lunch and manicures the day before. "R" was able to spend two nights in my hotel room for free. I am not expecting payment from her or anyone, but I don't really know how I should handle any impending conversation.
At this point, I would be fine if I never spoke to her again, as it is very difficult for me to place much value on our friendship after the wedding weekend. I felt extremely disrespected after all I'd tried to do to make the wedding weekend fun for my bridesmaids and myself, and whenever she "likes" one of my photos on social media, my blood starts to boil, and I am thinking of just blocking her completely so I don't have to think about this ever again.
If you could let me know any thoughts you might have about this, that would be much appreciated.