Children at Head Table?

613mdw

Hi all!

First timer here, hope this is on the right board! I've been lurking for a while and have used so much advice from here to get through my planning, but we have come across a dilemma and I thought I would come here for help.

We are working on the head table and plan to do the Royal Table setup... we would like to have the bridal party sit with their SOs. The issue is, The BM and MOH each have a couple children (not with each other).  There are a couple other BP members with babies. Is it okay to have children at the head table? I know some of the children would be fine sitting with grandparents, but the other children either don't know other adults besides members of the BP, or they wouldn't sit with other people for various reasons (too young is the main reason). I've never seen children at a head table at a wedding before, but I was curious if anyone else had seen this at a wedding s/he had attended.  

Thanks!

Simply Fated

I would definitely put young children with their parents. They are their parents' responsibility and I'm not sure it will go over well if you suggest telling the parents that they have to sit at separate tables. Young "cousins" table and things like that are one thing, but if they are really young and would prefer sitting with their parents, that's something that I would definitely accommodate.

I'm not sure if I remember offhand seeing kids at a head/royal table, but that doesn't mean it can't be done. And, honestly, I think it's something I personally would like to see more of. I just don't like seeing people pawning kids off on unsuspecting grandparents or other adults just so they can have free hands, kwim?

LondonLisa

I definitely wouldn't think it was strange to have children at the head table, but you need to think about what is in the best interest of the child. Sometimes being up on what is essentially a stage can be hard for little ones. What happens if there is a complete meltdown or a little one doesn't want to eat their food and is fussy? I know there is a risk of this happening no matter what, but at the Kings table they are essentially in the spotlight, which can exacerbate toddler frustration. I definitely agree that they should stay with their parents, but I would also suggest asking your MOH and BMs how they would think their child would react to that. They will know their child best and maybe it is foregoing the King's table in favour of having your WP sit with their families in regular guest tables. 

Lauderdale Pink

I am a huge fan of a "Plan B" for younger children.  If they are well raised and can sit with the adults, I think it is a wonderful experience for them. However, even the best raised, most well mannered children can experience sensory overload.  We set up a baby sitting room with a trusted babysitter and plenty of games and snacks.  Parents also provided a change of clothes, which I never thought of.  By the end of the evening, the littles were much happier and their parents had some nice "adult time".

mysticl

613mdw said:

Hi all!

First timer here, hope this is on the right board! I've been lurking for a while and have used so much advice from here to get through my planning, but we have come across a dilemma and I thought I would come here for help.

We are working on the head table and plan to do the Royal Table setup... we would like to have the bridal party sit with their SOs. The issue is, The BM and MOH each have a couple children (not with each other).  There are a couple other BP members with babies. Is it okay to have children at the head table? I know some of the children would be fine sitting with grandparents, but the other children either don't know other adults besides members of the BP, or they wouldn't sit with other people for various reasons (too young is the main reason). I've never seen children at a head table at a wedding before, but I was curious if anyone else had seen this at a wedding s/he had attended.  

Thanks!

Yes, it is okay for them to be at the head table.  I went to a wedding where they did a slightly different set up.  The bride and groom had a sweetheart table and then the rest of the wedding party was split between two tables and sat with their SOs and children. 

613mdw

Thanks, all good things to think about. I definitely would never pawn someone else's children off on their grandchildren - it was my mother who asked if I wanted to seat the children of the MoH with her (she is their grandmother).  But, I don't want to say it's not okay for her children to sit up there, but okay for the other kids, nor do I want to cause any hurt feelings by suggesting to anyone that I wouldn't want their kids up there with them.  

I love the idea of the sweetheart table and sitting the rest of the wedding party with their families- seems like a great solution!!

kmmssg

My DD had a sweetheart table last weekend for 4 - the bride, groom, and the bride's 2 children.  Yes, I am their grandmother, and yes, they are so incredibly adorable it could make your eyes hurt, but I am not biased at all - it looked really nice.  Nope, no bias here.

theartistformerlyknownas

Definitely seat them with their parents, wherever that may be. 

FWIW, my "head" table will just be me and then-H, his BM/BM's wife, my MOH/MOH's boyfriend. Then I'll have two tables of the remaining wedding party members with their SOs and children (my BM has 2 and his GM has 2).