encouraging people to ship our gifts

lacschmidt

We're getting married in 18 days, only a couple of gifts have shown up. Our wedding is 3000 miles from where we currently live, there is no way we're flying with our gifts, or shipping them ourselves. We've tried to hint to people that they should purchase off our registries and have the items shipped from the stores. I'm just afraid we'll end up with a bunch at the wedding that we'll have to return and repurchase once we're home. We included enclosure cards with RSVP info and registry info in with the invites, and now we're finding out that some people "didn't receive" the enclosure cards. I'm worried they have no idea we're registered anywhere and we'll end up with stuff we didn't register for. I guess I don't know what the best thing to do for this situation is. 

photokitty

You should never include any registry information with your invites. Honestly - People might be telling you they didn't receive them bc it was rude to send them and then ask about gifts. If people give you gifts at the wedding you do just what you said - return them and re-buy them at home. It is a gift, please stop acting like it is an inconvenience or something you are obligated to receive. It may take a little extra time, but it's not the end of the world. To tell people to ship the gifts would be rude, if they want to ship them they will. People are smart enough to find your registry assuming it a national store - i.e. macy's, BB&B, target, kohl's, william and sonoma, crate and barrel, JC Penny's, etc. If they want to give you a gift they will find it or they will give you money or select something for you. There's nothing to do, just relax and enjoy your wedding. GL!

chibiyui

Everything @photokitty said. 

Most likely, you'll get cash since you live so far away from where the wedding is. Those who do prefer to give physical gifts may bring them to the wedding, but you just return them and re-buy once you get home. There's also the chance that since you live so far away, you'll get gifts after the wedding. 

Relax and breath. 

theartistformerlyknownas

I would assume people are planning on giving cash or gift cards to the stores you're registered at. That's what I would do in that situation (and what I did do last weekend). Whatever happens though, you should accept whatever you are given graciously and not mention a word about gifts again until you're writing thank you notes. This is not something you need to worry yourself with so cross it off the list.

lyndausvi

lacschmidt said:

We're getting married in 18 days, only a couple of gifts have shown up. Our wedding is 3000 miles from where we currently live, there is no way we're flying with our gifts, or shipping them ourselves. We've tried to hint to people that they should purchase off our registries and have the items shipped from the stores. I'm just afraid we'll end up with a bunch at the wedding that we'll have to return and repurchase once we're home. We included enclosure cards with RSVP info and registry info in with the invites, and now we're finding out that some people "didn't receive" the enclosure cards. I'm worried they have no idea we're registered anywhere and we'll end up with stuff we didn't register for. I guess I don't know what the best thing to do for this situation is. 

Why not?  I lived on a small island and had my wedding in the states and I still shipped my gifts back home.  It's not really that big of a deal.     Sure a few I returned and had them resent to our home, but for the most part with good packing we shipped everything home.

MyNameIsNot

You put registry information in your invitation?  WTF?

If you can't be bothered to transport your gifts, then donate them.  Gifts are a nice thing that people do for you, not a burden that they lighten by shipping.  

huskypuppy14

Why did you register?

LondonLisa

If you are having a shower it is your responsibility to transport the gifts. 

leelabear

Including the info in the invites is generally considered tacky as you can see by how others responded here. At the bottom on my invite, I put our wedding website there. The registry info is only on our website. On there I kindly gave my home address in case some people preferred to ship larger items directly to us. I didn't require them too.

Since ours is an out of town wedding, we didn't put too many large items on our registry. If you put large items on there and you don't want to receive them at your wedding, you are sort of asking for trouble. 

Registries help people out who don't know what to get you or would like to get you what you really need as a couple. You shouldn't "worry" that people will get you something else. Its a gift after all. 

misshart00

Since there is "no way [you're] flying with gifts or shipping them" yourselves, what do you plan to do when someone horribly gives you a boxed gift at your wedding?

mysticl

I had a friend who got married in a different state than where she was living. I knew she was arriving at the wedding location about a week before the wedding and that they were leaving from that location for their honeymoon. So I waited until a couple of weeks after the wedding to have their gift shipped to them.

AddieCake

misshart00 said:

Since there is "no way [you're] flying with gifts or shipping them" yourselves, what do you plan to do when someone horribly gives you a boxed gift at your wedding?

This. I am really put off by you saying there is no way you are doing this. That came across unbelievably rude to me. Are you planning to just throw the gift away if it happens? 

RebeccaB88

If someone is kind enough to give you a gift, you should be willing to deal with having it shipped to your home yourself.

LadyMillil

DH and I live across the country from my hometown, which is where we had our wedding. The majority of our guests didn't even look for a registry and just gave us cash or cheques at the wedding because they knew we were flying home. We had 4 people ship registry gifts to our home before the wedding and 2 people brought physical gifts to the wedding, which we were able to fit into our luggage.

sophhabobopha

I don't understand why you registered in the first place.

speakeasy14

Most people have enough common sense to not bring a gift to a destination wedding; to assume your guests do not have common sense is quite rude.  Every destination wedding I have been in or gone to, majority of the guests brought a cash gift or had the gift shipped after the event (shower and/or wedding).  

Second, the fact that you're stressing over the fact that you have not received gifts, and will not even consider shipping anything you receive, is off-putting.  

But honestly, this is not something you should be stressing over so close to your wedding.