Wedding Fundraiser at Work

AuroraRose41

I had this email in my inbox this morning, and wanted to share with you lovely ladies. The coworker who sent it is the sister in law of the bride, who just copied it from another email that the bride sent (I have no idea where the bride actually works, and haven't met either of them). This email went out to our classifieds mail list, which has thousands of people from our offices all over the world on it. I am definitely side eyeing this hard, because I think it is just as bad as a GoFundMe.

 

Hi All! 

I am trying to help my sister in law with wedding expenses. Please see her email below.

 

Hi All!

As most of you know, I’m getting married! JJJ I am so stinking excited!! But, as most of you also know…weddings are EXPENSIVE. Since my fiancé and I are doing everything on our own, we are finding it extremely stressful just trying to figure out how the heck we are going to afford everything. I don’t want anything fancy…just a place where everyone can get together and celebrate our special day with us. We finally found a venue that we love, is inexpensive, and very flexible and conveniently located…but can’t book it until we come up with the deposit. L So, I thought I would do a small little CAKE fundraiser to help us raise a little bit of money so we can book this place and start planning! No pressure… regardless, I get to spend the rest of my life with the man that I love so I am a happy camper either way. J

 

Here’s what I’m offering, and let me know if you would like to place an order by COB this Thursday, June 19^th! J

 

Mason Jar Cakes (now offering smaller sizes):

24 oz - $20

16 oz - $15

12 oz - $10

8 oz - $8 (must order 2)

 

Flavors:

Rainbow w/buttercream

Bacon Chocolate (add $5)

Chocolate Peanut Butter

Cheesecake (add $5)

Red Velvet w/ Cream Cheese Icing – Most Popular!

Carrot Cake w/ Cream Cheese Icing

German Chocolate w/ Coconut Pecan Icing

Chocolate Fudge

Chocolate Caramel

Vanilla w/ Vanilla buttercream

Blue Velvet w/ Vanilla buttercream

Strawberry Shortcake with whipped creamy icing (add $5)

 

Also, I am offering Cupcake Bouquets (pictures attached):

Small Bouquet w/ mini or regular cupcakes (approx. 12 mini or 6 regular): $30

Medium Bouquet w/ mini or regular cupcakes (approx. 18 mini or 12 regular): $45

Large Bouquet w/ mini or regular cupcakes: (approx. 24 mini or 18 regular) $60

 

Flower types available:

Hydrangea – any color (most popular)

Roses – any color

Sunflowers

 

Delivery will be Next Tuesday, the 24^th. Cash on Delivery, I’ll send a reminder out Monday

 

Also…please keep me in mind for all of your future cake or cupcake needs! This is something that I LOVE doing, makes me happy, keeps me busy, and out of my honey’s hair for a few hours lol J

 

ETF: weird formatting issue when I copied it over

photokitty

Yuck! If she had just sent an email selling cakes NBD.

larrygaga

At LEAST she's offering goods in exchange for lolmasonjar cakes. At least.

mrsmorales2be

Agreed. Nothing wrong with hustling for cake sales, per se - maybe inappropriate for SIL to send it to everyone, but people can always delete if not interested - but to specifically say "hey, buy my cakes so I can plan my wedding" is tacky.

SBmini

larrygaga said:

At LEAST she's offering goods in exchange for lolmasonjar cakes. At least.

This! She's not begging for donations, she's selling cakes. I approve of cake sales for any reason!

AuroraRose41

I have no problem with selling cakes. I have a problem with it being marketed as "Pay for my wedding!". Also, it might just be me, but I am pretty sure if you have to fund raise to come up with the deposit for your venue, then it isn't "affordable" for you. (However, I'm only a bridesmaid here, and BF and I have been ring shopping, but no BSC planning, so I could be way off with how much a deposit to hold a venue is. I just assumed it would be a small fraction of the overall cost, and not like 50%).

SeaCaptainOtter

melbelleup

mrsmorales2be said:

Agreed. Nothing wrong with hustling for cake sales, per se - maybe inappropriate for SIL to send it to everyone, but people can always delete if not interested - but to specifically say "hey, buy my cakes so I can plan my wedding" is tacky.

This is how I feel too, but at the same time, at least your getting a product for it.

mrsmorales2be

It turns it from an enterprise to a guilt-tripping money grab. She should just sell her cakes. If she gets customers, great! Good for her. But to guilt trip people by bringing her wedding/financial situation into it makes it wrong.

lkristenj

AuroraRose41 said:

I have no problem with selling cakes. I have a problem with it being marketed as "Pay for my wedding!". Also, it might just be me, but I am pretty sure if you have to fund raise to come up with the deposit for your venue, then it isn't "affordable" for you. (However, I'm only a bridesmaid here, and BF and I have been ring shopping, but no BSC planning, so I could be way off with how much a deposit to hold a venue is. I just assumed it would be a small fraction of the overall cost, and not like 50%).

It may be different for others, but most of my deposits have been 50%. The only one that was not was my photographer. I had to pay 50% of my venue (both church and reception), 75% of my dress, 50% of my catering, $700 for my photographer (out of ~$2500), etc.

However, I too thought that if you can't afford the deposit to hold your place, you should probably look into another location for your wedding because it's not what you can afford.

AuroraRose41

@lkristenj thanks for clarifying with the deposit thing! I'm glad that you agree that it isn't affordable if you have to ask strangers for money to cover it. 

JCbride2015

AuroraRose41 said:

@lkristenj thanks for clarifying with the deposit thing! I'm glad that you agree that it isn't affordable if you have to ask strangers for money to cover it. 

Our venue deposit was about 10% of the contract price, just to hold the date.  We have 50% due 6 months before the wedding and the rest due the week of.  Most other deposits were a higher percent: 1/3 for the music, 50% for the photog.  But either way, if you need to fundraise, it isn't a responsible decision.

I am not opposed to selling cake and I actually think this is a pretty creative way to make some extra money for the wedding budget.  But not great to have SIL send it to her entire company, and TERRIBLE to say you're doing it for your wedding.  It's like she's just hoping people will donate once they hear about her superspeshulday.

Inkdancer

AuroraRose41

@JCBride2015, I was thinking that it would probably be closer to 10% to hold the date (which is stated in the email that they can't book it yet until they have money). 

And I myself am a pretty good baker (I can even do two tone hydrangea flower frosting....can I charge $10 a cupcake for that since 1 color is $5? /sarcasm), and have thought about starting a business on the side. But I would never advertise it as a fundraiser for a wedding, honeymoon, house, car, etc. even if that's what I was using the money for. I would just advertise it as a cake business, because that is what it is (and would NEVER use mason jars)! 

ETA: AWing for proof (sorry for potato quality, and BF wanted brownies that night, but this was my first try at two tone hydrangea frosting flowers)

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

My gut reaction was "You can't afford the deposit?  Ruh-roh."

And extra five dollas for bacon?  Outrageous.

Jokes aside, yeah I agree.  No problem with people selling cakes, whatever, but the light-hearted tone of "oh em gee, so much expensive.  Help a girl out!" is just UGH.

Jells2dot0

My poor SD got sucked into Pinterest and tried to make mason jar cakes for us for Xmas. It was a nightmare. Not everything should be re-created from that site.

beethery

AuroraRose41 said:

I had this email in my inbox this morning, and wanted to share with you lovely ladies. The coworker who sent it is the sister in law of the bride, who just copied it from another email that the bride sent (I have no idea where the bride actually works, and haven't met either of them). This email went out to our classifieds mail list, which has thousands of people from our offices all over the world on it. I am definitely side eyeing this hard, because I think it is just as bad as a GoFundMe.

This should probably be grounds for AT LEAST a talking-to from the supervisor. Like, get a fuckin' clue.

SapphireCounselor

beethery said:

AuroraRose41 said:

I had this email in my inbox this morning, and wanted to share with you lovely ladies. The coworker who sent it is the sister in law of the bride, who just copied it from another email that the bride sent (I have no idea where the bride actually works, and haven't met either of them). This email went out to our classifieds mail list, which has thousands of people from our offices all over the world on it. I am definitely side eyeing this hard, because I think it is just as bad as a GoFundMe.

This should probably be grounds for AT LEAST a talking-to from the supervisor. Like, get a fuckin' clue.




This was my thought. It just isn't appropriate.

climbingsingle

I didn't think there was ever a way to make cake sound unappetizing. But yeah, mason jar cake did it.

Also, they can't afford the deposit? How are they going to pay for the rest of the wedding?

AuroraRose41

@ClimbingBrideNY I have a feeling that this is only the first of many cake fundraiser emails since they can't afford the deposit.

mysticl

I'm cool with the bride turning a hobby into a way to earn money. Nothing rude about that. Though she could end up with the health department at her door if they haven't already approved her kitchen.  

However, the co-worker who e-mailed this to the entire company should face disciplinary action. I know some of my previous employers had policies against soliciting at work.  

Sugargirl1019

How can she afford the supplies to MAKE these cakes if she can't afford the deposit? You're spending more money on cake ingredients before it returns (hopefully) back to you!

ElcaB

That's pretty bad. No biggie if you just tell everyone you're selling cakes, but mentioning that it's for the wedding is bad form --- not to mention the obvious deduction of points for the surplus of emoticons. 

hikebikebemerry

mysticl said:

I'm cool with the bride turning a hobby into a way to earn money. Nothing rude about that. Though she could end up with the health department at her door if they haven't already approved her kitchen.  

However, the co-worker who e-mailed this to the entire company should face disciplinary action. I know some of my previous employers had policies against soliciting at work.  

This was my first thought.

Our baker started out at home, and she said that she got visited by DOH at least 5x/year vs. the 1-2x/ year visits she gets now that she is running a bakery outside of her home.

Excluding the health code stuff, this wouldn't bother me if it was more, "I love cake!  I love baking! Based on these two interests- I'm going to start a cake business!" vs. "I need monies, so plzzzzz buy my cake!!!"

Bubblegum5586

AuroraRose41 said:

I have no problem with selling cakes. I have a problem with it being marketed as "Pay for my wedding!". Also, it might just be me, but I am pretty sure if you have to fund raise to come up with the deposit for your venue, then it isn't "affordable" for you. (However, I'm only a bridesmaid here, and BF and I have been ring shopping, but no BSC planning, so I could be way off with how much a deposit to hold a venue is. I just assumed it would be a small fraction of the overall cost, and not like 50%).

This is exactly what I was thinking! The deposit is just a VERY small part of what your wedding will cost!

LondonLisa

Am I being too non-pinteresty in asking what is a Mason Jar cake? Is it just a cake in a jam jar? If so, for US$24 I could shove cake in a jar, too. Although it doesn't seem like the best receptacle for serving or eating cake. I think I am more confused logistically as it seems like the icing to cake ratio would be really off and you would just have a sticky hand trying to get to the bottom. Full disclosure, I do tend to look at pinterest like this: 

At least she is selling something, however, I'm really, really surprised your work would allow this. HR really should say something to this worker about soliciting goods as it puts everyone in a really tight spot. 

Part of me wishes someone would say to her to go have a small wedding and give out her jam jar cakes to the guests to avoid this whole kerfuffle. 

mysticl

LondonLisa said:

Am I being too non-pinteresty in asking what is a Mason Jar cake? Is it just a cake in a jam jar? If so, for US$24 I could shove cake in a jar, too. Although it doesn't seem like the best receptacle for serving or eating cake. I think I am more confused logistically as it seems like the icing to cake ratio would be really off and you would just have a sticky hand trying to get to the bottom. Full disclosure, I do tend to look at pinterest like this: 

At least she is selling something, however, I'm really, really surprised your work would allow this. HR really should say something to this worker about soliciting goods as it puts everyone in a really tight spot. 

Part of me wishes someone would say to her to go have a small wedding and give out her jam jar cakes to the guests to avoid this whole kerfuffle. 

It's a cake baked in a mason jar.  Stuff in mason jars is trending heavily on pinterest.  However, the more practical application is people will send them in care packages to the troops overseas.  It keeps the cake from going bad.  Though you do have to worry about the jar breaking in transit.  When DH was on his last deployment the ship posted pictures to Facebook of them sorting the mail and they literally throw it around the room.  

mysticl

hikebikebemerry said:

mysticl said:

I'm cool with the bride turning a hobby into a way to earn money. Nothing rude about that. Though she could end up with the health department at her door if they haven't already approved her kitchen.  

However, the co-worker who e-mailed this to the entire company should face disciplinary action. I know some of my previous employers had policies against soliciting at work.  

This was my first thought.

Our baker started out at home, and she said that she got visited by DOH at least 5x/year vs. the 1-2x/ year visits she gets now that she is running a bakery outside of her home.

Excluding the health code stuff, this wouldn't bother me if it was more, "I love cake!  I love baking! Based on these two interests- I'm going to start a cake business!" vs. "I need monies, so plzzzzz buy my cake!!!"

There was someone in my town who started a dinner service.  She would post her menu for the week and you let her know which meals you wanted to order.  She would make the appropriate number each day and then deliver them to her customers.  And then the health department found out and shut her down. I think she was able to reopen once she jumped through all of their hoops.  I never used the service but a friend was always sharing her links.   

AuroraRose41

mysticl said:

hikebikebemerry said:

mysticl said:

I'm cool with the bride turning a hobby into a way to earn money. Nothing rude about that. Though she could end up with the health department at her door if they haven't already approved her kitchen.  

However, the co-worker who e-mailed this to the entire company should face disciplinary action. I know some of my previous employers had policies against soliciting at work.  

This was my first thought.

Our baker started out at home, and she said that she got visited by DOH at least 5x/year vs. the 1-2x/ year visits she gets now that she is running a bakery outside of her home.

Excluding the health code stuff, this wouldn't bother me if it was more, "I love cake!  I love baking! Based on these two interests- I'm going to start a cake business!" vs. "I need monies, so plzzzzz buy my cake!!!"

There was someone in my town who started a dinner service.  She would post her menu for the week and you let her know which meals you wanted to order.  She would make the appropriate number each day and then deliver them to her customers.  And then the health department found out and shut her down. I think she was able to reopen once she jumped through all of their hoops.  I never used the service but a friend was always sharing her links.   

So, should I be really snarky and find a way to submit this to the Health Department?

I really feel like doing that, because technically I don't think sending this email to that list is against company policy (but I can double check on that too!). I have seen many others send emails promoting their business or promoting fundraisers for schools and charities, so I don't think that this is any different. But at least those are for a good cause, or just a new business, and not "OMG I'm so special and everything needs to be perfect for my special day but I can't pay for it help me out !!!!!!!".

grumbledore

Yeah she should have just left out the stuff about the wedding and just sold the cake.  It's fine to sell things to make money to pay for your wedding, but for the love of god please don't call it a fundraiser like you are a charity.

mysticl

AuroraRose41 said:

mysticl said:

hikebikebemerry said:

mysticl said:

I'm cool with the bride turning a hobby into a way to earn money. Nothing rude about that. Though she could end up with the health department at her door if they haven't already approved her kitchen.  

However, the co-worker who e-mailed this to the entire company should face disciplinary action. I know some of my previous employers had policies against soliciting at work.  

This was my first thought.

Our baker started out at home, and she said that she got visited by DOH at least 5x/year vs. the 1-2x/ year visits she gets now that she is running a bakery outside of her home.

Excluding the health code stuff, this wouldn't bother me if it was more, "I love cake!  I love baking! Based on these two interests- I'm going to start a cake business!" vs. "I need monies, so plzzzzz buy my cake!!!"

There was someone in my town who started a dinner service.  She would post her menu for the week and you let her know which meals you wanted to order.  She would make the appropriate number each day and then deliver them to her customers.  And then the health department found out and shut her down. I think she was able to reopen once she jumped through all of their hoops.  I never used the service but a friend was always sharing her links.   

So, should I be really snarky and find a way to submit this to the Health Department?

I really feel like doing that, because technically I don't think sending this email to that list is against company policy (but I can double check on that too!). I have seen many others send emails promoting their business or promoting fundraisers for schools and charities, so I don't think that this is any different. But at least those are for a good cause, or just a new business, and not "OMG I'm so special and everything needs to be perfect for my special day but I can't pay for it help me out !!!!!!!".

It wouldn't be that hard.  I assume the e-mail includes all of her contact information.  Just contact the health department for wherever she lives and let them know someone is running a commercial bakery out of their kitchen and you are concerned it may not be up to standards.  Honestly, if she's not following proper safety and sanitation practices she could kill someone.  Imagine if she used the same spoon to stir the chocolate peanut butter and the chocolate fudge without washing it in between because "It's all chocolate" only the person ordering the chocolate fudge is allergic to peanuts.