who does that??

Lowell14

Just off the phone with my friend to congratulate her on the birth of her son. I asked how her boyfriend was during the birth (c-section). Apparently, the bf left left my friend 3 weeks ago!! He has been going out more during the pregnancy but my friend thought he was 'getting it out of his system'.

3 weeks before she gave birth, he tidied the house, gave her a kiss goodnight, then text her at 2am saying he wasn't coming back!

Thankful she has a loving family and many friends...but who does that?

Maybe the guy leaving his bride at the alter and this guy should met...and go far far away...

chibiyui

Wow. Um. I got nothing.

sarawifenow

Holy crap. I feel so sorry for your friend! She should look at this as a blessing in disguise, though. Poor thing.

JCbride2015

lyndausvi

wow.   That is just crazy.

Lowell14

Now the baby's here, she's doing better. All energy into him. I just don't get the mentality of people who can't break up or leave like adults

wandajune6

Lately there have been a lot of stories about garbage friends, partners, etc. It's starting to depress me.

I keep channeling my dad but I can't help but think that your friend and her child are so lucky to know that he's a flake. They'll be much better off without him.

monkeysip

If he doesn't want to be romantically involved with her anymore... fine.  But it sounds like he's not even around to care for his own baby or to help the woman who just had his baby!  Especially after a C-section, moms need help! 

I can't stand people who are "adult" enough to have sex but not adult enough to care for any children that come as a result.

loveislouder

That's bloody bullshit. I'm sorry if this is offensive, but if you lay down to make a baby you can stand up and be a father.

JMalettas

Some guys will never be men..Always chasing after the next best thing, & not taking responsibility for their actions. This is not the kind of man I would want my son growing up, and being influenced by. I can only imagine how hard this is for her, but hopefully she realizes that ultimately, it's going to be the best environment for her son. I just have no tolerance for people like that. (Men or women, that walk away from their families). You want to leave without notice? There's the door, and don't ever look back. 

 *J

AddieCake

I wish there were not so many assholes in the world. 

mysticl

I knew a guy who went to the store one night and never went home. It was winter and his wife panicked thinking something horrible had happened. Nah, he was just done.

jdluvr06

It seems like there are more and more assholes everyday. Humanity makes me sad. I'm sending tons of positive thoughts to your friend and her baby!!!

jenna8984

I hate to sound negative but does anyone else wonder if these girls saw red flags? I feel like I know the true character and core of who my fiance is and that he would never do something like that. Not to say that it could NEVER happen to me because anything is possible but it would be 100% not something FI would do. Not saying that your friend is a dumbass or anything, I just really wonder if he exhibited signs that she chose not to see.

I'm not trying to sounds high & mighty because I got suckered in too. My ex was physically and mentally abusive and I chose to stay in it for 4 years so I know what it's like to see the flags and ignore them or think it would change. But I knew every day "he is a douche, this is not going to end well". (which is why we didn't get married or have kids lol)  Either way, I hope she files for child support and good luck to her!

pinkcow13

I'm so sorry for your friend. Thankfully she seems to have a good network of family and friends.

 There must be some Sociopath club that this dude and Altar dude should join.

sophhabobopha

Is everybody taking crazy pills? WTF.

So sorry for your friend.

Lowell14

I hate to sound negative but does anyone else wonder if these girls saw red flags? I feel like I know the true character and core of who my fiance is and that he would never do something like that. Not to say that it could NEVER happen to me because anything is possible but it would be 100% not something FI would do. Not saying that your friend is a dumbass or anything, I just really wonder if he exhibited signs that she chose not to see.

I'm not trying to sounds high & mighty because I got suckered in too. My ex was physically and mentally abusive and I chose to stay in it for 4 years so I know what it's like to see the flags and ignore them or think it would change. But I knew every day "he is a douche, this is not going to end well". (which is why we didn't get married or have kids lol)  Either way, I hope she files for child support and good luck to her!

I think she saw flags but thought it was because she was pregnant, she put it down to moods and hormones. She's not overly sad so there were probably issues in the relationship she didn't speak about. The great part out of all this is that with or without the father, this baby was deeply wanted and loved from the beginning from my friend.

lyndausvi

jenna8984 said:

I hate to sound negative but does anyone else wonder if these girls saw red flags? I feel like I know the true character and core of who my fiance is and that he would never do something like that. Not to say that it could NEVER happen to me because anything is possible but it would be 100% not something FI would do. Not saying that your friend is a dumbass or anything, I just really wonder if he exhibited signs that she chose not to see.

I'm not trying to sounds high & mighty because I got suckered in too. My ex was physically and mentally abusive and I chose to stay in it for 4 years so I know what it's like to see the flags and ignore them or think it would change. But I knew every day "he is a douche, this is not going to end well". (which is why we didn't get married or have kids lol)  Either way, I hope she files for child support and good luck to her!

Often that is the case.  Love is often blind.

 Plus it take 2 to have unprotected sex.  One has the choice to be a parent or not.  The other is at the mercy of the one with the choice.     

Not everyone is meant to be a parent, the close to the due date the thought might have freaked him out.  I get it, it is scary.   Hopefully in time he will change his mind about everything in regards to being a parent.   

In the mean time she should file for CS.  Glad she has a good support system.

That said, some people are just plain assholes.

*** disclaimer  - as I woman I'm glad I have all the choices and do not want that to change.  I just try to think how it must feel for a guy not to have a choice.   A woman can give a child up for adoption with little judgement.  She and even change her mind and get the child back with little judgement that she gave up the child in the first place.    Men are labels assholes if they do not want a child.  If later they changed their minds and want to be a father their behavior is always held against them.   

All I know is I'm glad I have the choice.

mysticl

lyndausvi said:

jenna8984 said:

I hate to sound negative but does anyone else wonder if these girls saw red flags? I feel like I know the true character and core of who my fiance is and that he would never do something like that. Not to say that it could NEVER happen to me because anything is possible but it would be 100% not something FI would do. Not saying that your friend is a dumbass or anything, I just really wonder if he exhibited signs that she chose not to see.

I'm not trying to sounds high & mighty because I got suckered in too. My ex was physically and mentally abusive and I chose to stay in it for 4 years so I know what it's like to see the flags and ignore them or think it would change. But I knew every day "he is a douche, this is not going to end well". (which is why we didn't get married or have kids lol)  Either way, I hope she files for child support and good luck to her!

Often that is the case.  Love is often blind.

 Plus it take 2 to have unprotected sex.  One has the choice to be a parent or not.  The other is at the mercy of the one with the choice.     

Not everyone is meant to be a parent, the close to the due date the thought might have freaked him out.  I get it, it is scary.   Hopefully in time he will change his mind about everything in regards to being a parent.   

In the mean time she should file for CS.  Glad she has a good support system.

That said, some people are just plain assholes.

*** disclaimer  - as I woman I'm glad I have all the choices and do not want that to change.  I just try to think how it must feel for a guy not to have a choice.   A woman can give a child up for adoption with little judgement.  She and even change her mind and get the child back with little judgement that she gave up the child in the first place.    Men are labels assholes if they do not want a child.  If later they changed their minds and want to be a father their behavior is always held against them.   

All I know is I'm glad I have the choice.

First she has to get him on the birth certificate.

Rebl90

Wow.  

buttercup1958

MamaAlly89

jenna8984 said:

I hate to sound negative but does anyone else wonder if these girls saw red flags? I feel like I know the true character and core of who my fiance is and that he would never do something like that. Not to say that it could NEVER happen to me because anything is possible but it would be 100% not something FI would do. Not saying that your friend is a dumbass or anything, I just really wonder if he exhibited signs that she chose not to see.

I'm not trying to sounds high & mighty because I got suckered in too. My ex was physically and mentally abusive and I chose to stay in it for 4 years so I know what it's like to see the flags and ignore them or think it would change. But I knew every day "he is a douche, this is not going to end well". (which is why we didn't get married or have kids lol)  Either way, I hope she files for child support and good luck to her!

I think a lot of people try to look past the red flags once there is a baby involved. Many people think it's better for the child to grow up with their parents together because it's more "stable". Sad to say in a lot of these cases the child is probably better off growing up with a single parent, and not having the asshole one around.

theartistformerlyknownas

Any dick can be a father. It takes a man to be a dad.

Kauris

I'm glad to hear she has good friends and family, what I really hope she has is a good lawyer.

ElcaB

Poor thing. I hope if he hasn't already, he gets to know my BFF karma really, really well. 

EverAfer

WTF is wrong with people?

Good luck to her.  

Inkdancer

Sounds like my bio-source. I hope she gets child support, and finds someone who will love her and be good to her.

Senecaf

Sad. I'm glad she has a good support network.

iloveotters2014

That is just so sad. I understand the fear of having children...I myself have 0 desire to have them, but once the ship has sailed you kind of need to step up. Even if you don't want to be in a relationship with the mother of the child, it's still YOUR CHILD.

I'm glad she has a good support system, hopefully he will either come around or she can get child support.

lkristenj

schramm2407 said:

jenna8984 said:

I hate to sound negative but does anyone else wonder if these girls saw red flags? I feel like I know the true character and core of who my fiance is and that he would never do something like that. Not to say that it could NEVER happen to me because anything is possible but it would be 100% not something FI would do. Not saying that your friend is a dumbass or anything, I just really wonder if he exhibited signs that she chose not to see.

I'm not trying to sounds high & mighty because I got suckered in too. My ex was physically and mentally abusive and I chose to stay in it for 4 years so I know what it's like to see the flags and ignore them or think it would change. But I knew every day "he is a douche, this is not going to end well". (which is why we didn't get married or have kids lol)  Either way, I hope she files for child support and good luck to her!

I think a lot of people try to look past the red flags once there is a baby involved. Many people think it's better for the child to grow up with their parents together because it's more "stable". Sad to say in a lot of these cases the child is probably better off growing up with a single parent, and not having the asshole one around.

My FI has told me more than once how thankful he is that his parents did not stay together. They were married for 5 years before he was born and they divorced when he was 2-years-old. They had grown to hate each other and even now they find it difficult to be in the same room. (The wedding should be interesting). He was raised by his mother and saw his father (and later his half-siblings) only on Sundays. I think she did a wonderful job with him and he thinks very highly of his cousin's father because he taught him the things that his mother couldn't, like how to shave.

His school friend across the street was not so lucky. His parents stayed together until he graduated high school even though it was clear to anyone who saw them that they hated each other. They thought they were doing the best for their two sons, but my FI saw how living in a house with so much hate and mean spirit really messed up his friend emotionally and socially. By the time they were in middle school, they weren't friends anymore. FI doesn't think that he went to college.

FI's parents couldn't have raised him well together. FI doesn't want divorce for himself and is determined to bunk the trend in his family (all but once set of grandparents is divorced, even the step-grandparents). Still, we've talked a lot about it and know that if we grow to have such animosity toward each other like his parents that it is better for everyone to cut our losses, even if we have children at the time.

Of course, we like to think that we are better matched and communicate better than his parents too. He wouldn't marry me unless we lived together for at least a year (we're going on 2 years cohabitating now!) because he repeatedly heard his mom say that it was about that time that she began to realize that she didn't really know the person she married. I think we'll be just fine.

Separation with children doesn't have to be a bad thing. It's a lot of work and I know FI's mom sacrificed a lot to be able to raise him on her own, but I think he turned out to be a wonderful man. Your friend can raise a wonderful man too with the help and support of her family.