Weddings

pinkcow13

I'm bored, it's wedding season, so I thought why not talk weddings?

What was your wedding like? Or what will it be like? I'm more curious about the reception part. I don't want a garter toss, traditional bouquet toss (much to the dismay of FMIL who said I am "ruining the wedding" by not having these) or cake smash. I'm warming up to the idea of line dances because while I don't particularly like them, people do. I also know our crowd does. So I'm thinking of maybe playing 2 of the more modern ones (no Electric Slide, I detest that song).

I'd like speeches at the wedding to only be from the MOH and FI's BM (he has 2) - only if they'd like to, of course. Anything more than that I think might be a bit much. Parent dances, and I was thinking of that tradition at some weddings in which the couple who has been together the longest stays standing (and this will include all couples, not just married or engaged couples). Is this a good one that people generally like, or would it be too exclusive to single guests?

I think I will toss my bouquet at the end of the party, but I will have everyone catch it, not just the "single ladies" - and most certainly not with that song playing. Father of the Bride style.  I love pictures, so if the budget allows, I'd like a photobooth. Our crowd also loves pictures, so it will go over really well. Our venue is on a lake and rents gondolas so our guests can go on gondola rides with a gondolier (also, if the budget allows). 

Now, share your wedding stories, ideas, or suggestions!

sarawifenow

For our reception, we will be doing the "traditions". Cake cutting, garter/bouquet toss, first dance, mother/son, and (in my case) uncle/niece dances. I originally thought of doing the couple dance, but I decided against it. My grandfather and my godfather passed away recently, and I know that it would kill my grandma and aunt to know that they should be dancing up there with them. Our reception is in the afternoon, so there won't be a TON of dancing. Just lots of good food and good company. Certainly, if people want to dance, I won't complain! ETA: I swear I put paragraphs in here.

gladyscf

At my first wedding, instead of tossing the bouquet, I gave it to the wife of the longest married couple. She loved that.

ETF: Because today sucks.

Jells2dot0

My wedding was exactly like I wanted- we exchanged vows on an extremely remote beach with only the photographer, celebrant, and coordinator present. There was absolutely nothing traditional about it apart from the ceremony (vows, rings, kiss). It was quiet, calm, personal, and intimate. We had a private dinner later that night, exchanged small gifts, and enjoyed a lot of champagne

Perfection.

beachyone15

mrsstatic2b said:

At my first wedding, instead of tossing the bouquet, I gave it to the wife of the longest married couple. She loved that.

ETF: Because today sucks.

I love this idea!

Inkdancer

We're gonna put lottery tickets on the bouquet and garter. I won't be wearing the garter we throw. So everyone will be invited up for the throws, which we'll probably do at the same time.

Since it's a lunch reception, not a whole ton of dancing. Just chilling and eating good food.

VulgarGirl

We're skipping the garter toss, I don't want to wear one and FI's wearing pants so it'd make getting it off hard. Though I read something about a lesbian couple getting married to opted to skip the garter toss because they didn't want to make people uncomfortable seeing two women doing something vaguely sexual, they did a hug instead of a kiss at the alter as well. Reading that I kind of wanted to do a garter toss just in case anyone got the dumb idea we were skipping it for shitty reasons like that. We are totally kissing at the alter. 

I've been thinking about doing a bouquet with lottery scratchers and then letting everyone try to catch it. I like throwing things. But right now I'm not even sure either of us will have bouquets. We're both walking with both our parents so we'll be holding their hands so we won't be able to carry the flowers, then we won't hold them when were up there...I dunno just not seeing how it'd work it or why it's important. 

We're going to have line dances. I freaking love them. And I'm really not thinking of many "do not play" songs. I love cheesy music. And our DJ is good, I kind of just trust him to do his thing. 

There's going to be so much dessert. We aren't even 100% sure on dinner yet, but we're doing a cake, boozy cupcakes, a candy bar, cookies for favors, it's just...so much dessert. I've very excited by it.

I'd love a photo booth. Not sure yet if we'll do one or if we can find a place in our venue to park it, but I love them. 

ETA: We are doing the father/daughter dance. We're both going to do it at the same time and for FI she's going to swap out her dad for her step-dad at some point. I love dancing with my dad. Our dads are working together to find a song they like. 

pinkcow13

mrsstatic2b said:

At my first wedding, instead of tossing the bouquet, I gave it to the wife of the longest married couple. She loved that.

ETF: Because today sucks.

Jells2dot0 - your wedding sounds so lovely and amazing. 

Ours will be an evening reception, so there will be tons of dancing. Especially within our crowd lol.

JCbride2015

I like this thread idea.  Sometimes we spend so much time convincing people not to do things wrong, we don't talk as much about what we're doing right!

Our wedding will be very traditional, big, dinner and dancing, but with a few twists.  Fi and I both love history and nature.  So our venue is a historical building, originally built in the 20's as a scenic overlook in a county park.  It's now run as a restaurant and has an upstairs ballroom, where our wedding will be held.  It will be very formal: valet, white glove service, live music, etc.  But the surroundings are rustic and natural: big lawns, hiking trails, view down the mountain to NYC.  We didn't want one of those NJ "wedding factories."

We will be doing parent dances, although I feel a little weird about dancing with my dad because we never had a reason to dance together before.  No garter toss, but I'll toss the bouquet.  I was also thinking of doing the couple dance and I think it's a nice way to honor the longest relationships.

climbingsingle

My wedding is in 3 months. 

We're introducing our parents and wedding party into the reception before us. We'll then do our first dance (Come Away With Me by Norah Jones). And then I will dance with my dad while FI dances with his mom. We're not doing two separate dances. I think for this dance, I'm choosing Stand By Me. 

MOH and BM will each give a speech. 

We're not doing a bouquet toss or garter toss. We're also not having a traditional wedding cake, so no cake cutting. We're having a dessert buffet with items provided by my job (cheesecake, layer cakes). 

We're having a photo booth. I'm figuring that will be the wedding favors. 

It's an afternoon wedding, but I'm really hoping people will still dance. 

afox007

Our reception will probably have most of the traditions, though we are leaning towards not doing any tosses unless we steal the idea to attach lottery tickets. 

I was thinking of doing the couples dance and have the couple that had been together the longest get the bouquet, but realized my grandparents would have been together the longest if my grandpa was still here. It would strike a nerve with FMIL as well; she got married to FI's step dad in her late 40's and he has been having some major medical issues. I could see her taking it as us rubbing it in that she'll be lucky to see their 20 year anniversary. 

emmaaa

The ceremony is in a church and our reception will be held at a different venue about five miles away. .We will do our first dance, mother and son dance, and father and daughter dance. Then I think to get the crowd dancing, we'll play a line dance song (Copperhead Road, such a great song an dance) and then just some music playing. 

We will cut the cake but will absolutely not be smashing it in eachother's faces. This has already been agreed upon. We aren't planning to do a garter or bouquet toss as we don't have many single friends (I like the idea of giving the bouquet to the longest married couple).

I want the reception to just be fun and laid back. We'll have a couple of cornhole boards outside and a fire in the fire pit.

Our crowd isn't super dance-y so I think it will be more of people just hanging out, which is what we are going for.

pinkcow13

MagicInk - Your deserts sounds amazing. Boozy cupcakes?! Sign me up!

We don't have a DJ yet, but I think there will only be like 3 songs on the Do not play list, the damn electric slide will be one of them lol. I think we might have more of a "You HAVE to play this!" list. At least I will. I love so many songs!

The lottery ticket bouquets are a really cool idea. Who doesn't love lottery tickets?!

pinkcow13

JCbride2015ClimbingBrideNY people will most likely dance. I went to an afternoon wedding last weekend, and there was a lot of dancing! We are now deciding if we want to do a traditional wedding cake, or a cupcake tower.

SmileDamnit

Our wedding is in 30 days...squuueeeee!!!

It's going to be fairly non-traditional. Family only (29, including me & FI) and the ceremony will be taking place lakeside, in the backyard of a gorgeous house we've rented on Flathead Lake in Montana. We will be doing first look and hope to get all the misc. family pics done before the ceremony so everyone can enjoy the cocktail hour and lawn games. My step-sister-in-law will be officiating and we hope to keep the ceremony super sweet. Only my sister and soon-to-be step son will be standing up with us.

The reception is across the lake at a super cute little smoke house and we have our own patio area that is covered with a shit ton of beautiful flowers so we won't need much in the way of decor. No dance floor/dj, garter toss, formal cake cutting (but damn, am I excited for our cake!), yada yada yada. We will rather just spend the evening eating, drinking and socializing with our nearest and dearest. 

I can't. freakin'. WAIT!!!

climbingsingle

pinkcow13 said:

JCbride2015ClimbingBrideNY people will most likely dance. I went to an afternoon wedding last weekend, and there was a lot of dancing! We are now deciding if we want to do a traditional wedding cake, or a cupcake tower.

I hope you're right! I do have a lot of friends that love to dance. 

VulgarGirl

pinkcow13 said:

MagicInk - Your deserts sounds amazing. Boozy cupcakes?! Sign me up!

We don't have a DJ yet, but I think there will only be like 3 songs on the Do not play list, the damn electric slide will be one of them lol. I think we might have more of a "You HAVE to play this!" list. At least I will. I love so many songs!

The lottery ticket bouquets are a really cool idea. Who doesn't love lottery tickets?!

Right? You get to scratch something, and you might win money! Our favors are going to be three cookies from our favorite bakery and a scratcher ticket. So no matter, you go home with something sweet.

SBmini

My reception was a timing nightmare.

We didn't do a garter toss, bouquet toss or even cut the cake. My florist fucked up and didn't put flowers on the cake so when my DOC came over at midnight to ask if we wanted to cut it before the photographer left I told her no. I wasn't going to stop the dancing to have people look at the ugly cake. I told her to just serve it. Silver lining- because they waited so late to serve the cake that they only needed the sheet cakes. My 3 tier cake was completely untouched! The next day, we put flowers on it like it was supposed to have, opened a bottle of champagne, cut and ate our cake.

I was pretty upset about the timing of the reception. Food was served way too late and dancing started too late as well. I kept trying to get my DOC to reorganize things, but she wouldn't. She was useless. But everyone had fun and we had a ton of appetizers so no one was starving regardless of the fact that dinner wasn't served until 10 pm. 

I also didn't have a money dance. Which my parents tried to force on me to the point of telling both my DOC and DJ that we were doing one and announcing we were doing one. I was livid. And am still angry at them two months later. We didn't do a money dance.

Ok- so what was awesome. We had an incredible grand entrance. We started off with American music (Hall and Oats "You Make My Dreams Come True" for the parents and "Home" by Edward Sharpe for the wedding party) but when we came in. The music stopped and we were ushered in by traditional Armenian musicians. Everyone then danced for a solid half hour. I was so worried that my family wouldn't take part, but they did. It was incredible! We also had a fantastic DJ who did such an incredible job of playing both Armenian and English music. So well, in fact, that people would stay on the dance floor even when unfamiliar music started playing. My MIL also surprised us by ordering dancers. It was so over the top and led to the timeline getting screwed up. But it was pretty amazing. We felt like we were in an episode of Game of Thrones, and some people actually started hashtagging #pinkwedding. 

In the end, a lot of my guests reported that it was the most fun wedding they had ever been do. They were unaware of the timing problems, the lack of flowers and for the most part didn't miss anything that didn't happen. Although, a number of aunts and uncles were asking when we were doing the money dance and my sister was upset she didn't have a chance to catch the bouquet. But I valued time with my guests above these silly traditions.

beethery

Evening wedding, right at the beginning of fall next year. Leaves should be on point, so I know all the OOT guests will be going on a leaf-peepin' tour with my parents the day of the wedding. 

Immediate family and small WP-only ceremony (25 minutes max, if that), for benefit of FI, will start at 5:15, with the rest of the guests slated to arrive at 6. Pictures and everything should be done by then, and if the non-family WP members and their SO's want to go ahead and get their dinner and drinks after pictures, I am a bazillion percent ok with that. I know shuffling your feet while you wait for family pics to be done can get boring. Plus, the only SO I don't know really well will probably feel left out, so I'll be more than accomodating if F wants to go ahead and sit down with him and get their grub on.

Everything is pretty much priced out, and we've got our savings plan in place. The one thing I'm having trouble with is the layout.

I haven't gotten the room dimensions of the main part of the town hall, and I want to get everything set up the day before. That's not a big deal. What I'm worried about is where the best place will be for the ceremony. The hall has a stage, so I might just set things up on there, and then when it's reception time, we close the curtain and move on. I think I'm going to go out there for the next event they have there and take my own pictures and measurements.

I bookmarked a FANTASTIC event layout thing (click), plus I got an app where all you do is hold your phone against the wall and it will figure out measurements for you (roomscan on the app store. free!), so I'm going to use that and work all this shit out.

emmaaa

beethery said:

Evening wedding, right at the beginning of fall next year. Leaves should be on point, so I know all the OOT guests will be going on a leaf-peepin' tour with my parents the day of the wedding. 

Immediate family and small WP-only ceremony (25 minutes max, if that), for benefit of FI, will start at 5:15, with the rest of the guests slated to arrive at 6. Pictures and everything should be done by then, and if the non-family WP members and their SO's want to go ahead and get their dinner and drinks after pictures, I am a bazillion percent ok with that. I know shuffling your feet while you wait for family pics to be done can get boring. Plus, the only SO I don't know really well will probably feel left out, so I'll be more than accomodating if F wants to go ahead and sit down with him and get their grub on.

Everything is pretty much priced out, and we've got our savings plan in place. The one thing I'm having trouble with is the layout.

I haven't gotten the room dimensions of the main part of the town hall, and I want to get everything set up the day before. That's not a big deal. What I'm worried about is where the best place will be for the ceremony. The hall has a stage, so I might just set things up on there, and then when it's reception time, we close the curtain and move on. I think I'm going to go out there for the next event they have there and take my own pictures and measurements.

I bookmarked a FANTASTIC event layout thing (click), plus I got an app where all you do is hold your phone against the wall and it will figure out measurements for you (roomscan on the app store. free!), so I'm going to use that and work all this shit out.

OMG that link is perfect!

ElcaB

ClimbingBrideNY said:

My wedding is in 3 months. 

We're introducing our parents and wedding party into the reception before us. We'll then do our first dance (Come Away With Me by Norah Jones). And then I will dance with my dad while FI dances with his mom. We're not doing two separate dances. I think for this dance, I'm choosing Stand By Me. 

SITB:

Dignity100

My wedding is going to be pretty non-traditional.  Destination Wedding @ Disney World; immediate family only.

Ceremony is at 2:30, followed by cake cutting - champagne toasts - first dance; after that is pictures.  We will have somebody help us get our cake to our dinner reception.

Dinner is at 5:15.  We're going to a steakhouse restaurant.  I will have the cake served there with dinner.  I am not guaranteed the semi-private room, but I'm hoping they'll be able to get it for us.

After Dinner we are doing a Dessert Party.  We will meet our escort at Epcot and be taken to our location around 7:45.  Here we will eat our desserts and watch the Illuminations firework show.

There will be no bouquet toss, no garter toss, no dancing beyond the 'first dance'... MAYBE the father/daughter dance and mother/son dance.

theartistformerlyknownas

Another big, traditional shindig over here. Ceremony overlooking the south course of FI's grandfather's country club, which he's belonged to for eons, where they have Thanksgiving dinner every year, where his uncle got married, etc. Cocktail hour following in the newly renovated (!!!) ballroom while we take pictures on the course, including a golf cart with a "Just Married" sign on it (FI's idea). Will have another waiter chasing us down with crab cakes and pork tenderloin so I don't get hangry.

Big plated dinner with FI's Catholic nun great aunt giving the blessing. There will NOT be an unruly outburst from my aunt yelling "WITCHCRAFT! IT'S WITCHCRAFT AND BLASPHEMY!" like she did at my brother's Harry Potter themed wedding when the "blessing" she expected to be Biblical turned out to be a HP reading (LOL). Chicken, salmon, mushroom strudel. No beef, whateva whateva. Lots of cake and cookies, because FI's family is OBSESSED with the cookies at the golf club.

After the dinner... all the traditional dances, including me trying not to sob like a damn fool when I dance with my dad... and then... DUELING PIANOS. Hell yes. SO excited for this! I'm hoping the dancers and the sitters will all be equally entertained. And YES line dancing. AND the chicken dance. 

I think for the bouquet toss I'm going to just have a bunch of flowers tied together with a ribbon, then untie it so all the flowers come apart in midair and everyone gets to catch one (everyone will be invited up, not just the singles). Garter will either be wrapped around a football or have scratch-off tickets attached, and will be purely ceremonial and not actually removed from my body. I might have been ok with it, but my dress is too damn tight and made that decision for me.

AND WE LEAVE THE VERY NEXT DAY FOR SPAIN!!!

ShallowSeas

I'm not sure how to describe our wedding (which is in 2 1/2 months!!!!). Its definitely our own and definitely shows our personalities.  Its somewhat tradition in that we have a wedding party, a traditional processional, I'm wearing a white dress, and I'm walking out to Canon in D because I've always pictured myself walking out to that song. We are having a violinist do the processional songs. Instead of having some kind of unity candle or sand, we are doing Celtic Blessing Stones since FI's family is Celtic. Our recessional song is "Learn Me Right" from the Disney/Pixar movie "Brave".

We are walking into the reception to Dropkick Murphys' "Shipping Up To Boston". We are having a cocktail hour, dinner, and then a popular band in our city who we are friends with will be playing the reception. I'm so excited about this.  We are not doing a garter or bouquet toss. Definitely not a Dollar Dance which was suggested by EVERYONE we know. No thanks.  But we are doing the traditional dances; mother/son, father/daughter, first dance (Tenerife Sea by Ed Sheeran). Lots of beer, lots of dancing, exactly how we wanted it.

Inkdancer

Random thing: ever since Dad and I decided on Johnny Cash's cover of "In My Life" for our dance, I can't hear it without crying.

pinkcow13

@lolo883, dueling pianos sounds so awesome!!! I would totally love that. I also like the idea of the garter toss on a football.

pinkcow13

Inkdancer said:

Random thing: ever since Dad and I decided on Johnny Cash's cover of "In My Life" for our dance, I can't hear it without crying.

Awww, that's really sweet!

KatWAG

I cant believe I have been married for 2+ years. So I would love to rehash our day

We had a Lutheran ceremony.  The pastor didnt let anyone stand when I walked down the aisle, he made a little speech about it before I entered. And then during the sermon he made an off handed jab at gay marriage ::eyeroll:  He wasnt my favorite. The reception was black tie at the library.

We did a first look and took almost all of our pictures before the ceremony,so we were able to enjoy our whole cocktail hour.

After we were introduced we went straight into the cake cutting and first dance. We did this so that the cake could be plated and served after the main course.

We did not do the garter/ bouquet toss. I doubt anyone missed it. We had the tradional dances and speehes. The BM decided to use props for his speech and had a giant picture of H in a speedo for the guests to enjoy...

One weird thing about our wedding was got got married in Chicago when the NATO summit was in town. And we had our reception in the "red zone." There were all kinds of protests and a few bomb threats that weekend. But luckily nothing effected our wedding, except that we were required to hire security and all guests had to show ID.

 

beethery

@severmilli12 Our WP is walking in to 'Whiskey In The Jar' by Metallica! I like Shipping Up To Boston too!

@lolo883 your wedding sounds like it's going to be a fucking blast!

Is anyone doing DIY centerpieces? I found what I'm going to model mine after. I also have to figure out the decor for the rest of the venue beyond the tables. Draping is going to be too expensive for that joint, so I gotta figure out other ways to make things look a little less barren.

lkristenj

I'm using random wine and beer bottles for centerpieces wrapped in ribbons and lace. We just have to clean the bottles off after we drink what's in them.

beachyone15

Ours will likely be traditional. Ceremony in our church, and reception at a country club. I love the idea of the longest couple dance and will probably do a bouquet toss, but no garter toss. Parent dances, cake cutting, etc.

Here in the south, we usually have a groom's cake, but since FI doesn't really like cake (crazy person) we are having a "groom's cookie bar" with milk and takeaway bags for favors. I'm hoping my grandpa doesn't clean out the cookie table, but it's a definite possibility.

FMIL also paid for us to have a string quartet at the reception that plays contemporary music like Coldplay, Katy Perry, etc. I'm pretty excited about that!