Sorry if this is too specific for the “chit chat” board and
sorry for it being so long! We are finding picking an officiate to be a harder
choice than we expected. There are 3 men in our lives that would be honored to
marry us and it would be nice for some outside opinions on what TK experts have
to say.
#1. “Uncle C.”
Uncle C. is not really related, but is closer to my family
than a lot of my “blood” reletives. He and his wife were at the hospital when I
was born and have been a huge part of my life since. Pros: He would probably be
the most honored by us asking, he is a decent speaker (ran a radio show for years
and performs occasionally), and he’ll be at the wedding no matter what. Cons:
He is a semi-professional photographer and, while I’m already hiring a
photographer, I know he probably wants to take some pics himself since it’s his
passion and, hey, free pics for me J.
Also, he is an emotional guy so I would be a little concerned about him crying
during the ceremony.
#2. “Pastor R.”
R is a retired pastor from Ohio (we live in Florida). To
make a long story short, I grew up in Alaska and my parents ran a fishing
charter there. R used to bring a church group up every year and they quickly
became our favorite clients and friends. R. now occasionally comes to visit
with us in Florida. He has been a great counselor to my family during some
crises we’ve had and hard decisions we’ve had to make. He also has been praying
for FI and I’s relationship since we started dating 3 years ago and, during his
last visit (before we were engaged), gave us some premarital counseling. Pros:
As a retired pastor, he’s done over 150 marriages and has “the drill” down
pretty good and he is one of the best speakers I know. Cons: I am not sure if
he would attend the wedding otherwise if we did not ask him to officiate, since
he is OOS, so I would feel it necessary to offer to buy him a ticket in order
not to be rude/burdensome. I am already straining our original budget so
unfortunately, while not a bank breaker, it is still an additional strain.
#3. “Mr. B.”
B teaches a class at FI and I’s church for “young unmarried
adults” that we both attend. He has been a great mentor over the last few years
to the both of us; FI and I are close with his entire family. Pros: B has a good way of being both funny
and serious all at the same time; he would probably fit the bill best to our
“serious-yet-lighthearted, short and sweet ceremony.” He also lives locally, so
no big travel expenses for him. Cons: While he’s spoken and sang in front of
our church numerous times, he gets terrible stage fright. I know he’d still be
honored to do the wedding regardless, but I don’t want him to feel stressed
about it or be shaking like a leaf while he’s up there.
Phew! I feel like this has somehow turned into a game
show…So, what’ll it be: Contestant 1, 2, or 3? 
Thanks for taking the time
to read!