Do newborns need a seat at a reception table?

jenijoyk

Hi all! While our wedding is adults-only, there will be two newborns there (3-4 months old). Do they need their own chair for a baby carrier or something? Or should I just make sure that the parents are seated at tables with fewer chairs (so there is extra room). We are using long, rectangular banquet tables, so I could always leave off the two chairs at the head of the table for those tables where the infants' parents will be seated.

This is probably a really dumb question, but I have zero baby experience, so I have no clue what I should be planning on. I know I can ask the moms their preference when the date approaches, but right now, neither have had their babies yet, both are first time moms, and I'm kind of thinking they will be as clueless as I am right now.

I'd love to hear from anyone that's attended a wedding with a newborn in tow, to let me know how I can be the most accomodating to my new mom guests!

Thanks!

lovesclimbing

I don't have a baby, but I think moms would prefer an extra seat. That way, the baby carrier would be at their level so they don't have to continually lean over (in nice clothes trying to avoid flashing tons of cleavage, keep skirt from riding up depending on what they're wearing) to check on the baby.

jdluvr06

I think it would be best to have an extra seat for the newborns. I'm sure their parents will appreciate it.

chibiyui

Extra seat.

banana468

It's not necessary to have a seat for a 3-4 mo and it's not really safe to rest the infant car seat carrier on one. But extra space at the table would be great.

Jen4948

I would have an extra seat so the parents can put the baby down.  A high chair would be helpful.

pinkshorts27

banana468 said:

It's not necessary to have a seat for a 3-4 mo and it's not really safe to rest the infant car seat carrier on one. But extra space at the table would be great.

Extra seat can also hold the diaper bag or they can move the chair to put a stroller there.

JoanE2012

We had one newborn at our wedding and left extra room at the table and told the mom she could bring the stroller (which she did and was thankful for!).

AlexaF2014

Maybe an extra seat for diaper bag plus space for a stroller? So, two seats?

Also, check with your caterer or whoever is providing your table/chair rentals. I've seen some restaurants that have these... fold-out things for moms to put baby carriers on if they're seated at a table.

RebeccaB88

AlexaF2014 said:

Maybe an extra seat for diaper bag plus space for a stroller? So, two seats?

Also, check with your caterer or whoever is providing your table/chair rentals. I've seen some restaurants that have these... fold-out things for moms to put baby carriers on if they're seated at a table.

This.  You just want to make sure they don't have to put the carrier on the floor. Too easy for waitstaff or other guests to trip over it.

banana468

Jen4948 said:

I would have an extra seat so the parents can put the baby down.  A high chair would be helpful.

Three and four month olds are still bottle fed / nursed so they shouldn't use a high chair.

indianaalum

i would just ask the parent what they preferred. i know that is what i did with my niece. i asked "booster" or "high chair" ..This baby is younger, but the mom will tell you what she needs

LadyMillil

My venue had these weird high chairs that if they are right side up baby can sit in them and if they are upside down they are completely stable, and the perfect size to fit a car seat, with protection to keep the car seat from being knocked off. My BFF had a 3 week old at my wedding. I seated her at the end of the table, with the high chair next to her. The DOC arranged to have a server help her situate the car seat on the high chair to see if BFF was okay with the set up. The server had instructions to remove the high chair if BFF didn't like it and wanted a regular chair or to bring in the stroller. 

Definitely ask the venue if they have any suggestions for the babies, and ask your friends closer to your date if they have a preference.

Sugargirl1019

I don't think mom should be putting the carrier on a chair. It is dangerous to put a baby carrier on the chair not made for it. It could be too big for the chair and fall off. Just thinking about safety for the baby.

Other options: stroller, high chair thing to set the carrier in, or those fold out hammock things mentioned by a previous poster. Talk with your venue to make sure you can provide safe seating for the baby.

(We have those chiavari (?) chairs and the seat is WAY too small for the carrier to be safe and secure. Venue is providing the high chair to set the carrier in.)

lyndausvi

as a potential guest sitting at the table I would appreciate an extra spot for the baby.  A 3-6 month old will not be in a high chair, but they still take up some room.   Even if it's a little extra space for the mom adjusting her hold on the baby.

theartistformerlyknownas

Another vote to leave a space wide enough for the stroller to be pushed up to the table. This will be the safest/most comfortable option for the baby and convenient if Mom doesn't want to hold/sling them all night. Ideally, I'd put them at a table where the stroller can back up to a wall rather than an aisle between tables.

Sister brought my nephew to our cousin's wedding when he was about 3 months old, and there were only seats for the adults. She had just enough room to squeeze his stroller in behind us, but didn't want to sit with her back to him all night. Plus it made it impossible for anyone else to get up without bumping into the stroller/stroller bumping into other people. We passed bebe around all night, which I was ok with because NEWBABYTOHOLD but it would have been really inconvenient for my sister if she wasn't at a table of all willing family members.

jenijoyk

Thanks guys! I'll talk to the venue and the new moms (once they've had their babies - any day now!!! - and have had time to figure out what they'd want. But it sounds like right now I should plan on taking a few tables down from 12 seats to 10 seats (don't worry, they are long specialty rectangular tables, not rounds) to make sure there's some stroller room, and making sure the stroller spot isn't in an aisle where it will be get bumped or block people in! THanks for the great insight!

ashleyep

jenijoyk said:

Thanks guys! I'll talk to the venue and the new moms (once they've had their babies - any day now!!! - and have had time to figure out what they'd want. But it sounds like right now I should plan on taking a few tables down from 12 seats to 10 seats (don't worry, they are long specialty rectangular tables, not rounds) to make sure there's some stroller room, and making sure the stroller spot isn't in an aisle where it will be get bumped or block people in! THanks for the great insight!

My cousin just had a baby and I asked her if she would want an extra chair or anything and she didn't sound too concerned about it. Someone's probably going to be holding him most of the night with all our family there!

mysticl

ashleyep said:

jenijoyk said:

Thanks guys! I'll talk to the venue and the new moms (once they've had their babies - any day now!!! - and have had time to figure out what they'd want. But it sounds like right now I should plan on taking a few tables down from 12 seats to 10 seats (don't worry, they are long specialty rectangular tables, not rounds) to make sure there's some stroller room, and making sure the stroller spot isn't in an aisle where it will be get bumped or block people in! THanks for the great insight!

My cousin just had a baby and I asked her if she would want an extra chair or anything and she didn't sound too concerned about it. Someone's probably going to be holding him most of the night with all our family there!

If this is her first and he's brand new she may not have experienced all the logistical issues that can come up.  My first few times out with DS I'd get somewhere and all of a sudden be like "wait, how do I handle this", heck he's almost 22 months and I still have those moments sometimes.  

ashleyep

mysticl said:

ashleyep said:

jenijoyk said:

Thanks guys! I'll talk to the venue and the new moms (once they've had their babies - any day now!!! - and have had time to figure out what they'd want. But it sounds like right now I should plan on taking a few tables down from 12 seats to 10 seats (don't worry, they are long specialty rectangular tables, not rounds) to make sure there's some stroller room, and making sure the stroller spot isn't in an aisle where it will be get bumped or block people in! THanks for the great insight!

My cousin just had a baby and I asked her if she would want an extra chair or anything and she didn't sound too concerned about it. Someone's probably going to be holding him most of the night with all our family there!

If this is her first and he's brand new she may not have experienced all the logistical issues that can come up.  My first few times out with DS I'd get somewhere and all of a sudden be like "wait, how do I handle this", heck he's almost 22 months and I still have those moments sometimes.  

That's true. He's her first and he was born at 34 weeks so he's still in the hospital (only a week old!) I'll probably make sure that there's room at her table to squeeze in a high chair for the carrier.

theartistformerlyknownas

ashleyep said:

mysticl said:

ashleyep said:

jenijoyk said:

Thanks guys! I'll talk to the venue and the new moms (once they've had their babies - any day now!!! - and have had time to figure out what they'd want. But it sounds like right now I should plan on taking a few tables down from 12 seats to 10 seats (don't worry, they are long specialty rectangular tables, not rounds) to make sure there's some stroller room, and making sure the stroller spot isn't in an aisle where it will be get bumped or block people in! THanks for the great insight!

My cousin just had a baby and I asked her if she would want an extra chair or anything and she didn't sound too concerned about it. Someone's probably going to be holding him most of the night with all our family there!

If this is her first and he's brand new she may not have experienced all the logistical issues that can come up.  My first few times out with DS I'd get somewhere and all of a sudden be like "wait, how do I handle this", heck he's almost 22 months and I still have those moments sometimes.  

That's true. He's her first and he was born at 34 weeks so he's still in the hospital (only a week old!) I'll probably make sure that there's room at her table to squeeze in a high chair for the carrier.

Keep in mind the high chairs that most restaurants try to use upside down as an infant carrier "stand" are NOT SAFE. That is not what they're intended to be used for and they're not stable that way. That's why I recommend the stroller... chances are she already has the kind of stroller that the carrier snaps into, and may plan on bringing it anyway to get babe in from the car.

mysticl

ashleyep said:

mysticl said:

ashleyep said:

jenijoyk said:

Thanks guys! I'll talk to the venue and the new moms (once they've had their babies - any day now!!! - and have had time to figure out what they'd want. But it sounds like right now I should plan on taking a few tables down from 12 seats to 10 seats (don't worry, they are long specialty rectangular tables, not rounds) to make sure there's some stroller room, and making sure the stroller spot isn't in an aisle where it will be get bumped or block people in! THanks for the great insight!

My cousin just had a baby and I asked her if she would want an extra chair or anything and she didn't sound too concerned about it. Someone's probably going to be holding him most of the night with all our family there!

If this is her first and he's brand new she may not have experienced all the logistical issues that can come up.  My first few times out with DS I'd get somewhere and all of a sudden be like "wait, how do I handle this", heck he's almost 22 months and I still have those moments sometimes.  

That's true. He's her first and he was born at 34 weeks so he's still in the hospital (only a week old!) I'll probably make sure that there's room at her table to squeeze in a high chair for the carrier.

Make sure it is one specifically designed to hold a carrier.  Most are not and it is very dangerous to put a carrier on one of those.  The slightest bump or even the baby moving could cause it to fall off.  Depending on how it lands the baby could be injured, especially if they loosened or undid the straps thinking they didn't need them since they weren't in the car.  

ashleyep

ETA: nvm.

Simply Fated

Most high chairs in restaurants and places like that are not designed to hold carriers. So many times parents will even turn them upside down to hold the carrier. While some ARE designed for that, others are not. And even then, they become top heavy. It doesn't help that not all carriers are the same. Some venues will warn the parents about their high chairs, some may not. And I've seen parents argue with hosts at restaurants that, "we've done this before, it's fine." Idiots.


OP, I like your plan to ask the parents after their kids are born. You can check with the venue and arrange for what they prefer.

mysticl

Simply Fated said:

Most high chairs in restaurants and places like that are not designed to hold carriers. So many times parents will even turn them upside down to hold the carrier. While some ARE designed for that, others are not. And even then, they become top heavy. It doesn't help that not all carriers are the same. Some venues will warn the parents about their high chairs, some may not. And I've seen parents argue with hosts at restaurants that, "we've done this before, it's fine." Idiots. OP, I like your plan to ask the parents after their kids are born. You can check with the venue and arrange for what they prefer.

Yeah, the high chairs should have a label on them saying if it's designed for it or not but those can get torn off or damaged.  I've also seen restaurant staff turn the high chair over and tell the parent to put the carrier on it when it was clearly unstable.  

jenijoyk

Yes - definitely no high chairs! That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. Especially given our venue is outdoors in a courtyard and the ground below the reception tables will be brick and cement.

I might be baby-ignorant, but I definitely do not want any wobbly baby carriers balanced on anything, and dear god I hope my cater would know better! I'll let the parents know they will have room for a stroller at the reception tables if they'd like to bring one.

Thank you everyone for your ideas and input! I feel much better that it will all be good now.

Viczaesar

jenijoyk said:

Thanks guys! I'll talk to the venue and the new moms (once they've had their babies - any day now!!! - and have had time to figure out what they'd want. But it sounds like right now I should plan on taking a few tables down from 12 seats to 10 seats (don't worry, they are long specialty rectangular tables, not rounds) to make sure there's some stroller room, and making sure the stroller spot isn't in an aisle where it will be get bumped or block people in! THanks for the great insight!

You sound like a gracious and conscientious host.  Stick around!

jenijoyk

Thanks - I'm trying, anyway! I'm sure I'm making faux pas right and left on wedding stuff everyday.... landmines everywhere, it seems like!

These are my first friends to have babies, so I'm uber excited!!! Plus, I figure the happier the parents are, the longer they will stay at my reception!