How to list Dad's fiancee, will be wife on invite?

PrincessOfHavoc

My dad has recently gotten engaged to his wonderful lady friend, they've been together for 4 years. They're going to be married before my wedding, basically as soon as Dad's suit is finished with alterations, so before we mail invites. She's a very sweet lady who has brought a ton of joy back to Dad after Mom died. I'm really looking forward to having an actual step mother who I can beg advice from - I do already, but felt a bit off asking for really personal advice because I'm weird. She's been a great help with my wedding.

But how do I include her on our invitations?

Doctor Rex Havoc
Ms Love Chaos
and
DF's parents, and so on

Or

Doctor and Mrs Rex Havoc and so on.

Or any other wording?

I know she's not raised me, but she's important to me and she finds me to be her child of her heart and finally being a mother has been a joy to her. I feel it's right to include her, even if it's a minor etiquette violation.

southernbelle0915

It sounds like his parents and your dad/future stepmom are both hosting. If that is the case, would you be comfortable with:

"Together with their families..."? 

That is, if you would consider her part of your family and she yours.. 

theartistformerlyknownas

I went with "together with their families" to cover my divorced/both remarried parents and his widowed/remarried mom. If you want to list their names, just ask them whether they'd rather me Dr and Mrs or Dr/Ms.

CMGragain

Who is hosting your wedding?

CMGragain

You haven't given us the information we need.  Hosting?  If your father is hosting, and it is not a church wedding it might be this:

Doctor and Mrs. John Bridesfather
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of his daughter
Bride's First Middle
to
Mr. Groom's Full Name
Day, date
time o'clock
Venue
Address
City, State

Reception to follow.  (This is only if the reception is in the same place as the ceremony.)

The groom's parents do not normally appear on the invitation unless they are hosting the wedding.

PrincessOfHavoc

All our parents are hosting. It is a church wedding also. And I'm weird, but together with their family doesn't seem right.

She will be Mrs. Havoc, so Doctor and Mrs Rex Havoc is what we're using.

So....

Doctor and Mrs Rex Havoc
and
Mr and Mrs Duke Mayhem, Esq
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of
River Valkyrie
and
Matt
on the thirty first day of October, two thousand and fourteen
at half past six o'clock
Church
Address
City, State

Reception is at another location, so that's going on an enclosure card with reception location, shuttle and parking information, and our website since I know we have guests who will RSVP online so we're giving them the option. It's eliminate a lot of phone calls. Plus, website has more information on dinner so people can make sure they're not getting anything they don't like.

MyNameIsNot

Esq. doesn't go on social correspondence.  That's professional only.  Otherwise, you have it.  

CMGragain

On wedding invitations, time is usually written as "half after", not "half past".  No "and" between the two sets of parents' names.  Traditionally "honour" is spelled British style, but this is no longer required.

Doctor and Mrs. Rex Havoc
Mr. and Mrs. Duke Mayhem
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of
River Valkyrie
and
Matt Mayham
Saturday, the thirty-first day of October
two thousand and fourteen
at half after six o'clock
Church
Address
City, State

Jen4948

CMGragain said:

Traditionally "honour" is spelled British style, but this is no longer required.

Really?  I've always seen both you and Miss Manners use "honour" only.

CMGragain

I use it because of tradition.  You know I am traditional, and so is Miss Manners.  Emily Post and Crane's both allow the American spelling, though.  It is like the "and" in the year,  They don't agree, so I don't correct it.