Help with Proofreading

Knottie37373131

I think I have finally made my decision and finished my invitations on Vista print. We are getting married in Jamaica just the two of us 15 days before the reception and are having a luncheon/reception 11-2pm. I want to make sure everything reads correctly.

Thank you!

Knottie37373131

The bottom of the save the date will also have "For more information" Please visit our wedding website address.

CMGragain

I do hope that you are not trying to recreate a wedding reception.  That is something you gave up when you decided to have a private destination ceremony.  Wedding activities would not be appropriate.

If you are simply having a party to celebrate your marriage, then I would suggest a few changes.  It sounds like an open house event with the time listed as eleven to two o'clock.  Do you want your guests to arrive at 11:00AM?  If so, the just put "eleven o'clock".  I would recommend dropping the word "reception", and invite people to a "luncheon".    The word "will" at the top should not be capitalized.  Actually, I would change that wording entirely, to "The pleasure of your comany is requested at luncheon to celebrate their marriage."  The "..in their honor." seems a bit inappropriate, unless someone else is hosting.  You do not host a party in your own honor.

This is a personal opinion, but I absolutely detest the "Eat, drink, and be married" at the bottom.  Ew!  That joke was old 40 years ago, when I was a bride.  Really tacky!  Please take that off your invitation.

I would do the whole thing differently if I was writing this invitation.  First, I would have proper wedding announcements pre-printed and pre-addressed to be sent out as soon as you are married.  You could have a relative mail them for you from the USA to save postage costs.

Bride's Full Name
and
Groom's Full Name
announce their marriage
May 15, 2015
Town, Jamaica

Then you send out invitations to your celebration party separately.

Mr. and Mrs. John Bridegroom
request the pleasure of your company
to celebrate their recent marriage
Saturday, the thirtieth of May
at eleven o'clock in the morning
Restaurant
Address
City, State

Your way works fine.  This is just traditional.  I hope I helped. 

CMGragain

One more thought.  You are not inviting guests to your wedding or your wedding reception.  Therefore, gifts are not expected at a party.  You shouldn't register for gifts.  Sorry!

Knottie37373131

We will are having our 'celebration' 15 days after we get back from our destination. So we don't really have time to send out wedding announcements.

No, we are not trying to recreate a wedding reception. We are doing a laid back casual nice luncheon to celebrate our wedding. I am not wearing my wedding dress, I will be wearing either a mint green or white cocktail dress. I will be doing a guest book as we are having 30-50 people. We will not be having a wedding cake, but I will have cupcake favors in nice boxes for people to take home if they would like.

I am trying to find something to make the bottom not so empty, as the template does not let me move the whole design down. Is there anything else besides the eat, drink, be married that may be more appropriate?

Is this one better?

Knottie37373131

or

request the pleasure of your

company at luncheon to

celebrate their marriage to take place on

May 15, 2015 in Jamaica.

Knottie37373131

CMGragain

I think that one is more confusing.  How about keeping your original format?

Jessica Name
and
Joshua Name
will be married on May 15, 2015
Town, Jamaica
________

The pleasure of your company is requested
to celebrate their marriage
at luncheon
Saturday, the thirtieth of May
two thousand fifteen
________

Restaurant
Address
City, State

(heart)

That makes everything very clear.  I'm not a fan of the big numerical date, but you can use it if you really want to.  I think that it is a lovely invitation design, and I don't really think you need to add anything at the bottom.  I am a big fan of Vistaprint!  Don't capitalize anything but the proper nouns and the first word of a sentence.  It should flow just like any writing.
Your plans sound lovely!  Don't forget to show off honeymoon photos!

Knottie37373131

Thanks!

I actually am not crazy about the numerical date either but there are two permanent dots there that I cannot delete. I am choosing vista print mostly because of the price and I want something affordable for our event. I also have finally found a decent design that I can use for matching save the dates, and thank you cards.

Because of the dots I am able to change the date as long as I do it in a bold font. Does that look okay?

CMGragain

I like it!

Knottie37373131

@CMGragain . . . so sorry . . I am at this again.

I think I like this one a lot better, what do you think?

Thanks so much!

CMGragain

There is a typo in the first line.  I would simplify it a little:

Jessica Full Name
and
Joshua Full Name
will be married in Jamaica
on May 15, 2015
-----------

The pleasure of your company is requested
to celebrate their marriage at luncheon

Saturday, the thirtieth of May
two thousand fifteen
at eleven o'clock

Lighthouse Restaurant
Address
City, State

Do not capitalize the year or the time.  It should read like one long sentence.  I like the look of your invitation, and you are making it very clear that this is not your wedding, but a celebration of your marriage.  In general, you do not give any details (private ceremony) about your wedding in a marriage announcement, which is what the top of your invitation really is.  However, at your luncheon, everybody will want to see pictures and hear details, and that is perfectly fine!  Best wishes!

Knottie37373131

This is what it will look like once printed. I did not want something that looked super elegant and formal as we are not inviting people to the wedding but the "celebration". I am liking this a lot better than the last invitation that I was working on. The overall appearance is much better.

Thanks so much for helping me proofread!

CMGragain

You're welcome.  I like this one better, too!