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Bridal Shower "Invite"

doeydodoeydo member
Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
in Snarky Brides
I went to my sister's wedding shower today (which was nice) and on the ride home I stopped at a corner store in a small town.  They had a bulletin board with little signs for garage sales and other local stuff.  Anyways, I noticed one of the papers said "Anne Smith's Bridal Shower!  Date, Time, Place".  WTF?  Is this a thing now?  Obviously they aren't following the rule of those invited to pre-wedding parties must be invited to the wedding (unless an advertisement for the wedding is going to posted, too).  How is the host supposed to know how many people are coming?  
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Re: Bridal Shower "Invite"

  • mysticlmysticl member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer

    doeydo said:
    I went to my sister's wedding shower today (which was nice) and on the ride home I stopped at a corner store in a small town.  They had a bulletin board with little signs for garage sales and other local stuff.  Anyways, I noticed one of the papers said "Anne Smith's Bridal Shower!  Date, Time, Place".  WTF?  Is this a thing now?  Obviously they aren't following the rule of those invited to pre-wedding parties must be invited to the wedding (unless an advertisement for the wedding is going to posted, too).  How is the host supposed to know how many people are coming?  
    It might be a small town thing and not a new thing but a the way it's always been done thing.  
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  • mrsmorales2bemrsmorales2be mod
    500 Comments 250 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper

    Yeah - coming from a small town you see this kind of thing a lot.  Not proper etiquette, of course, but one of those things that are peculiar to small towns and won't ever change. 

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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I have never seen it, but someone posted about it recently, so it must be a thing for some people. How ridiculous.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • sarahuflsarahufl member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    My father's secretary, who worked for him for about 30 years, recently got upset that he missed her daughter's wedding. My dad said he never got an invite, or else he would have loved to be there.

    Turns out, she posted it on the board in the break room. My dad just thought it was an announcement, but it was an actual invite. It is a small town thing, for sure- but it seems like a nightmare when it comes to properly preparing to host people.

    My parents sent a gift and a card later, once they realized they had been "invited".
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  • goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    There was a discussion about this sort of thing on another board about Stag & Does and how you could see postings at gas stations about them in small town Ontario, but I didn't think it would extend to something like a shower.  "Hey, who the hell are you?"  "A trucker that saw your invite!  I brought a food processor!"  Ugh...
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  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Yea, I feel like it's a small town thing. I grew up in a town of about 3,000, now live in a town of about 7,000.  A week after H and I moved here, there was a notice in the church program saying, "come celebrate Humphrey and Odessa's wedding."  Where I grew up, I remember at least two weddings that were invite-the-town weddings complete with notices stuck on bulletin boards!
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  • wajohnson09wajohnson09 member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    It's a small town thing.

    When I was growing up an announcement about the shower would go in the small town weekly paper and the Sunday church bulletin.

    Ditto on the posting invitation on the work bulletin board. Or you will get an invite in the mail and no RSVP card. The reception food is prepared by the bride's family, bar is cash, and no one thinks anything of it
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  • IrishPirate60IrishPirate60 member
    Seventh Anniversary 250 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    Am I the only one who remembers when wedding banns were posted at the local church for three weeks? It was an announcement of the intent to marry (though not an invitation) and also a notice to let someone know if you knew why the couple shouldn't be married!
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  • chasseusechasseuse member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper First Anniversary
    My banns are being posted now!

    It's definitely a small town thing. MY FI's family is from a town of 250 people! They do "open house" birthday parties and celebratory events in the church hall. Everyone filters through and has good food. (No booze--it's a dry town!) It's just the way they do things.
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  • Marzipan13Marzipan13 member
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    IrishPirate60 said:
    Am I the only one who remembers when wedding banns were posted at the local church for three weeks? It was an announcement of the intent to marry (though not an invitation) and also a notice to let someone know if you knew why the couple shouldn't be married!
    I didn't know that was the history behind them, but yes, my church still puts marriage banns in the bulletin!  Knowing my mom, she'll want to keep the 3 bulletins that our names are written in leading up to the wedding... :) 
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  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    IrishPirate60 said:
    Am I the only one who remembers when wedding banns were posted at the local church for three weeks? It was an announcement of the intent to marry (though not an invitation) and also a notice to let someone know if you knew why the couple shouldn't be married!

    ours were!




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  • kerbohlkerbohl member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    IrishPirate60 said:
    Am I the only one who remembers when wedding banns were posted at the local church for three weeks? It was an announcement of the intent to marry (though not an invitation) and also a notice to let someone know if you knew why the couple shouldn't be married!
    I had to have my banns posted in both my church and my husband's for three weeks, and have them verbally spoken out by the pastor, or I wouldn't be able to legally get married (using wedding banns - the other route is paperwork). It's another way to make it legal in Canada, I don't know how it is in the states.

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