Bridal Party Budget

tlc9615

I am recently engaged and plan on asking my future bridal party to be in the wedding over the next two weeks. I want to have as much transparency from all of the girls in regards to what a comfortable budget is for them so I can be conscious of this when making decisions about dresses etc. Do any of you have tips on how to have this conversation with them? Thanks in advance!

climbingsingle

Ask each of them separately what they're comfortable with spending. 

Maggie0829

Make sure to ask each girl to be your BM separately.  When you ask in a group setting people can feel pressured to say yes when really they want to say no.

As for their budget.  Again, when it gets closer to buying a dress, ask each girl separately what their budget is.  Which ever number is the lowest is your budget.  Also, keep in mind alteration costs so you may even want to stay lower then the lowest number so that those additional costs can be factored in.

As for everything else, shoes, makeup, hair, jewelry...those should be the choice of each individual girl.  You can certainly say "wear any nude shoe you want" but anything more specific then you need to foot the bill.

Also keep in mind that bridal showers and bach parties are optional so if your BMs (or anyone else for that matter) don't throw you one then it isn't the end of the world.

ETA:  When is your wedding?  You really shouldn't ask your BMs until you are no more then a year out (and that is pushing it).  A lot can change between now and your wedding and once you ask you can't unask.

southernbelle0915

tlc9615 said:

I am recently engaged and plan on asking my future bridal party to be in the wedding over the next two weeks. I want to have as much transparency from all of the girls in regards to what a comfortable budget is for them so I can be conscious of this when making decisions about dresses etc. Do any of you have tips on how to have this conversation with them? Thanks in advance!

Congrats! Ask each BM privately what their budget is for a dress. Not: "I'm thinking about this $150 dress, is that ok?" But "how much are you comfortable spending on your dress?"

Then go with the lowest budget for your shopping. Other than that, there aren't any other costs associated with their role as BM, so you should be good to go!

djfivenine

southernbelle0915 said:

tlc9615 said:

I am recently engaged and plan on asking my future bridal party to be in the wedding over the next two weeks. I want to have as much transparency from all of the girls in regards to what a comfortable budget is for them so I can be conscious of this when making decisions about dresses etc. Do any of you have tips on how to have this conversation with them? Thanks in advance!

Congrats! Ask each BM privately what their budget is for a dress. Not: "I'm thinking about this $150 dress, is that ok?" But "how much are you comfortable spending on your dress?"

Then go with the lowest budget for your shopping. Other than that, there aren't any other costs associated with their role as BM, so you should be good to go!

I get your point, but this isn't completely accurate.  The bride should never ask for budget info for showers, bachelorette parties, hair/makeup or anything like that, of course.  But if the main "duty" of a bridesmaid is to "be there on the day" then obviously the bride should at the very least be mindful of the costs of travel for any out of town bridesmaids.  Maybe it's just me, but all 6 of my bridesmaids are OOT, so it's something I'm sensitive to.  The dress is the least of their expenses, compared to travel costs.

southernbelle0915

djfivenine said:

southernbelle0915 said:

tlc9615 said:

I am recently engaged and plan on asking my future bridal party to be in the wedding over the next two weeks. I want to have as much transparency from all of the girls in regards to what a comfortable budget is for them so I can be conscious of this when making decisions about dresses etc. Do any of you have tips on how to have this conversation with them? Thanks in advance!

Congrats! Ask each BM privately what their budget is for a dress. Not: "I'm thinking about this $150 dress, is that ok?" But "how much are you comfortable spending on your dress?"

Then go with the lowest budget for your shopping. Other than that, there aren't any other costs associated with their role as BM, so you should be good to go!

I get your point, but this isn't completely accurate.  The bride should never ask for budget info for showers, bachelorette parties, hair/makeup or anything like that, of course.  But if the main "duty" of a bridesmaid is to "be there on the day" then obviously the bride should at the very least be mindful of the costs of travel for any out of town bridesmaids.  Maybe it's just me, but all 6 of my bridesmaids are OOT, so it's something I'm sensitive to.  The dress is the least of their expenses, compared to travel costs.

Of course they'd need to be there in person if they're in the wedding. This is assumed. Even if they decided to be there in person as a guest, these costs are assumed.

If they're OOT, just tell them in what city the wedding is taking place. If you already know the hotel where you're planning to get a room block and you have your rates set up, you can let them know that too. That might be really helpful for them if they're tight on money and need to more carefully plan a budget.

They might tell you they need time to think about it and crunch some numbers. That's ok.