My BFF is a wedding planner who had a lux wedding funded by family. I found love late in life, so with 2 kids in tow (1each for me and FI), we are trying to plan our wedding. The idea was “just desserts” since we’re far past the appetizers (20’s) and main course (30’s) of life . Also, with having to buy a house for the kids, fund 3 college educations (FI is going back for his degree this Fall) and still funding our future retirement, we have to manage our priorities and budget.
Anyway, the idea was to do just a short dessert reception after our evening church wedding 7 or 7:30 start time. Awesome coffee bar, fruits, tarts, pies, wine, wedding cake and a banana split bar (instead of grooms cake. It’s his FAVORITE). Convo w/ BFF goes like this:
BFF: Nope, gotta feed the people food.
Me: “Nope, can’t afford all that.”
BFF: Then just elope.
[omitting a few particularly thoughtless commentaries from her about my life]
Me: I could do the full dinner thing if I kept it to just immediate parents, siblings and no friends. (I have a large family).
Now here’s the kicker. She asked specifically to be a bridesmaid, which is what I WANT. But if I cut it to just my immediate family to satisfy “proper” hosting of guests, she not only doesn’t stand as an attendant, she wouldn’t be INVITED.
So, I want to know how inappropriate is it to have a dessert-only reception (that is clear on the invitations), with a 1-hour ceremony starting at 7:30, then have dessert-only reception with cake cutting, first dance, toasts and that’s it? I don’t want to improperly host my guests, so honest feedback is welcome.