Vent about Vendors

ladybird29

So...I'm not sure if this is a regional thing (I'm from the midwest, live in the Mid-Atlantic region, and getting married in the South), but I keep getting push back from a lot of my vendors telling me that my reception needs to wrap up around 9:30 (or earlier) because no one will want to stay any later. What's weird is, I keep explaining to them that 99% of my guests are from out of town, that in my circle weddings go until at least 11 pm if not later, and that it shouldn't matter as long as I'm paying you to be there/do what I'm paying you to do. Seriously - I've had at least three of them argue with me about it. One of them is the transportation company we're working with to shuttle guests back to the hotel after the reception. At one point I actually said, "so I can't pay you to stay later? Even if all the guests take the earlier shuttle back? It's not like you're going to lose out on business if no one is there to take it...because I WILL PAY you to stay" and they said they'd get back to me. Photographer is pulling the same stunt. "Since your wedding is at 4:30, we should wrap up around 8:30. 3.5 hours for a reception is really all you need." I feel like I'm going crazy here! Our band is scheduled to play until 11, so what is this person talking about?! When we signed the contracts, I was told they'd be there for as many hours as we'd pay them for, so I don't really understand where this attitude is coming from. I could go on with others, but I think ya'll get the idea here. Just frustrated.

StitelME

OH wow. That has to be super frustrating. My ceremony is at 4:30pm and i have the reception venue booked until 10pm and the DJ and photographers, etc. are staying until 10pm. They didn't even blink an eye. My biggest frustration is that the venue where my ceremony and reception is being held is dragging their feet giving me the final pricing for everything (since we are using their catering). The wedding is a little over 2 weeks out but I haven't received a "final" number yet.

cdn0292

I'm having the same issue with the final numbers. We are about 50 days out and I haven't received a contract with figures since early January... So frustrating. You would think these people would want to get paid.

StitelME

caitdupree said:

I'm having the same issue with the final numbers. We are about 50 days out and I haven't received a contract with figures since early January... So frustrating. You would think these people would want to get paid.

I know right? A part of me feel awful for constantly contacting the coordinator about it - but what else am I supposed to do?

tammym1001

caitdupree said:

I'm having the same issue with the final numbers. We are about 50 days out and I haven't received a contract with figures since early January... So frustrating. You would think these people would want to get paid.

You would think that, but our reception venue (they did the catering) didn't give us a final amount until the Wednesday before our Saturday wedding! Our contract said we had to be paid in full 7 days before the wedding, but that was kind of hard to do when we didn't know how much we owed.

StitelME

tammym1001 said:

caitdupree said:

I'm having the same issue with the final numbers. We are about 50 days out and I haven't received a contract with figures since early January... So frustrating. You would think these people would want to get paid.

You would think that, but our reception venue (they did the catering) didn't give us a final amount until the Wednesday before our Saturday wedding! Our contract said we had to be paid in full 7 days before the wedding, but that was kind of hard to do when we didn't know how much we owed.

This actually makes me feel a little better since I'm under three weeks out and still don't have a final number. They also want full payment by at least one week out but I refuse to write a check if they don't give me a FINAL number.

emmaaa

I don't see this as a regional thing because I'm from the South and weddings last until 11:00. This is really unfortunate for you. Sorry!

Nymeru

My reception lasted until 11. All of my vendors were fine with this and paid to stay until then, however, my WC was VERY pushy about trying to get DH and I to leave early.  She kept saying, "You're tired.  It's time to go." At 9:00 she was trying to get us to go, but we said no, because we weren't doing a grand exit we were going to leave whenever we felt like it.  At 10:00 she told the DJ to play our last dance, so when he announced it, we had no idea what was going on.  We were both very put-out that we were getting effectively kicked out of our own reception.

StitelME

@Nymeru, that sucks so bad. My reception is only planned to go until about 10 but if our "day of" coordinator tried to kick us out, I'd be sending someone to have a word with her (since I've vowed to not participate in anything but enjoying myself and lecturing a vendor does not qualify). I'm surprised she was so pushy about it though, given that you were not having a grand exit.

mschristie123

That's really weird! I've never heard of/been to a wedding ending that early. Ours ended at 12:30 (bar closed at 12, band stopped playing at 12:15). I'm wondering what the vendors would do in light of a Jewish wedding. Those that I've been to start relatively late (7pm ish) and go until at least 1 am. I can't imagine dealing with vendors like that!

sarahufl

I just got married in the south. We had a 1 hour church wedding at 3 and the reception immediately following. We ended at 10 because we had to be out of our venue by 11 and we wanted padding.

A lot of our older guests left around 8:30 or so (which is what our transportation company told us would happen) but the dance floor was still full at 10 and we sort of had to push people onto the trolleys in order to make our timeline.

I would say that out of 170 guests, at least 100 stayed till the end (at 10).

larrygaga

What day are you getting married? Is it a holiday weekend or something? It seems really weird that they all want out a few hours earlier. 

ladybird29

August 30 which does fall over Labor Day weekend. I think if that's the issue though then they should have said something beforehand. Honestly though, from what I keep being told, they really think I'm going to be left with an empty tent after nine because no one stays out late apparently. Sigh...still battling it out.

StitelME

ladybird29 said:

August 30 which does fall over Labor Day weekend. I think if that's the issue though then they should have said something beforehand. Honestly though, from what I keep being told, they really think I'm going to be left with an empty tent after nine because no one stays out late apparently. Sigh...still battling it out.

*SITB* - SO? then you get stuck with an empty tent. Regardless, if you are willing to pay for that then fine. I don't understand why they keep fighting you over it if you are willing to pay for the services provided. Holiday or no holiday - I find this ridiculous.