Wedding Woes

MORNINGGGG!!!

I don't need more coffee, but I want some---so I might be making a run soon.

Randoms:

-My birthday is in 6 days, and H hasn't mentioned it once.  I know it's a little diva-ish to get butt hurt about it, but I'm almost there.  Yep.

-I can't wait for summer to be over so H won't have so much OT, but then again---maybe this never ends?  Ugh.

-I ran last night after dinner, and it was awesome, it wasn't land-speed record worthy, but it was so good for my brain and spirit (yes, squicky).

-SIL was meeting with the banker and ailing gma, along with MIL---came across some account that apparently was setup incorrectly so rather than going to estate or trust it goes to two individuals, she freaked the f*ck out and told H he had to "FIX IT" while he's at work.  H pretty much told her to chill the f*ck out and he'd get to it when he wasn't working, which is Thursday.  I should've told her to just leave it, but she wouldn't have listened anyway.  Oh boy, I have a feeling this is going to get dirty.

Re: MORNINGGGG!!!

  • GBCKGBCK member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    I'd be irked and remind him now--because it's more diva-ish to, in 5 days, have the (justifiable) "WTF do you mean you haven't don ANYTHING for my birthday"? response. (in our house, this would happen by one of us askingthe other to do something "because it's my birthday week". On of the advantages of birthday week. YAY running. I need more caffeine too. I had some, but I need more.
  • I just sat down with coffee.  I was up late last night and this might be a 2 cup day.

    I know DH remembers my bday now, b/c a daily reminder starts about 2 weeks before on our shared calendar (he put it there).  I always want to say something b/c I want it to be fun and special, but I want HIM to remember w/out me reminding him.  So, I kind of appreciate the reminder showing up.  :D

    In other news, I've resigned as president of my freethinkers group.  I'm very sad and I have an overwhelming sense of relief.  I usually have problems letting go of control of things, but I handed over the reins with absolutely no problem.  There has been a lot more drama going on the last few months and I just finally decided that I didn't need this in my life.  The good people are sad I've resigned, the assholes probably are having a celebration and I don't care.

    Apparently, Diva has decided he's not working with me anymore.  He and I got into a really ugly phone call fight about 3 weeks ago.  I'm not particularly pleased with myself b/c it was very unprofessional of me; I completely lost my cool and we yelled at each other for a good 9:43 according to my phone.  However, immediately after he started cutting me out of the last 2/3 cases we had together and gave his new one to his other assistant.  I've spoken with the other 4 partners I work for, made sure that they're happy with my work and that I'll need more hours.  I'm actually quite happy about it; I've said many times that if I didn't have to deal with Diva, I would love my job.  So, for the last two weeks, I've been chipper and happy at work, loving my job.

    So, in this past month I've had the two main stressors in my life drop out and I've had 2 amazing and relaxing weekends out in nature.  Seriously, I feel like a new person.  Now, it's time to start focusing inward a bit.
    0Face6fsn
  • GBCKGBCK member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    giving in to assholes always kinda sucks. But letting go is worth it, IMO
    VarunaTT
  • VarunaTTVarunaTT member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited July 2014
    GB, I used to struggle with that.  But when some of this mess started, one of my very good friends, who I just respect the hell out of, told me, "So this woman thinks she "won".  So what.  Let her think she won.  Do you feel better?  Are you in a better place?  Then you've won, no matter what anyone else thinks.  Stop worrying about about them and worry about yourself".

    Also, being president of assholes?  Not what I want to be (there's some very public, ugly drama going on that I can't get squished and I'm simply not going to be part of).
    0Face
  • GBCKGBCK member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    Yep.  Yep yep yep.  It's so hard.

    Somtimes, it's worth so much to have people change things 'from the inside'--there's tremendous (often unreasonable) guilt to 'abandoning' things and leaving the others inside 'undefended'--but there are the fights you can never ever win.  

    Sometimes acknowledging that 'that way lies madness" is freeing.  I still feel awkward about changing churches but never ever ever enough to go back.  Can't do it.

    Cutting out the stressors is so freeing--it's like finally having the a horrible noise stop--you didn't realize how much it was seeping into all parts of you brain until you're awed by the silence.


    VarunaTT
  • Hee.  I actually told DH, "I know when I'm hitting a brick wall.  But I can't even walk around this, it's like the Great Wall of China!"  
    GBCK
  • 0Face0Face member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    I saw that, V.  I figured it would be a "huzzah" post with a side of sads, but I am happy to see the fact that you recognized that you couldn't change the situation, so you removed yourself.  You tried your damndest.  For real.  It's good you called it when you did (with the group).  As far as Diva goes...woof*ckinghoo!  That is awesome, though it sucks that it took a verbal altercation for it to happen. *shrug*  I guess it is what it is...yes.  VAGUE, but true.

    I'm sure H will remember my birthday, I have to also give myself a hearty side-eye because my one day a year is kind of small when compared to:
    1. Gma dying
    2.  60+ hour work weeks
    3.  New house and pending remodeling on current house

    SO...I have to take a moment, step back and say "if I want something, I have to ask for it".  Doesn't mean I won't have a mini tantrum inside though.  I reserve the right to do that once in awhile.
    AuntFlo
  • 6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker

    Good for you V!

    @ftrmrsO- it's ok to be a little hurt.  You recognize the other things are bigger, but you can still be hurt. 

    VarunaTTGBCKMNNEBridemrsconn23
  • Late, late, late today.  We went to my mom's today because we had an inspection and appraisal.  

    She signed us up to go to a JDRF kickoff luncheon since she's on the marketing committee and our family 'team captain'.   It was fun.  The food was great. 

    The kiddo is stressing about the move.  He's been under the weather for the past couple days.  I think things being 'official' is messing with him.  Changing schools, friends, etc. is tough.  Doable and not as bad as you make it out to be in your head, but still tough. Poor guy. 

    STFU parent:  PTing is going well.  DefConn earned a new truck for his progress yesterday.  :D We had to go back to diapers due to running around today, but we'll be back at it tomorrow.  

    I've got to get inspections ordered for the new house.  Like tomorrow. 
  • Yes, V. It was for the best, and you never know what other opportunity might become available now that you're free.
    image
    VarunaTT
  • O-face - I think it's reasonable for you to feel hurt. yeah, he has some big stuff going on, but you still need to know you're a priority to him. 

    V - i think your friend is right - who cares if this other woman thinks she "won" - as long as you're happy with your decision, it's a win for you. also - woohoo at no Diva. i think it's true that people rarely leave jobs, they leave managers. 

    for me:
    Dietbet/workout schedule is going well, and still sticking with it. have lost around 23-24lbs since Easter, and am feeling much better, overall. people are noticing too, which is nice. 

    i'm still enjoying my new job, even though i feel like I am herding cats, a lot of days. considerably less stressful than the last job. my new boss is awesome. He replaced one of our directors last year, and he's helping me with development opportunities. He has had some similar experiences with feeling held back in our company, so we've been working through that. He's also very flexible in terms of schedule, which is nice to have.

    Wolverine starts pre-K in a few weeks (she'll be 4 in Nov). She's such a smart, funny kid - it's always fun to see what she'll come up with next. She's getting good with the overnight potty training (she's been in underwear FT in the day since 2.5) and I've already told her this is her last box of pull-ups. She's been dry 11 of the last 12 nights.
  • @ftrMrs0 Running always gives that freedom feeling doesn't it?

    @VarunaTT Your friend is right, focus on your feelings and stay true and strong :)

    @*Barbie* Congrats on the weight loss! I have an aunt who's been trying to lose weight since I was 8 (been 20 years lol) and I understand all the hard work and commitment behind it!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    0Face*Barbie*
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