Vows?

labro

Married and engaged ladies...what did you use/what are you thinking of using for your marriage vows and ring exchange? We had our final pre-marital counseling session last night and our pastor asked us to email our vows to him so he could work on the ceremony. I honestly hadn't put a TON of thought into it. I don't think I really want to write personal vows...the pressure would be too much and I feel really nervous about not making them cheesy or something. I feel more comfortable with something our pastor would say and I'd repeat and something that is familiar/traditional.

I think I've found what I like for the marriage vows. It's pretty standard and traditional but I think it covers all of things that are important to us in our relationship.

I, LaHo, take you, FI, to be my lawfully wedded husband, my constant friend, my faithful partner, and my love from this day forward. In the presence of our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.

For the ring exchange I'm having a tough time finding something that I feel really good about. The vows above make me all emotional and giddy, and after that, all the ring exchange vows seem to be subpar.

Here's a couple that I think are ok:

I would say - This ring is a token of my love. I marry you with this ring, with all that I have and all that I am.
He responds with - I will forever wear this ring as a sign of my commitment and the desire of my heart.

And then we'd repeat it for my ring.

Or - This ring I give to you as a token of my love and devotion. I pledge to you all that I am and all that I will ever be as your wife. With this ring, I marry you and join my life to yours.

I don't know. I'm looking for other ideas. It seems like a lot of the ones I'm finding online are kind of cheesy or all "This ring is gold, blah blah blah, corny corny corny".

Ollie08

I have zero advice, but I wanted to tell you I got the chills when reading that! So that counts for something, right?

buddysmom80

Hahaha I was just thinking about vows today! I was like "hey, let's write our own vows, how fun would that be???" That was in December, now I'm like "wtf was I thinking?" I think we're just writing our own vows and our JOP can do everything he does off his script.

For the rings, I like the second one better than the first.

I love your vows, I'm going to steal them (just kidding!)

labro

@Ollie08 The marriage vows give me chills too!! I really love them! They feel right to me.

@buddysmom80 Steal away! I like the second one more as well...but FI wasn't feeling it so I'm trying to come up with other options.

eilis1228

I got chills too! I really love it. I have no idea which version of vows we'll do, but I really really really love "with this ring, I thee wed" for the ring exchange. I may even engrave "I thee wed" on his ring. I think of the two choices you posted for the ring exchange, the second one is my favorite. They're both great though.

loves2shop4shoes

Our vows were pretty traditional, with a few edits.  They were:

I, DH take you, Shoes,
to be my wife and my best friend.
In the presence of God and our family and friends,
I vow to be your faithful and supportive husband
from this day forward,
for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer,
in sickness and in health.
I offer my affection, courage, and strength.
I promise to love you unconditionally, to honor and respect you,
to laugh and cry with you, and to cherish you all the days of my life.

ETA:  My "ring" vows were:

I give you this ring as a sign of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have.  I honor you in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

buddysmom80

@lapeanut1018 if I can't come up with anything I"m taking yours.

 

GoldenPenguin

I originally wanted to write our own vows, but FI wanted nothing to do with it, so we're going to try to find something. I don't want anything super traditional though. I've looked a little bit, but nothing too major yet. 

labro

@loves2shop4shoes I think the thing I'm struggling with is all the ring vows I like are religious (like yours). And we're not. And I can't seem to reword them in a way that leaves God out of the picture. It'd be extremely hypocritical of us to just include it for the sake of including it because we aren't believers even though we were both raised Christian.

phira

We're writing our own vows, and we've agreed to write actual vows. I don't ever mind when I go to weddings and the self-written vows are just declarations of how much each person loves the other. My issue is that I find any sort of repeat-after-me vows extremely grating.

We're doing a semi-Jewish wedding, so when we do the ring exchange, we're saying the traditional Hebrew, which translates to, "I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine."

loves2shop4shoes

LaPeanut1018 said:

@loves2shop4shoes I think the thing I'm struggling with is all the ring vows I like are religious (like yours). And we're not. And I can't seem to reword them in a way that leaves God out of the picture. It'd be extremely hypocritical of us to just include it for the sake of including it because we aren't believers even though we were both raised Christian.

Well what if you were to say, "FI, I give you this ring as a sign of my vow, and with all that I am and all that I have.  Whenever you look upon your hand, be reminded of my love for you."

[Deleted User]

@LaPeanut1018 Look at this thread:

http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/234331/exchange-of-rings-wording-modern

loves2shop4shoes

phira said:

We're writing our own vows, and we've agreed to write actual vows. I don't ever mind when I go to weddings and the self-written vows are just declarations of how much each person loves the other. My issue is that I find any sort of repeat-after-me vows extremely grating.

We're doing a semi-Jewish wedding, so when we do the ring exchange, we're saying the traditional Hebrew, which translates to, "I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine."

OMG.  SO.MUCH.THIS.

I get soooooo annoyed when I go to a wedding and their "vows" are nothing more than love letters.  It's like...it's called a vow for a reason.  It's supposed to be a promise to do something.  And while I'm sure Stevie's eyes are bluer than the sea and make your legs quiver, you have not promised anything.  Saying, "I promise to love you for the rest of my life and not get angry when you fart, no matter how offensive it may be" is a vow.

See the difference?

cu97tiger

GoldenPenguin said:

I originally wanted to write our own vows, but FI wanted nothing to do with it, so we're going to try to find something. I don't want anything super traditional though. I've looked a little bit, but nothing too major yet. 

This.

Here's ours. They are pretty traditional:
Tiger's DH, do you come here today in the presence of God, your family and friends, with love in your heart and the desire to be united in marriage with Tiger? 

Do you promise to share the burdens and the blessings of your life together and to give Tiger the encouragement she needs to become the woman she is destined to be? [Tiger's DH] I do. 

Tiger, do you come here today in the presence of God, your family and friends, with love in your heart and the desire to be united in marriage with Tiger's DH? 

Do you promise to share the burdens and the blessings of your life together and to give Tiger's DH the encouragement he needs to become the man he is destined to be? I do.

[Tiger's DH] I, Tiger's DH, take you Tiger to be my beloved wife. To have and to hold, to love and to cherish, to honor and to comfort, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, for as long as we both shall live. 

[Tiger] I, Tiger, take you Tiger's DH as my beloved husband. To have and to hold, to love and to cherish, to honor and to comfort, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, for as long as we both shall live.

KeptInStitches

We're going to use traditional vows - we haven't met with our pastor yet (sometime in the next 2-3 months, I think) to start premarital counseling, so once we start that, we'll also ask to see her wedding setting. It's an ELCA church, but every Sunday they use the "Now the Feast and Celebration" setting, which isn't one I grew up with. If that's her wedding setting, I'd like to see what she recommends and we'll go from there.

phira

loves2shop4shoes said:

phira said:

We're writing our own vows, and we've agreed to write actual vows. I don't ever mind when I go to weddings and the self-written vows are just declarations of how much each person loves the other. My issue is that I find any sort of repeat-after-me vows extremely grating.

We're doing a semi-Jewish wedding, so when we do the ring exchange, we're saying the traditional Hebrew, which translates to, "I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine."

OMG.  SO.MUCH.THIS.

I get soooooo annoyed when I go to a wedding and their "vows" are nothing more than love letters.  It's like...it's called a vow for a reason.  It's supposed to be a promise to do something.  And while I'm sure Stevie's eyes are bluer than the sea and make your legs quiver, you have not promised anything.  Saying, "I promise to love you for the rest of my life and not get angry when you fart, no matter how offensive it may be" is a vow.

See the difference?

Exactly!

Peaseblossom55

We had the traditional Catholic wedding vows, it was nice to not have to think about writing our own vows.

However our priest as part of the homily had us write love letters to each other, and we weren't allowed to see what each other wrote.  We gave them to our priest at our rehearsal and he read them outloud for the first time during the ceremony.  It was sweet. I laughed, and I cried.  It was perfect.  I opened my letter with stating I loved him because he does like guacamole and I never have to worry about him stealing my guac, ya know the important stuff.

We said on our wedding anniversary we should make it a tradition of reading our letters to each other.

Swazzle

Wedding vows: 

I, Swazzle, take you, Mr. Swazzle, to be my husband;

to be my partner in marriage and in life; 

to love and honor you;

to be honest and faithful to you;

to stand by you and care for you

all the days of my life. 

Ring vows: 

Mr. Swazzle, I give you this ring

as a symbol of my love 

and my choice to share

my life and dreams with you.

I give you this ring, 

with the pledge to love you

today, tomorrow, and always.

ShallowSeas

We are writing our own vows.  I have mine done, idk if FI has his done or if he's even started on them.  Aside from that, our officiant as everything else planned out and I liked them. This what he had written in the scrip he emailed us:

Before God and these witnesses, will you, B, take Sev to be your wife?  Do you promise to love and comfort her, honor and keep her, and in joy and sorrow, preserve with her this bond, unbroken as long as you both shall live?  If so, answer: I do. And yada yada same thing for me.

B, will you take this ring and place it on Sev’s finger, and as you do, repeat after me:

I give you this ring as a token of my love and commitment to live with you in marriage, fulfilling my vows, from this day forward. 

 

Sev, will you take this ring and place it on B’s finger, and as you do, repeat after me:

I give you this ring as a token of my love and commitment to live with you in marriage, fulfilling my vows, from this day forward

 

Pepperally

This is what I came up with, FI has yet to read them, but now I'm starting to think they are a little too "fluffy" or cheesy, but I really wanted something different than the standard which is what our officiant will use unless we decide otherwise:

D, do you take J to be your lawfully wedded wife,
Do you promise to give J the best of yourself
and to ask of her no more than you can give,

to promise to respect J as her own person
and to realize that her interests, desires and needs are no less important than your own,

to promise to be open with J, to be willing to face changes and grow together,

and to love J in good times and in bad, completely and forever?

J, do you take D to be your lawfully wedded husband,

Do you promise to give D the best of yourself
and to ask of him no more than you can give,

to promise to respect D as his own person
and to realize that his interests, desires and needs are no less important than your own,

to promise to be open with D, to be willing to face changes and grow together,

and to love D in good times and in bad, completely and forever?

 

phira

@Pepperally Honestly, I think most wedding vows (either the love letter stuff or actual vows) are pretty fluffy. Yours don't strike me as particularly overly fluffy at all. And when you're actually saying your vows, people are going to just be all OMGGGGG WEDDING. Like, at my cousin's wedding, I spent the entire ceremony trying to wipe up all the tears that were shooting out of my face.

[Deleted User]

I'm not engaged or married, but I'd love to suggest the following:

I vow to never give you up,
never gonna let you down,
never gonna run around and desert you.

I vow to never make make you cry,
vow to never say goodbye,
never gonna tell a lie or hurt you.

GoldenPenguin

@EisleyJoGo - You win the internet today, my friend. 

Also, if anyone ever succeeds in Rick Rolling in their vows, you will personally be my hero forever & ever.

Swazzle

EisleyJoGo said:

I'm not engaged or married, but I'd love to suggest the following:

I vow to never give you up,
never gonna let you down,
never gonna run around and desert you.

I vow to never make make you cry,
vow to never say goodbye,
never gonna tell a lie or hurt you.

Me while reading this: 

[Deleted User]

GoldenPenguin said:

@EisleyJoGo - You win the internet today, my friend. 

Also, if anyone ever succeeds in Rick Rolling in their vows, you will personally be my hero forever & ever.

@GoldenPenguin - Challenge ACCEPTED

doubleSS07

Our were fairly traditional, but not overly religious since we aren't either.  We toyed with doing some of our own but H was really shy about that so we chose to just repeat.  Here was ours:

H, will you have this woman, whose hand you now hold before God and these witnesses to be your wedded wife, to live together in the estate of holy matrimony?  Will you love her, comfort her, honor her and keep her in sickness and in health, in prosperity and in adversity and forsaking all others, keep her only unto you so long as you both shall live?

(Answer “I will”)

S, will you have this man, whose hand you now hold before God and these witnesses to be your wedded husband, to live together in the estate of holy matrimony?  Will you love him, comfort him, honor him and keep him in sickness and in health, in prosperity and in adversity and forsaking all others, keep him only unto you so long as you both shall live?

(Answer “I will”)

Please repeat after me:

I H, take you, S, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, in joy and sorrow, to love and to cherish and to be faithful to you as long as we both shall live.

I S, take you, H, to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, in joy and sorrow, to love and to cherish and to be faithful to you as long as we both shall live.

 Rings

From the earliest times, the ring has been a symbol of wedded love.  Being one, unbroken circle, it symbolizes the unending love you promise today.  You have selected these rings to be a token of your marriage covenant. 

H, please place and hold the ring on S's finger and repeat after me:

“This ring I thee give, in token and pledge of my constant faith and abiding love.  With this ring I thee wed”.

S, please place and hold the ring on H's finger and repeat after me:

“This ring I thee give, in token and pledge of my constant faith and abiding love.  With this ring I thee wed”.

GoldenPenguin

I just found our vows, but I'm not posting because I don't want anyone else to use them first. I'm selfish.

labro

@Swazzle and @doubleSS07 I love your ring vows!!!!! They're making me all teary.

jenna8984

We are having our friend/ old roommate marry us since we aren't religious and why pay a JOP hundreds of dollars. So I have to come up with her entire script. I think I'm going to use this one

http://www.greatofficiants.com/design-your-ceremony/57

But some of you guys have awesome wording so maybe I'll tweak it here & there! I wanted to write vows but FI was scared to death of it.

lavenderfields13

@LaPeanut1018 I have nothing valuable to add but I just wanted to say I teared up a little reading those vows. I'm a big baby and I cry at pretty much every wedding. 

LabLove86

I loved the vows from a friends wedding so she emailed them to me forever ago - I kept them just in case ) She just said she found them on the internet. 

I, GROOM take you BRIDE to be my wife, my partner in life and my one true love.

I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow, and forever.

I will trust you and honor you

I will laugh with you and cry with you.

I will love you faithfully

Through the best and the worst,

Through the difficult and the easy.

Whatever may come I will always be there.

As I have given you my hand to hold

So I give you my life to keep