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Your thoughts on this dress shopping business....

BreMRBreMR member
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edited August 2014 in Not Engaged Yet
So as I mentioned earlier I found my dream dress in my budget and it's local.. I found a shop that carries it in store, but they only have it in a size 8... I wear a size 8 currently (in pants at least, I have no idea what my dress size is.. I buy dresses from Old Navy).

 From my research on the trusty google it says that if you wear a size 8 in pants your dress size will most likely be a 12... I asked the bridal shop gal if this would be a big mistake for my ego to try on an 8 when dresses run so small she insisted it would be fine because it's a ball gown and they just clip it to your bra. She also said that because they do only have it in a small size it will most likely be sold off the rack sooner than most dresses would because it won't be as popular for women to try on so she doesn't recommend I wait until I lose weight.

 What is your experience? When you tried on dresses were any of them smaller sizes? Should I do it? This may be a slight post & run on account of my crazy new job that I have no time to internet... but I promise I will respond when I can!
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Re: Your thoughts on this dress shopping business....

  • Well, I was also planning on waiting, but I haven't really had a dream dress in mind.  If I did and I found it locally I would definitely jump on it.  It's only trying it on, it could still totally go either way.  Stores can only stock so many samples, so it seems very fortunate that you were able to find a specific one you had in mind!! 

    Just don't get talked into buying the too-small sample ;-)

    I actually finally saw ONE in a magazine I might be interested in, and I've thought about trying to locate it while I'm here in Chicago because I figure I might have better luck in a big city.  However, I'm nervous to make an appt since I probably wouldn't buy it here and they are likely to find that out, and if I did love it, I think my mom would feel even more left out than she already does and give me more grief!

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  • Ohh I certainly wouldn't buy the too small sample... if there is anything I know about myself is that as much as I like to convince myself I'll lose weight I have to admit there is a chance I won't :) I definitely couldn't go shopping without my mom, she would kill me for sure!!
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  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
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    I haven't gone wedding dress shopping but if you think this dress could be the one then don't wait to lose weight to go look at it. I've been struggling with weight loss for a long time and even though I'm determined that I will eventually lose the weight I've also learned I can't put life on hold because of it.

    Your weight is just a number. The right dress will make you feel beautiful no matter what size you are.


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  • phiraphira Bahstin member
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    I'd go for it. I'm a size 12 or 14 depending on what I've been eating and how much I've been going to the gym. I tried on some size 12s, 14s, and 10s. It's not that demoralizing when the sample doesn't fit; the idea is to make sure it's the right dress for you.
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  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
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    @Phira - I love your siggy pic! You are gorgeous!


  • Thanks ladies!! @phira I think this is the first time I've seen you, you're LOVELY!
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  • Also, I dug my prom dress out of my closet, and it was a size 6 and I got it on and over my problem areas, it doesn't zip by a long shot but it doesn't look pathetic either. So I think I'll do it!!
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  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
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    I hope you love it!


  • phiraphira Bahstin member
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    @BreMR @bethsmiles Awwwwwwwwwwwwww I'm blushing.
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  • blabla89blabla89 Atlanta member
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    Yeah, wedding dress sizing runs small. I tried on so many dresses in whatever size the store had that I couldn't keep track. Just try on the dresses you like and don't worry about what the size says.

    If you're close to fitting into the sample and can get a discount by buying it, ask how much seam allowance it has and whether it could be altered to your size. Does the store have a seamstress in house?

    Hope you LOVE it!

    @Phira you and J are adorable - love the picture!
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  • Blackbird230Blackbird230 Connecticut member
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    @phira, I LOVE your siggy.

    I haven't gone dress shopping yet, but I know when I do, I'm not really planning on losing weight so if I feel beautiful in the dress the way I am, then it's the one.

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  • I think almost every dress I tried on was too small or too big. The dress that I ended up buying was a tiny sample size! As long as you get over the dress not closing, it's really not a big deal. I expected it, and it didn't phase me. As for how it looks compared to how it will look when properly fitted, I think a-lines and ballgowns are much easier to judge than, say, mermaids, when the sample is too small and hanging off your back... the consultant will clip it, and if necessary pull it tighter for you while you gaze adoringly at yourself in the mirror ;)
    BreMR
  • The sample size that was ordered for me was a size 6 since my dress size is a size 4 and it fit perfectly but the catch was that since it was a sample, it had been tried on by many other girls so it was a bit stretched. So when I ordered my wedding dress in a size 6...it took all that the consultant had to zip that thing up to fit my broad back. So Ultimately I should have ordered a size 8 because I ended up having to take it out so it would fit my rib cage lol.

    I would just be careful with ordering a new dress based on a sample size but if you're buying the sample size then by all means GO FOR IT!
  • Dignity100Dignity100 Northeastern Ohio member
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    I'm a street size 16 at the moment (in old navy I'm a 14).  I tried on dresses ranging from size 10 - 26.  The 10's were ballgowns and I was shocked I could squeeze my way into them.  I actually contemplated getting a dress that was a size 12 that they could put a corset back in (it was a sample so it was stretched out a bit).

    When I purchased my dress, they actually found another ballgown by the same designer in the size the designer recommended and put me in that to get a better idea if it was the right size (I was between 2 sizes so they wanted to feel more confident I was ordering the right size).

    So if you're just trying on the size 8 - you'll be fine.  If you're trying on the size 8 in order to purchase THAT dress (and not order), it might be a little iffy.


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  • I'm a street size 4-8 (depends on the brand and the style... anything tight in the hips I'm an 8, flowy, more like a 4). I ordered my dress in a size 10 because that's what my hips translated to in that style.

    My suggestion is to get your measuring tape, measure your bust, waist and hips, and then look up the sizing chart for that designer. I wouldn't discourage you from goign to try on the size 8, as long as you understand that wedding dresses run small, so if you don't fit in it, it is in NO WAY a reflection on you or your body.

    Also, give us a pic of the dress!
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  • Thanks for the great insight ladies!! I am waiting to hear back from the store about a Saturday appt so I'll keep you posted and I will definitely share pics!
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  • I bought a sample gown and it was a little snug, couldn't button all of the buttons that go up the back. I figured I'd need to lose about 10 lbs to make it work, so I was fine with it. It was a 14 and I'm a 14 in street size pants. I've lost 5 lbs so far and it almost buttons the whole way up now but still needs some room, so 5 more lbs should do it, and ten lbs total I think is a realistic goal to meet. If I had to lose more than that, I may have reconsidered...I know myself far too well.
  • I wear a size 10-12 normally.  My wedding dress was a size 16.
  • phiraphira Bahstin member
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    Yeah, I think it's important to remember that most of us aren't one particular size everywhere. I can sometimes wear a 10 if it's loose around the hips and sleeveless.
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  • kaitlynmichellekaitlynmichelle British Columbia member
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    I range in sizes. When I bought my dress I was usually wearing street size 14 and sometimes 16. My dress is a 14. Now I'm in street sizes 12 to 14 and my dress is still a bit snug on my hips.

    I found it varied per dress too. Some 14s were too small, some 16s fell off me.
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  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches the Northern Plains member
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    My large size is my bust, and in that I'm usually a 10-12 street size. I bought a 12 dress based on the sample, but it had hardly been tried on (was new to the shop). I'll take my chances.
  • My biggest problem area is my waist and hips, but I guess with a ball gown it may be more hidden. I showed my mom both dresses and she said "Don't you think it's a bit much for a beach wedding?"  

    Womp Womp :(  I was so sad...and I think she could tell what she said upset me... she ended up texting me an hour after she left my house to apologize for being an asshole and that the dress will be perfect. It was my first wedding related bummer, but I did appreciate her apologizing... even if she only did it to make me feel better :)
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  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
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    Those are both gorgeous! I'm sorry your mom wasn't as excited about the dress as you are but seeing it on the model is totally different from seeing it on you. She could change her mind once she sees the dress in person and on you instead of a picture of it on a model.


  • kaitlynmichellekaitlynmichelle British Columbia member
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    I think my dress is a bit much for a mountain wedding. But I loved it and that is what I think is most important.

    Both of those dresses are gorgeous!
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    BreMR
  • I think my dress is a bit much for a mountain wedding. But I loved it and that is what I think is most important. Both of those dresses are gorgeous!
    Thank you!  When I decided on a destination wedding I knew there were certain things I was going to have to give up (cake tasting for one! ahhh!) but I definitely didn't want to give up my dream dress.  Plus, I am most likely NOT getting married in the sand.. it's probably at a gazebo that has a regular walkway...I feel 100% okay with my decision.  I've seen pictures of weddings at this resort and I've seen women in silk dresses, which seems like it would be kind of hot.. so I know i'm not crazy.
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  • @breMR - I'm sorry your mom kind of poo pooed your dresses but I'm glad that she came back and apologized.  I love both of those and I've seen everything from a typical flow-y style dress on the beach to a satin mermaid with the rouching and the whole 9 yards. 


    I'm glad you are going to try it, I think you'll be surprised by the fit, especially since it's a ballgown.  Much more forgiving!  I am a street size 10 and my dress was ordered in a 14 for hips and boobs.  The one thing I will suggest is to keep an open mind when you go in.  I know you are in love with this look, and I had one too, but you might be surprised once you get in the actual dresses how you feel.  Just be open to playing a little dress up and trying all kinds of styles!



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  • Parents and third parties can DEF bum you out. My mom and my neighbor both said that they prefer "simpler" dresses to mine (which I considered pretty simple!), though my mom then said that she thinks my dress really suits my personality. She also said that she maybe loved the $2000 dress more, since it fit her simpler style, but the other dress (the one I bought) was almost as nice and only $700 so I should do that.  And my dad said "are you sure you like it?" and "I'm sure it will be perfect when you lose 10 pounds." 

    They don't mean to stick their foot in their mouths, but it happens. I let it upset me and worry me that I picked "the wrong dress"  at first, and then I realized that the dress was pretty, I was happy with the price, it seemed to suit me... and picking the wrong dress is not like picking the wrong guy! And even more than guys, there are probably a ton of dresses that are "right." 

    Anyway, my point is to not let your mom's opinion get you down. I think tulle is flowy and can work on the beach, even as a ball gown. And the dress is COMPLETELY about you and you feeling great. If that means ball gown, then it doesn't matter where you get married. You get to be extra fancy. 
    BreMR
  • eilis1228eilis1228 Southwest member
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    Aw, I'm sorry your mom wasn't as excited about the dream dress. I know that we're supposed to be our toughest critics, but sometimes our mom can fulfill that role really dang well. :-\ I'm glad she apologized though, and like @doubleSS07 said, she'll probably change her tune once she sees you in the dresses. And don't worry about what will be "appropriate" for a beach wedding. Wear whatever you want! It's your wedding! It's your day to feel like a princess. :)


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  • Dignity100Dignity100 Northeastern Ohio member
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    @BreMR - Don't worry about what your mother says.  I am have a DW and I have a HUGE ballgown.  My mom did not like any dress I tried on because 'I'm not the same weight I was when I was 21'.  Plus she wanted me to be more covered because 'I was raised to be modest/conservative'.  My mom did NOT go dress shopping with me, I sent her pictures to get her reaction.  The dress I ended up with made me happy, I didn't care about anybody else's opinion.


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