Bridesmaid with boyfriend..

cheergirljmd

I have a little bit of a dilemma... One of my bridesmaids has a boyfriend that is not in the Bridal Party and does not know ANY of the guests. I don't know where to seat him to make him feel comfortable. But, I also don't want to split up my Bridal party. Does anyone have any suggestions or have been in this situation?

manateehugger

cheergirljmd said:

I have a little bit of a dilemma... One of my bridesmaids has a boyfriend that is not in the Bridal Party and does not know ANY of the guests. I don't know where to seat him to make him feel comfortable. But, I also don't want to split up my Bridal party. Does anyone have any suggestions or have been in this situation?

This is why you need to make sure all dates and significant others are seated with your bridal party. They're there to help you celebrate their relationship - respect theirs and let them sit next to each other. Your bridal party would rather be sitting elsewhere and their dates and SOs feel awkward at the "dates table." No one cares about head table pictures anyway.

You've got a few options:

1. Have a sweetheart table with just you and your new spouse

2. Have a long head table that can squeeze everyone in

3. Have a king's table with people seated on both sides

Either way, SO's and dates must be sat next to their partners. 

southernbelle0915

Dates should be seated with their SOs (even in the BP), so this shouldn't be a problem. 

We had a 2.5ft round for our sweetheart table. On each side of the sweet heart table were 8ft banquet tables. His GMs sat at one with their wives/SOs. And my BMs sat the other with their husbands/SOs. We each had 4 attendants. They sat on both sides of the banquet tables, kings table style. 

climbingsingle

Have a sweetheart table and let your BP sit with their dates/SOs. 

jneen101

Is none of your bridal party sitting with their dates?  Because if so, that sucks.

DanikaMarie0227

PDKH said:

cheergirljmd said:

I have a little bit of a dilemma... One of my bridesmaids has a boyfriend that is not in the Bridal Party and does not know ANY of the guests. I don't know where to seat him to make him feel comfortable. But, I also don't want to split up my Bridal party. Does anyone have any suggestions or have been in this situation?

This is why you need to make sure all dates and significant others are seated with your bridal party. They're there to help you celebrate their relationship - respect theirs and let them sit next to each other. Your bridal party would rather be sitting elsewhere and their dates and SOs feel awkward at the "dates table." No one cares about head table pictures anyway.

You've got a few options:

1. Have a sweetheart table with just you and your new spouse

2. Have a long head table that can squeeze everyone in

3. Have a king's table with people seated on both sides

Either way, SO's and dates must be sat next to their partners. 

This. I was in a wedding this past year & FI didn't know a single person there. I had to sit at the head table while he sat with a group of strangers. Luckily, everybody at that table happened to be awesome & somebody from that table didn't show up (another BMs boyfriend) so as soon as they did toasts and announced it was time for dinner, I moved to that table with FI. But overall, it's so much more considerate to keep couples together.

hales2010

Coming from a girl who was put in the situation please take my advice. Either fit their SO/Wives with them at the wedding party table or just have a sweetheart table for you and you husband. She will more than likely want to sit with him anyways and leave the bridal party table. My FI was in a wedding where the bride has them sit like this. I literally did not know anyone cexcept the groom and his family which were all the wedding party. I was literally sat at a table pretty much by myself. My FI ended up leaving the wedding party table to come sit with me once he realized this. That is why at my wedding we are having a wedding party table but I have made sure that the table has enough seats for my wedding party plus their dates if they have one.

vmj23

You should have any dates sitting with the bridal party. I did a sweetheart table and put the bridal party with their significant other throughout the tables where they'd be most comfortable. I've been in weddings where the bridal party was at a table all together, but still with their dates. I've never seen where a date is split up.

lc07

Agree with the PPs. Do NOT split up your wedding party from their dates.

princessleia22

Find a way to seat all wedding party with their SO's.

 

I'm attending a wedding next weekend as BM with a head table with just bridal party, no SO's.  My husband will be sitting next to my parents, but they are the only people he knows there. I do plan to go join him as soon as possible. I feel horrible that I'm dragging his across country to come to this wedding with me, then I'll be ditching him for a good portion of the weekend.  Day before wedding, Bride wants to do rehearsal, BM lunch, mani-pedi's, so he'll be on his own for a lot of that day (although I may bring him along to rehearsal, skip BM lunch, then he's just on his own while we do nails).  Then wedding day we have hair/makeup in morning (6 hours before wedding?), then help bride get ready, then ceremony (he'll be sitting next to my parents again since I'm in wedding party), then 3 hours (!) for wedding party photos off site (we got hotel room at wedding venue so he has place to crash during this time), then not sitting next to each other at reception.

For those that like head tables without SO's, they always say "you can live without them for a few hours". Yes, I can.  But I feel bad that I'm making DH take a couple days off work and travel cross country, to abandon him for the 2 days we are there and leave him on his own while I run around to accommodate the brides schedule of activities. Between rehearsal, hair/makeup, nails, BM lunches, ceremony, and reception, that's more than just a few hours apart.  And I'm leaving DH alone in a strange town where he doesn't know any people or where anything is, so I feel bad about abandoning him. He's dreading the weekend. We almost had me go alone to the wedding, but DH hasn't met most of my extended family, so this seemed like a good opportunity for him to meet several of them.

schellzinator

I'm a proponent of what PPs have said - sit the bridal party with their significant others.  I've said this on other threads - but once the ceremony ends - the bridal party has completed their duty of dressing the part and standing next to you. Let them enjoy your wedding with their SO.

novella1186

Everything has pretty much already been said, but just to chime in, I was in a wedding where my boyfriend had to go sit at a separate table and he didn't know anyone. I could see him across the room and he looked bored and miserable the entire time, therefore I didn't have a very good time either. If everyone is there to celebrate your relationship (which they are) don't step on their relationships by not even letting them sit together. Please let your BM sit with her boyfriend! It will be a much better evening for everyone that way.

wandajune6

ClimbingBrideNY said:

Have a sweetheart table and let your BP sit with their dates/SOs. 

This is what we're doing. It also helps with people in the WP who have kids.

MyNameIsNot

All of your WP should be seated with their dates.  It doesn't matter whether the date is in the WP or how many people the date knows.

Separating a couple is incredibly rude.  

mocarski002

As PP's have said seat your wedding party with your dates. We are doing a sweethart table then split up the wedding pary to sit with their dates and who's friends with who. For example, my sister is my MOH, she has 2 kids and her husband and I also invited her MIL. I am having them all sit together. I'll probably throw a few more people at there table just gotta figure that out.

Bubblegum5586

I don't get why head tables are so important to people when they usually end up being such a hassle! Just have a sweetheart table!

bridesmaidlongisland

Personally , I think he should be sat with her. I am in the same position for my family member's wedding. My SO knows only a few people and I am a Bridesmaid.