Giving Away Dilemma

emalex91

Okay so I'm really having a hard time deciding what to do. When I was in first grade my dad left my mom, sister and I for someone else. When he left, he really wasn't a "dad". He would go out of town randomly wit friends for weeks at a time, promise to come get us and never show up. During this time, my mother's dad stepped in and became a father figure to us, doing everything with us that our dad should have done. My father and I are still extremely close, even though for about the past eight years or so my dad has been in my life again, just not fully. I dont know whether or not to have them both walk me down the aisle or to just suck it up and let my dad walk me down. If I did that, would it be weird to dedicate a dance with my grandfather? Help me!

CMGragain

Walking you down the aisle is not "giving the bride away".  That is a different part of the ceremony, and it is often omitted these days.  The person who "escorts" you down the aisle is simply offering you his/her arm for support.  Anyone can escort you, and I vote for your grandfather.
When I was a bride, my father had died.  I asked my uncle to escort me.  When the time came in the ceremony (1976) "Who gives this woman?"  he responded, "Her mother does."  An alternative would have been, "Her family does."
As for dances, you may have them both, but please keep them short.

southernbelle0915

There are few things going on here. 

1) Walking you down the aisle =/= the "give away". You can walk with whoever you want or by yourself. From what you say here, I would probably just walk with your grandfather.

2) You don't need to do the give away at all. My mom and dad walked me up the aisle, we hugged/kissed, then they sat down. There was no "who gives this woman..." business.

3) You can do spotlight dances with whoever you want or you can skip it all together. Even if your FI does a mother/son dance, you don't need to do one yourself. From what you say here, if you decide to do one, I would probably just do a dance with your grandfather.

Cookie Pusher

Have whoever you want walk you down the aisle or you can walk unescorted. There was a time when I had a bio-father, step-father, and bio-grandfathers who could have walked me down the aisle, but I had always pictured my mother doing it. Even though situations had changed by the time I got married, I still walked down the aisle with my mother by my side because that's what I wanted.