Engagement ring diamond switch

mrsamandalynn

So this is going to be contraversial, I just have the feeling. I've been engaged 8mo now, not a single arrangement has been made cause we've been saving up. I recently gained an awesome new job and our financial situation is better than I could've imagined. That being said, I think I'd like to swap out my center stone in my engagement ring for something a little bigger and more fitting of our situation. My fiancé is military, and I'm in school still, so finances were a little tight when we first got engaged (he bought the ring a year prior). Is this silly to even think about?

lilacck28

Have you talked about it with your fiance? If he's fine with it, and you are sure you want to spend the money on a larger center stone instead of keeping it for a house down payment, student loans, for some of the wedding, or as a financial cushion in case your situation changes again... then go for it. But don't forget that you can always change out that center stone down the road.  

JennyColada

I dunno, I mean, you can do what you want, it's your ring. But personally, I think I'd be quite happy with my ring. Sure, it might not "reflect your current financial situation", but it's still your ring, and that is lovely. I see upgrading a ring to be similar as a vow renewal (as in, it might get a little side-eye from me if you do it so soon, but in the big scheme of life my opinion doesn't really matter).

caitlinmca

Id rather save the money and save it for something more useful as PP said. The wedding I would rather make sure my guests are hosted first and foremost before changing my stone out, a house, bills/loans, saving the money just in general and as the other PP said saving it for a vow renewal to "upgrade".

I have a lifetime warranty with my jewelry store that if I want a bigger ring I can take my current ring in and the price I paid would be put towards a bigger more grand ring down the road but I doubt I ever will. I like my ring and my original ring is special to me. A diamond is a diamond, only you will ever be the one to ever look at it up close and personal 24/7 unless people as to see it.

NYCMercedes

If it's ok with your FI, go for it. My H was sentimental about my ering until he saw how nice the new ring would look. We just added two big side stones for the three stone ring. More bling, the better.

ohmrs2014

I do think you need to ask your FI what he thinks and what he wants to do.  If he is ok with it, then I say go it.

As a wedding gift, my DH upgraded the setting of my stone.  I originally had a solitaire and when we sized the wedding band, I had chosen an insert, the prongs on the solitaire were interfering with the way it sat in the insert.  As a surprise, he took me to the jeweler to pick out a new setting and I chose a halo.  He has even mentioned upgrading the stone on our 5 or 10 year anniversary, this I'm not too sure about, but we obviously have time LOL.

climbingsingle

Personally I'd rather put that money towards the wedding. Or even a really nice wedding ring. I wouldn't change my engagement ring.

slothiegal

Seems silly to me, but it's your and your FI's money--if you're both on the same page, go for it. Personally, DH and I decided early on what our financial priorities were (i.e. our wedding and future home was/is more important to us than some jewelry) and managed our money with those plans in mind.

GoldenPenguin

scribe95 said:

I wouldn't do it. You have a wedding to pay for. Why add to a perfectly fine ring? It sounds like you consider the ring to be a status symbol and that rubs me the wrong way.

This. I don't know what "more fitting for our situation" means. You're suddenly making more money, so you need to show it off with a bigger ring? 

Since you're saving for the wedding, perhaps you can start adding more to that fund instead of trying to use your ring as a status symbol.

jacques27

Do what you want, but why the rush to do it?  Who are you trying to show off for?

You don't say what the job is, but it's something you only recently received.  You were recently or are still in school.  You also say your fiance is military.  So this tells me a few things that all potentially point to wait.

1.  Is your school completely paid for or do you have loans?  If you have loans, put your money towards that, not a ring.  You have a lifetime to upgrade, but if you default on government loans, that will seriously haunt you and your ability to get other jobs in the future for a long time, depending on your line of work (you will absolutely get passed over if you are trying to work in anything where you have access to money or to personal information of others).
2.  Does your job have a probationary period?  Have you passed it?  Is your company and/or industry stable or since you're new and have little seniority could you get the axe if layoffs occur?
3.  Since your fiance is military, does your job have national offices where you could transfer or do they allow telecommuting?  Because you are at the whim of the government and could be stationed somewhere else and have to move with minimal notice.  I know of several military wives who have had a hard time maintaining careers due to frequent moves to follow their husbands.  So your job stability and increased income could come crashing to a halt.

If you don't have at least six months worth of full living expenses saved up in case of emergency (above and beyond anything you've saved for the wedding), then I wouldn't even think of putting that money towards upgrading your ring.  Upgrading your ring at this stage in your life (based on the minimal information you've provided at least) seems like a very short-sighted move.