Loud chewers...

[Deleted User]

I am slowly dying here in my cubicle. My manager is the LOUDEST chewer ever, especially with having chips every day with lunch.  He HAS to be chewing with his mouth wide open like a horse for him to be that loud.  I don't know how his wife hasn't ever said anything to him about it.

We need to have an intervention or something! He's the most sarcastic person I've ever met, so we're all debating on how he'd take it if he made a joke out of it at our next happy hour or something... I have to put headphones on to drown it out... 

He also will occasionally clip his fingernails... And start drumming loudly on his desk which makes mine start shaking... I could go on and on...  Could talk forever about my teammate who chooses to use work time to loudly argue with his cable company (or Sears, or whoever the chosen person is for that day) about his bill or service, etc for like 45 minutes straight.  This coworker also leaves his ringer/text tone turned up all day, and uses his headset to talk on the phone in the bathroom.  Ah the joys of the corporate world!

I love most of the people I work with, but some are just completely intolerable!! Anyone else have good work stories?

futuremrsr2015

I second the loud chewer.  Personal pet peeve it actually wrecks my appetite and I avoid eating near the people whenever possible.  We had someone over once who wouldn't chew with his mouth closed my mom promptly told him to chew with it closed or you won't be eating here anymore.

[Deleted User]

Love that she called him out!

Another pet peeve, the same coworker as mentioned above COMES INTO MY CUBE and stands behind me to talk over the cube wall to my manager... He apologizes for "invading my space" but at the same time has his hand on the back of my chair, leaning on it! Just walk around the other row and have your damn conversation!

gladyscf

Our receptionist chews with her mouth open ALL. THE. TIME!!!

She isn't even that close to me in proximity and I have Pandora playing on my computer in the background and can hear her over that. Plus she chews really fast. I don't even know how she does it.

My boss has a large mouth and INHALES his food. I want to ask if he even tastes it. He just shovels it in. At least he chews with his mouth closed. It's like he's gulping his food. 

I'm starting to despise office lunches.

bekt14

My finace is the loudest chewer ever. He literally cannot chew with his mouth closed. Last night at dinner I challenged him to keep his mouth closed for as long as possible, and he couldn't manage a single bite. He honestly doesn't know how to do it.... Weird! Not sure how I'm going to teach our kids to chew quietly with him around. 

One of my coworkers has a bouncy ball that she keeps at her desk. When she is bored she bounces it on her desk. So I will hear THUMP Thump thump ..thump....thump thump....THUMP THump Thump thump...thump. thump THUMP THump Thump thump... thump..thump OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN!!! Ahhhhhh drives me crazy!

sarahufl

My H is the world's LOUDEST CHEWER. It took me about a year of dating him to bring it up. Seriously, it is horrible. Sometimes I look at him and just ask what in the world he is doing to make so much noise.

cupcait927

FI isn't necessarily a loud chewer, but both him and his dad have this jaw popping thing that happens when they chew, and they both also gnash their teeth together as they chew (if they makes any sense - it sounds like they are biting down hard every time they chew). Plus FI does this lip smacking thing that makes it sound like I'm eating in the same room as a dog. And his licks his plate whenever he's done eating (only at home!). This is another lovely trait he got from FFIL. Eating with him and FFIL drives me absolutely batty.

As for work stories, I love to complain about my slacker coworker (who actually came to work today) and how she clips her nails every GD day at work. Nail clipping at work is not okay! Repeat - not okay!

Our admin assistant likes to just wander into everyone's office, even when they're in the middle of a meeting or on the phone. She runs around here like a chicken with her head cut off, like there's a fire all the time, but it's never anything that can't wait until I get off the damn phone. She also has this ridiculously loud laugh that grates on me a little. She's a sweet woman but damn it's a lot quieter around here when she's out of the office. ETA - I had paragraphs. I swear. I tried and tried and nope.

Couggal12

FI can be kind of a loud chewer when he eats. I've learned to suppress my inner rage when it comes to eating meals with him. My Dad is the loudest chewer I've ever met. Growing up it used to be almost unbearable to eat around him.

We have a few annoying nail clippers around the office here. I just don't get why people can't do that shit at home. 

KatieinBkln

Loud chewers are horrible. I don't like crunchy/juicy sounds. And @AlisonM23, I love your sig gif!

[Deleted User]

KatieinBkln   thanks

birdybride2014

My boss constantly spits tiny pieces of food as she eats. It makes me nauseous.

FH chews loudly sometimes and then he gets the death glare from me.

jules3964

FI slurps his soup and it drives me crazy! There's no reason to slurp soup from a spoon. 

But yeah, loud chewers annoy me too.

sarawifenow

FI breathes really loud when he chews. Like he will forcibly exhale through his nose. It drives me crazy, but I figure it is a small price to pay for him.

PineapplePopsicles

SaraBrideSoon said:

FI breathes really loud when he chews. Like he will forcibly exhale through his nose. It drives me crazy, but I figure it is a small price to pay for him.

awww

missdelilah

I really hate loud chewers and unnecessary noise makers too.  Particularly repetitive noises, like pen clicking, or finger drumming.  I completely feel your pain.

I've had the chewing with mouth open conversation with many friends, and even FI.  He's way better with it now, but I want to strangle him all the time because it's apparently impossible for him to take a sip of water without an unnecessary "ahhhh!" at the end of it.  My favorite, was when I had it with a friend, who snapped back, "well, we can't all be good little *insert name of snooty private school here* girls, can we?"  Uh... she went to that school for six years; I went there for two.

lurkergirl

Sometimes FI's jaw pops while he's chewing.  I know he can't help it, but it still annoys the ever loving shit out of me!