RSVP Deadline Questions

twojunebrides

Good Morning!  I'm a long-time lurker, but this is my first post!!!

I've looked everywhere I can, but I can't find a straight answer... What is the best way to determine an RSVP deadline?  Our date is June 20th.... I know invites don't go out for a long time still.  We are working on them this weekend (making them).  Most guests will be traveling... some 4 hours, some across the country.  How do we pick a date for the deadline?  Is there a specific day of the week that it should be on?  Or does that really not matter?

Also.... the hotel we reserved a block of rooms at will hold them until May 20th (one month)----- this seems the norm in our area.  Should we notify guests in some way of this?  Is there a way to even say it without coming across rude?  

thanks for the help! 

twojunebrides

scribe95 said:

The hotel information would usually be handled via a Save the Date and wedding website. Did you do those? If not I guess your only option is to call people up.

We put the info on our wedding website, and said "for information regarding hotel accommodations and other information, please visit **wedding website**" on our save the dates. 

Our caterer needs the headcount 14 days out.  I'm wanting to do it 3 weeks prior so i can get table arrangements done and escort cards made w/o stressing out.  Is that too early?

JaxInBlue

Agree with scribe!  If you didn't do Save the Dates, you could either email OOT guests with the hotel info (I'd probably do that in January/February to make sure your list is finalized).  I'd also list the hotel info on a website, if you have one, and include an insert with your website address as part of your invite.  You could also just include the hotel info on an insert.  If you mail your invites at the typical eight week mark, which would be around April 20, your guests would still have a month to make a reservation before your block releases.

In general, I think it's a good idea to set your RSVP deadline about a week before final numbers are due.  That gives you a few days to let any RSVPs mailed on the last day to reach you, and a few days for you to do your own follow-up.  So if your numbers are due to the caterer on June 10, your RSVP deadline would be June 3.  You could then wait until June 7 to make phone calls to non-responders.

NYCMercedes

twojunebrides said:

scribe95 said:

The hotel information would usually be handled via a Save the Date and wedding website. Did you do those? If not I guess your only option is to call people up.

We put the info on our wedding website, and said "for information regarding hotel accommodations and other information, please visit **wedding website**" on our save the dates. 

Our caterer needs the headcount 14 days out.  I'm wanting to do it 3 weeks prior so i can get table arrangements done and escort cards made w/o stressing out.  Is that too early?

Sounds good to me. You'll need to wait a few days after your respond date to start calling the stragglers for their RSVPs.

huskypuppy14

3 weeks before your wedding is a perfect RSVP date. Our room block supposedly closed 45 days before our wedding, but we still made our RSVP date after that. 

You can include a card with the invites that has the room block information. That way the guests have everything in one place.

JaxInBlue

twojunebrides said:

scribe95 said:

The hotel information would usually be handled via a Save the Date and wedding website. Did you do those? If not I guess your only option is to call people up.

We put the info on our wedding website, and said "for information regarding hotel accommodations and other information, please visit **wedding website**" on our save the dates. 

Our caterer needs the headcount 14 days out.  I'm wanting to do it 3 weeks prior so i can get table arrangements done and escort cards made w/o stressing out.  Is that too early?

@twojunesbrides - Just an idea that worked for me/us: start your tentative seating chart as you do you finalize our guest list.  We had people grouped in an excel sheet as my fam, DH's fam, my friends, his friends, friends of his family and friends of my family.  This helped us get an idea of how many tables we'd need and as people RSVP'ed affirmatively, we starting writing them in to "real" tables.  (There was still drama once the parents got involved, but that's another thread.)

And for the escort cards, if you have the space and time, you can do a few once a week or so based on how many RSVPs are coming in.  My mom did ours, and she didn't want to do them in one sitting (she was writing in calligraphy), so she wound up doing them in batches.  It worked for us because our cards were place cards with ribbon to indicate meal choice, not anything super fancy, and nothing that had to be batch printed.

twojunebrides

thanks for the help! We put the info on our save the dates and website, and then we plan to send invites around April 20th... they will have an insert that says the hotel block will be held until May 20.