Sorry in advance for the long post.
I have never met my biological father. My mom was a kick-ass single mom, and we have always been close. The man I consider my dad is a person she dated (and lived with us) from when I was 11 until I was 21. He was there through my formative years and acted as a father figure. He introduces me to people as his daughter. We had falling out for about a year and didn't talk. It was stupid petty drama on both our ends.He reached out to me, and everything has been fine since. My mom even said she thought it was good we were talking again.
Several months ago the issue of who will walk me down the aisle came up. I asked them both walk me. My mom said she would do whatever I wanted because it's my day. My dad said, "Your mom isn't going to like that." I told him she said she would do whatever, and so he agreed.
Nothing has been said on this topic since. We are getting married Saturday. Last night my mom text me "So what's the plan on who's walking you down the aisle? We haven't talked about it in a while." I told her I still wanted them both to do it. She said, "Can we talk about? Is there a good time tomorrow." I said we could talk tonight. My mom never schedules a time to talk to me, so this is going to be a serious discussion. She obviously has changed her mind, so I'm thinking she is going to say she doesn't want to do it, or she is going to ask me to have my dad not do it.
I am pretty annoyed/hurt by mom that she has had 7 months to discuss this if it bothered her, and she instead waited until we are 4 days out from the wedding. But I thought some objective/neutral opinions would be good here.
I would like the original plan to stay. If she says she doesn't want to do it, I will get over it. But I am not okay with asking my dad to step down. Am I okay to stand my ground here with my mom? She is paying for about half our wedding, but does "she who pays has a say" apply to things like this? I don't want to cause family drama, but I also don't feel like I'm being unreasonable.