Newly engaged and completely lost!

jordanmarie14

My fiancée and I go to Disney every year. This year, he recreated our very first date after taking me on a horse drawn carriage ride and proposed with my grandmothers rings while we watched the fireworks. It was so beautiful!! Now, I don't even know where to start planning! I know its going to (hopefully) be in 2 years. Is that too early to start the planning and engagement photos? What are those photos even for? I feel so overwhelmed reading all these articles about bridal showers and engagement parties? What do I do first? Thank you so much!!

lilacck28

1. Congrats! Take some time to just feel happy! There's no rush.

2. You don't throw your own shower or engagement party. If someone decides they want to host one for you, that's fine, you can then decide to accept or not,  but this isn't something you need to worry about or think about until someone offers.

3. Start saving money right away. Decide with your fiance how much you want to put aside in a savings account each month. Think about Ally. I've heard they have a very good interest rate. Saving money is a good idea for anything-- a rainy day fund, an emergency, a wedding, a house.

4. Think about who you want at your wedding. Lots of people? Small, intimate gathering? This will impact your budget. If you have a small budget, think about having an off meal time, afternoon wedding with cake and punch, or a brunch wedding. That will save you some money.

5. I'd say take 6 months or so to just browse online. Look at venues, get a sense of the "look" you like, start to learn about prices. Start to get a feel for what will be important to you (the dress? music? photography?) This is what I did before I got engaged, though I knew the proposal would be coming based on our timeline talks. Also, lurk/ participate on these wedding boards. You'll get a lot of good ideas, and learn about wedding etiquette.

4. Firm up your budget and guest list a year and a half to a year out from about when you'd like to get married. Like I said, I browsed online a few months before we got engaged. Then I got engaged in April 2014. We're getting married May 2015. I started booking venues in May 2014, so, a year out.

5. The first thing you'll want to book are your venues (where you'll have your ceremony and reception.) The next thing I did was book my photographer, because that was important to me (and my venue covered the food and cake and all that). Then I picked my dress. I was a little early--I did all that May/June. I waited a bit longer to do other things. In... July or August? I booked my officiant, and FI and I picked our wedding party. Don't pick your wedding party until you're about 9 months out. Relationships change. You can't kick someone out of your wedding party without being a bridezilla/ ruining a friendship. This past month (so, 7- 8 months out), we booked the DJ and the florist. We're in final stages of booking the videographer. We also decided on outfits for groomsmen and bridesmaids (we did this very early). I still have to book a makeup/ hair person.

6. 6-8 months before your wedding date, you may want to send Save the Dates. You don't have to. Everyone you send these to MUST also get an invitation.

7. 6-8 weeks before your wedding date is when you send formal invitations.


ETA: I am a planner. I worry if I don't book things early. It is definitely possible to plan a beautiful wedding in 3 months or less. Average timeline, though, is usually planning about a year out. I have 7 months to go and the main stuff is pretty much finished. I'm definitely going to be bored!

KatWAG

^^^^^^ all excellent advice.

lilacck28

oh! and engagement photos. You can do those whenever. I don't think I'm going to take any, it wasn't part of my photographer's package, and they can be expensive. I might get them done with an amateur friend/coworker at some point though. But basically, they're just so you can get some nice photos with your fiance. Some people use those pictures on their save the dates.

lilacck28

Thanks @KatWAG !

jordanmarie14

Thank you so much, Lilacck28! You have no idea how much your advice has helped!

msuprincess04

PP gave great advice. And as for engagement photos, they are totally optional. However, they can be useful to try out a photographer to decide whether to hire them for the wedding and for Save the Dates or holiday cards.

lacqueredlover

First, enjoy being engaged for awhile.  You're not planning on getting married for 2 years so just chill!  Enjoy this time together and in 6-12 months you can start looking at venues.

AddieCake

PPs covered it well, so I just wanted to say congrats and happy planning!

Knottie9051531

I just recently got engaged too, in September, and we have not started planning yet either and our date is about a year and a half away. I hope you get some good information because I'm so lost too.

lilacck28

Knottie9051531 what are you lost with? If you're most specific, we could give advice. If it's just general confusion, see above.