To include the in-laws?

caitgar

never mind

CMGragain

strivelli said:

So when it comes to the wedding invitation I thought I had the wording all figured out until I showed my future mother in law, and she asked me why her and her husband were not included on the invitation, and I told her its because my parents are paying for the reception. She seemed angry/upset, which I don't mean to do, but at the same time they have not offered to pay for anything or offered any help of any sort, not like i am expecting them to at all. I was just wondering if I am being mean for not putting them on the invitation. I have it worded traditionally 

It is a joy that we Mr Mrs First Last name invite you to the celebration of the marriage of our daughter caitlin middle name to groom name on Saturday....and so on, is this wrong that I do not feel I should have to put their names on it as well considering they are not paying for anything? 

This is NOT traditional wording!  The invitation is a note from the HOSTS to the guests, telling them who, what, when and where - not why or how!  Are you already married?  That is what your wording indicates, and that you are inviting people to a party to celebrate a marriage that has already taken place.
Here is traditional wording:

Mr. and Mrs. John Bridesparents
request the pleasure of your company  (homour of your presence for church weddings)
at the marriage of their daughter
Bride's First Middle
to
Mr. Groom's Full Name
Day, date
time o'clock
Venue Name  (Church name)
Address
City, State

If your FMIL doesn't understand this, you can list their names like this, but it isn't traditional.

Mr. and Mrs. John Bridesparents
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their daughter
Bride's First Middle
to
Groom's Full Name
son of Mr. and Mrs. George Groomsparents
(etc.)

The names on the wedding invitation have nothing to do with who is paying.  They indicate who is hosting.  Are your parents helping you plan, keeping track of RSVPs, making up guest lists?  Will they be greeting your guests?  Those are hosting duties.  It is nobody's business who is paying for your wedding.  For instance, some parents just hand the couple a check and say "Here, use this for your wedding."  That is not hosting.
The wedding invitation is not a family tree.
It is not an honor to have your name listed on the invitation.  That does not include anybody.
I am sorry your FMIL is upset about nothing.  Use the alternative wording if it makes her happy.

CMGragain

There was no reason to delete your post.  I gave you good advice.  I also quoted you, so there was no point.

Jen4948

OP, just so you know, how wedding invitations are worded isn't based on who is paying for what.  That's not the guests' business and shouldn't be a factor in the wording.

AddieCake

What a weird DD.

climbingsingle

Jen4948 said:

OP, just so you know, how wedding invitations are worded isn't based on who is paying for what.  That's not the guests' business and shouldn't be a factor in the wording.

Ditto. We put "Together with their parents". Perfect. Covered all our bases. 

I don't get why you deleted though...