Alcohol

Knottie90797258

Any help is appreciated....so my Fiance and I are doing our wedding ourselves.  It will be very small..48 guests total including kids.  I don't think we have a lot of drinkers coming, but were thinking about providing alcohol during the cocktail hour and maybe some during the ceremony.  My question is that I am not thinking that men would opt for a signature drink offered at the cocktail hour over a mixed drink or a beer, but I am not sure.  My fiance's sister suggested a cash bar so people can have mixed drinks, but I don't think that is good to invite people to your wedding and ask them to pay money.  We have talked about having a cash bar if people want something other than beer or wine, but I am still not sure at all.  We will have water, tea and lemonade as well.

Maggie0829

Knottie90797258 said:

Any help is appreciated....so my Fiance and I are doing our wedding ourselves.  It will be very small..48 guests total including kids.  I don't think we have a lot of drinkers coming, but were thinking about providing alcohol during the cocktail hour and maybe some during the ceremony.  My question is that I am not thinking that men would opt for a signature drink offered at the cocktail hour over a mixed drink or a beer, but I am not sure.  My fiance's sister suggested a cash bar so people can have mixed drinks, but I don't think that is good to invite people to your wedding and ask them to pay money.  We have talked about having a cash bar if people want something other than beer or wine, but I am still not sure at all.  We will have water, tea and lemonade as well.

Cash bars are rude so just say no.  Your guests should not have to help pay for things that you want but don't want to or can't afford to host.

Whatever you offer during cocktail hour should be offered through out the entire event.

Have a limited bar and offer beer, wine and a signature drink if you wish, but really beer and wine would be perfectly fine.

climbingsingle

No cash bar. Your instincts about that are right. You're totally fine offering just beer and wine, and a signature cocktail if you want. Just make sure those options are available for the whole event. 

ohannabelle

Your instincts are exactly right- cash bars of any kind are wrong. Host what you can afford- beer, wine, and soft drinks are more than fine. If someone was coming to your house for a party, would you be happy to offer these to guests? I would. If anybody thought it wasn't enough, they'd be rude and ungrateful. A reception is no different. 

esstee33

Knottie90797258 said:

Any help is appreciated....so my Fiance and I are doing our wedding ourselves.  It will be very small..48 guests total including kids.  I don't think we have a lot of drinkers coming, but were thinking about providing alcohol during the cocktail hour and maybe some during the ceremony.  My question is that I am not thinking that men would opt for a signature drink offered at the cocktail hour over a mixed drink or a beer, but I am not sure.  My fiance's sister suggested a cash bar so people can have mixed drinks, but I don't think that is good to invite people to your wedding and ask them to pay money.  We have talked about having a cash bar if people want something other than beer or wine, but I am still not sure at all.  We will have water, tea and lemonade as well.

You may want to stop gender stereotyping when deciding what drinks to offer. Some men like mixed drinks. My FI almost exclusively drinks rum & cokes along with sips of whatever beer I have just to try it. He didn't really drink beer at all until he met me. I drink Maker's Mark and Jameson straight and otherwise beer or red wine. Your reproductive parts don't dictate your taste in alcohol. 

NYCMercedes

Another vote for just beer and wine.

amelisha

esstee33 said:

Knottie90797258 said:

Any help is appreciated....so my Fiance and I are doing our wedding ourselves.  It will be very small..48 guests total including kids.  I don't think we have a lot of drinkers coming, but were thinking about providing alcohol during the cocktail hour and maybe some during the ceremony.  My question is that I am not thinking that men would opt for a signature drink offered at the cocktail hour over a mixed drink or a beer, but I am not sure.  My fiance's sister suggested a cash bar so people can have mixed drinks, but I don't think that is good to invite people to your wedding and ask them to pay money.  We have talked about having a cash bar if people want something other than beer or wine, but I am still not sure at all.  We will have water, tea and lemonade as well.

You may want to stop gender stereotyping when deciding what drinks to offer. Some men like mixed drinks. My FI almost exclusively drinks rum & cokes along with sips of whatever beer I have just to try it. He didn't really drink beer at all until he met me. I drink Maker's Mark and Jameson straight and otherwise beer or red wine. Your reproductive parts don't dictate your taste in alcohol. 

What she said. Don't try to guess who's going to drink what based on their gender. Not going to work. My fiance is allergic to beer and wine and drinks vodka cranberry when we go out, and a lot of servers have been side-eyed when they show up at my table and hand me his pink drink instead of my Lagavulin with a water back. 

Signature cocktails are tricky - they can be expensive and, if in the hands of an inexperienced bartender, poorly made and certainly not to everyone's taste. If you're going to offer limited alcohol, I think just beer and wine is as good as those plus a signature cocktail (despite my fiance's allergy, even.)

atlastmrsg

By doing the wedding yourself, do you mean planning?  Buying the alcohol?  Or actually executing the day of events?  It's fine to plan it and buy the alcohol, but the day of needs to be thought through.  Your venue or event insurance policy may not allow people to serve themselves/unlicensed bartenders.  

And, having a professional bartending service adds to the quality of the event.  You have someone picking up the glasses as guests finish drinks and set them down, someone pouring to control the size of the drink and potential service to guests who have had enough, bartenders working quickly so the wait is minimized, and someone to bring everything you need--glasses in the appropriate sizes and shapes for the types of drink, mixers, appropriate garnishes like limes and cherries...

Knottie90797258

Thanks to those offered great advice.  My bad on the gender drink issue..now I know.

Knottie90797258

By doing the wedding yourself, do you mean planning?  Buying the alcohol?  Or actually executing the day of events?  It's fine to plan it and buy the alcohol, but the day of needs to be thought through.  Your venue or event insurance policy may not allow people to serve themselves/unlicensed bartenders.  

And, having a professional bartending service adds to the quality of the event.  You have someone picking up the glasses as guests finish drinks and set them down, someone pouring to control the size of the drink and potential service to guests who have had enough, bartenders working quickly so the wait is minimized, and someone to bring everything you need--glasses in the appropriate sizes and shapes for the types of drink, mixers, appropriate garnishes like limes and cherries...

I am doing the planning and might buy the alcohol, but we will have a bartender to mix drinks, etc.  Thanks for the great info!!

Lauderdale Pink

For the cocktail hour, you can serve punch, there are tons of recipes on Pinterest and really pretty punch servers in Walmart and Target.  For my FDIL's bridal shower, I did one with champagne and one "dry" in spigot servers (ice in ziplock bags went unseen).  I went with pink just because it is easy and pretty, but colors are endless.  I also think that a bottle of red wine and a bottle of white pre-set on each table looks really nice and becomes part of the table-scape.  You can always leave out bottles of liquor for those who want to mix sodas.  Last, I have found that beer is always appreciated.

ElcaB

Your instinct is right; cash bars are rude. There's absolutely nothing wrong with serving just beer and wine --- if anyone is that picky, they can choose to not drink. 

FWIW, I've been to several beer-and-wine-only weddings and everyone had a marvelous time with no complaints.