Wedding Invitations & Paper

How do I make it ABSOLUTELY clear that guests do not have a plus one?

I am preparing to order our wedding invitations but I need to make it as clear as possible that the names on the envelopes are the ones I am inviting. I don't want people assuming they can bring whoever they want if it's just their name on the envelope. How is this done without sounding like a terrible person or insensitive? All suggestions welcome! Thank you!

Re: How do I make it ABSOLUTELY clear that guests do not have a plus one?

  • I received an invite where the RSVP had  Attending: [blank] of 1 and the couple had already filled in the 1 to make it just a little more obvious that if I was going it was just me, as my putting in 2 of 1 would be ridiculous.
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    You make it clear by only putting the names of those invited on the envelope.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • princessleia22princessleia22 Oceanfront Property in Arizona member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer

    Like others said, writing the names of each invited person "should" be clear. Most people should understand it, but sadly there are often a few that assume others are included. 

     

    I have seen many times where people worded the RSVP as:

    ____ seats have been reserved in your honor

    Then fill in the number of guests invited. This is probably the best sure-fire way. Here are examples:

     

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    roo0926doeydo
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    You list only the names of the persons you are actually inviting on the inner envelope (if you are using them) or on the envelope (if you are not using inner envelopes).  You do not use wording that conveys in any way that children or anyone else is not invited.  And if someone RSVPs for uninvited guests, you contact them and tell them that you apologize for the misunderstanding, but only those persons whose names are on the envelope can be accommodated at your wedding.

    This of course assumes that you are inviting everyone who is in a relationship together with their SO.  Not to do so would be very rude.
    doeydo
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    If you are inviting John Smith, you send the invite to just John Smith. That's it. None of my guests RSVP'd with people that weren't invited. 

    doeydo
  • PPs have covered how to address the envelope. 

    For the RSVP, you could use any/all of the following:

    - incorporate "Number attending" 
    - incorporate "We have reserved ___ seat(s) in your honor."
    - ask that guests initial by their menu choice (if having a set menu)

    If you see a number higher than you invited or initials of people you did not invite, follow up and say, "I'm sorry for any confusion but the invitation was only for you. Hope you can make it!"

    Ditto @ShesSoCold - plus ones are only relevant to truly single guests. Someone's boyfriend/girlfriend/fiance/spouse is NOT a plus one - etiquette requires these people are invited.
    *********************************************************************************

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    doeydo
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    roo0926 said:
    I am preparing to order our wedding invitations but I need to make it as clear as possible that the names on the envelopes are the ones I am inviting. I don't want people assuming they can bring whoever they want if it's just their name on the envelope. How is this done without sounding like a terrible person or insensitive? All suggestions welcome! Thank you!
    I agree with everything all other PP's have said.  What you have to understand, and accept, is that there is NO RSVP card that will absolutely guarantee you that only those you invited will be included on the card. 
  • Thank you for all the suggestions! Very helpful! I am just talking about the people I am inviting that are not in relationships with people.
  • Just want to echo all the PP's above.  I did have one friend RSVP for her and her bf (she was very recently un-engaged, and no one knew she had a new bf when we sent invites!!!!!)  Obviously this was an error on my part, I didn't even think to ask.  

    Point being, follow the advice of PP's, but if possible, leave a little wiggle room in your numbers for new relationships!!! 
    [Deleted User]
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