Gay Weddings

XP: same-sex marriage two ceremonies... help.

Okay.  This is a bit of a long question.

FI and I met at college in a state that does not have marriage equality.  We currently live in that same state.  We decided to have our wedding on campus at the college we met at---knowing that we wouldn't be able to have a legal ceremony there.  But it is what we consider home, near our guests, has meaning to us... And we absolutely love both or ceremony and reception venue.  

Anyway, a neighboring state does have marriage equality.  And we intend on making our marriage legal by traveling across the state line to sign our liscence and say whatever legal things need to be said.  The state line is literally 3 miles from our venue.  We would have gotten married across the state boarder if there was a venue that could fit our needs.  There is not.  So now, we have this situation.  

The legal part of our day is very important to me and FI, but so is the ceremony we will be having on our college campus.  We will need to bring our witnesses, officiant, and I would like to bring our photographer.  I guess anyone else isn't necessary.  We had originally discussed having immediate family (FI mom and dad, and three brothers, my mom and stepdad and three brothers, and FI's grandmother.)  We didn't think this was too much.. but we met with our officiant and she seemed to think it was a bad idea and said that it would be a shame for us to drag all these people across the boarder for a two-minute ordeal.  

It feels like SO much more than that to me though.  And I tried to talk to my mom about it, but she keeps saying that she only cares about my "real" ceremony... meaning the one on campus.  Yes, that one is important to me, but the legal one is too. 

I guess I just dont' know what to do.  I hate that I can't just have the legal shit happen at our ceremony.  It seems like nobody besides FI and I even care about the legal part.. so maybe I shouldn't make a big deal about it.  

Help.  What do you think? 

Re: XP: same-sex marriage two ceremonies... help.

  • I am legally married and  a very delayed reception, for me it was important to have people I loved there. That was my wedding the reception is the big party to share with all the rest of the family and friends. 
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards