Dear Prudence,
Four years ago, my husband of nearly 20 years came home, told me he didn’t want to be married any longer, and moved out that day. In the tumultuous aftermath, I became involved with a man who was a starving artist and going though an extremely difficult period of his own life. Subsequently, said artist published his first book, which received much acclaim including becoming a New York Times best-seller. He has since written a second book—heralded as “one of the most anticipated of the year”—which will hit the bookstores this month. In it he writes of our time together, including passages about my sorrow and the actions of my former spouse. The book is kind and tender toward me, and having my story told by a talented author has been extraordinary. While my ex-husband is not named, my first name is used in the book and it is dedicated to me. I have arrived at a reasonable working relationship with my former spouse and we are the parents of a young adult child. My question is: Do I have an ethical obligation to inform my former spouse there are unflattering passages being printed about him?